Venting i feel like its coming soon

[chundryshire]

the only thing preventing me is my not wanting to hurt my parents and my boyfriend. i dont have any sort of note (because i feel like i could never fully explain why i want to ctb and any attempt would probably misconstrue it) and i definitely dont want this to be an impulse thing, but ive had the means and been seriously planning this for months. i just feel so awful that i was born, i feel so bad for my parents. they feel alien and everyone else feels alien, like the way they live and think and find happiness is so different from me. idk. i suppose im also scared of what could be after death, although ive just about always been agnostic and think its the same as before you were born.

 

[jodes2]

Sorry you're struggling

 

[FuneralCry]

I've never been able to relate to people in this world as well, especially those that for some reason want to stay here. But I guess that as humans we all experience life differently after all. I do believe and hope that once we die we simply cease to exist but there is no point to fearing death as it's our fate as humans to die and be forgotten about anyway. I wish you freedom from your suffering for when the time feels right for you to leave.