suicidaltoad
Member
- Mar 9, 2020
- 43
I don't want to say exactly what my problem is, I have no reason to really be having THIS much anxiety over it, but I potentially ruined my life over something I don't even support anymore... Haven't done it in almost a year, truly haven't had any desires to do it at all, yet I still feel like a fucking fraud and I deserve to be shot and just thrown in a dumpster, forgotten about. The sheer terror I've been feeling for 4 days now is really starting to get unbearable. I can't even really form what I'm thinking into words... so much terror, self loathing, I'm just so tired of it all yet I don't necessarily want to die because I truly have been doing better and I can continue to do better, but the possibility that my life could be ruined in the future over this is just so terrifying. I'm such a disappointment to society. I have my first therapy appointment on Tuesday and I don't think I can talk to him about it... I'm such a piece of shit human being. I haven't been able to function at all this week which makes me feel even worse. Anyway I'll stop talking, nobody cares about people like me.