Painless_end
Life is too difficult for me
- Oct 11, 2019
- 794
So many here are in such pain. I wish them all peace and hope they make the right choice for themselves.
Coming to myself, I just can't live with myself anymore. I made some cowardly choices long ago and since then, my life has been very unsatisfactory.
I have not had any interest in my career lately. Everything boils down to an unfortunate lack of making a courageous choice many years ago that would have let me go to another country for education and a career. But I was too weak and cowardly, I overanalyzed and ultimately decided that I wanted to have less responsibility than what I would have had going there.
It seemed like the right choice for many years. But as things go, when you skip a certain responsibility in life at a certain point of time, it comes back to bite you later.
And now it has. The time of answering to myself for my own lack of ambition, allowing myself to become lazy and complacent.
My life was relatively stable all these years. But my time of reckoning has come. And now I can't live with what I chose.
Now there is only unhappiness in myself and my family.
How I wish I had the strength to choose differently. But my wishing makes no difference. As the saying goes, if wishes were horses, beggars would ride them.
Be careful, young members. If you are not seriously considering suicide you may still have a chance to rectify your life if you make wise choices. Consider the long term impacts. Don't end up like me, having to run away from everything and then regretting it later.
My time to face my own failures has come.
Coming to myself, I just can't live with myself anymore. I made some cowardly choices long ago and since then, my life has been very unsatisfactory.
I have not had any interest in my career lately. Everything boils down to an unfortunate lack of making a courageous choice many years ago that would have let me go to another country for education and a career. But I was too weak and cowardly, I overanalyzed and ultimately decided that I wanted to have less responsibility than what I would have had going there.
It seemed like the right choice for many years. But as things go, when you skip a certain responsibility in life at a certain point of time, it comes back to bite you later.
And now it has. The time of answering to myself for my own lack of ambition, allowing myself to become lazy and complacent.
My life was relatively stable all these years. But my time of reckoning has come. And now I can't live with what I chose.
Now there is only unhappiness in myself and my family.
How I wish I had the strength to choose differently. But my wishing makes no difference. As the saying goes, if wishes were horses, beggars would ride them.
Be careful, young members. If you are not seriously considering suicide you may still have a chance to rectify your life if you make wise choices. Consider the long term impacts. Don't end up like me, having to run away from everything and then regretting it later.
My time to face my own failures has come.