I don't want to get better. Anyone else?

[lostmylove]

Getting 'better' is an impossible task from this position. It would involve time travel.

So from my current position I don't want things to get 'better' as that's as likely as finding Atlantis. So rather then drag my life out for potentially years doing unfulfilling crap and drifting on, it's better to go with dignity.

 

[lobster salad]

Even if I had a button I could click and be happy forever, I wouldn't press it.

I don't want to get better. I am fixated on being bad and killing myself. I can't explain it. It's like a curse, so irrational. Who else feels this?

Me neither. I just feel like it is a trap. Being happy, is being good at suppressing suffering and self lies. Ever since my mind entered this curse it corrupted me so much there is no way out at all, unless my brain is completely rewired back or if I induce amnesia

 

[FailureGirl]

I feel the same, I have fleeting moments of happiness but they don't feel genuine and I always just want to crawl back down into my depression and stay there.

 

[WorthlessTrash]

Nope, I do not. The 2 "solutions" that are practical to my issue are not solutions I am interested in.

 

[Fadeawaaaay]

I was hoping to get worse. At least within the shroud of depression I can sleep all the time and pretend this isn't happening to me. But the depression has worn off and now I can see the ruination all around me. But like you said, I would need a time machine to actually fix my life. That or a Herculean effort that is beyond my motivation right now.

 

[bpder]

I can't get better until everything around me gets better too

 

[mrselfdestruct]

I've focused my whole existence around hating myself and everyone around me. I don't want to heal and be nothing.

 

[partialhang]

Unless they find a cure for MS I'll never get better

 

[FuneralCry]

No. I do not want to live at all, I want nothing to do with this horrible world. There is nothing to get better from, there is nothing wrong with me, it is life that is the problem, existence itself is the cause of all my suffering. I do not want to exist until old age, the thought of that is absolutely horrifying. I just want the eternal peace that only death can bring.

 

[ornitier199]

Nope, I will die young, no matter what happens.