Story i don’t know if i really want to ctb

[m2107]

i don't how to organize my thoughts and i don't want to die and make my bf sad because he's the only person in my life but i don't really wanna live anymore

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

Your post is labeled help. What kind of help are you seeking for this situation?

 

[TVtrays]

Maybe it would help to kind of organize your thoughts a bit. I know it can be quite rough when you have conflicting thoughts and desires.

 

[Gerb]

I hear ya. I have "significant others" and I get so depressed when I dwell on that I will be CTB and "abandon" them. It's one of the hardest things about the experience of suicidal ideation. Guilt comes into play.

 

[m2107]

Your post is labeled help. What kind of help are you seeking for this situation?

i'm scared because i can't control my mind i don't want to do anything without thinking

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

i'm scared because i can't control my mind i don't want to do anything without thinking

Okay, that's a little more clear. Making progress. :)

But again, what kind of help are you seeking from us fellow members in this thread?

Comfort? Advice? If advice, specifically what kind?

Lots folks here want to help, please guide us as to what help you want/need from us.

 

[UpandDownPrincess]

i don't how to organize my thoughts and i don't want to die and make my bf sad because he's the only person in my life but i don't really wanna live anymore

You don't have to do anything right now.

You've said that you don't want to die, so for right now, you won't. Don't do anything that would make that happen until you're 100% sure it's what you want.

We know that one reason to stay seems to be your boyfriend. I am hoping that he adds more to your life than just not wanting to make him sad.

What reasons do you have for not wanting to live anymore? Give it a good hard think and make a list. Please share it with us - we really do want to help and we've been in your shoes.

 

[m2107]

I hear ya. I have "significant others" and I get so depressed when I dwell on that I will be CTB and "abandon" them. It's one of the hardest things about the experience of suicidal ideation. Guilt

Okay, that's a little more clear. Making progress. :)

But again, what kind of help are you seeking from us fellow members in this thread?

Comfort? Advice? If advice, specifically what kind?

Lots folks here want to help, please guide us as to what help you want/need from us.

im new here, i think i need to read more of the threads and interact more