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fearmenot

Member
Oct 25, 2020
89
Yayy I'm so happy to finally be able to use this community as a support system. I'm somewhere in the middle of ctb and one last shred of hope in life. I did try partial hanging a couple of weeks ago and I couldn't find the arteries so I had to stop because of all the pressure building up in my head. I'm a cutter but I've never been able to cut deep enough for it to require stitches or the hospital. I'm thinking about buying some SN online and just finally calling it quits. I'm just so scared because if I mess up somewhere in it there's that chance of developing organ damage. I probably would fail at it, I fail at life constantly so why would death be different.
 
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Cursed4ever

Cursed4ever

I Want Everything to Stop
Oct 9, 2020
175
Big Hug Buddy
Wish You Get Your Peace
 
F

fearmenot

Member
Oct 25, 2020
89
Big Hug Buddy
Wish You Get Your Peace
Thank you Varun, I really hope one day we all get our peace. Ppl outside of this community probably think it's full of attention seeking pity partiers but it's really full of such deeply compassionate caring people who have just been so beaten down. Peace from death or finally being able to have peace from living is a wish I have for anyone here
 
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Astronomer

Astronomer

Mentally, i'm in space, in reality, i am in hell.
Oct 6, 2020
150
Welcome, friend.
 
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F

fearmenot

Member
Oct 25, 2020
89
Thank you @Hopeindeath! and @Astronomer. I'm curious how close have you guys ever gotten?
 
GoodPersonEffed

GoodPersonEffed

Brevity is my middle name, but my name was TL
Jan 11, 2020
6,726
I'm thinking about buying some SN online and just finally calling it quits. I'm just so scared because if I mess up somewhere in it there's that chance of developing organ damage.

What gives you reason to think there's a chance of developing organ damage?
 
Lilacmoon

Lilacmoon

Beautiful moon, take me away.
Sep 23, 2020
1,308
welcome. I hope you find a little solace during your stay here to help make things a tiny bit more bearable.
 
F

fearmenot

Member
Oct 25, 2020
89
What gives you reason to think there's a chance of developing organ damage?
I believe I read it in another post, that it's so toxic that if you don't die from it you'll end up with some irreversible damage.
 
Lilacmoon

Lilacmoon

Beautiful moon, take me away.
Sep 23, 2020
1,308
I believe I read it in another post, that it's so toxic that if you don't die from it you'll end up with some irreversible damage.

Methylene blue will reverse pretty much everything according to what I've read. So as long as the hospital can see that it's SN they'll know what to do.
 
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F

fearmenot

Member
Oct 25, 2020
89
welcome. I hope you find a little solace during your stay here to help make things a tiny bit more bearable.
Honestly I really have. There are all these things in my brain that I struggle with and can't talk to ppl about. Not because they won't listen but because they love me so much it hurts them. But I finally feel like I can be honest here
Methylene blue will reverse pretty much everything according to what I've read. So as long as the hospital can see that it's SN they'll know what to do.
I wouldn't want to go to the hosp lol. I'd want my failure to be my own secret
 
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GoodPersonEffed

GoodPersonEffed

Brevity is my middle name, but my name was TL
Jan 11, 2020
6,726
I believe I read it in another post, that it's so toxic that if you don't die from it you'll end up with some irreversible damage.

Nope. It's imo the best method for not having long-term effects. The biggest concern is that the methelyne blue can affect the kidneys, but all of the online medical reports have shown 100% recovery for SN and methylene blue, and for what it's worth, no members have ever reported any long-term permanent damage.
 
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H

Hopeindeath!

Warlock
Dec 7, 2019
799
Thank you @Hopeindeath! and @Astronomer. I'm curious how close have you guys ever gotten?
I have taken many chances in which I could have died, but I've never done anything thinking I'm going to die.
 
mahakaliSS_MahaDurga

mahakaliSS_MahaDurga

Visionary
Apr 2, 2020
2,399
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Busdriver

Busdriver

Mage
Feb 11, 2020
513
Tigeress Lost, is that you, @Varun? Good spot, btw. I somehow missed the posts with all words capitalized.

If it is really you, you took SN and survived?
 
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peacechoice

peacechoice

Experienced
Oct 11, 2020
205
Thank you Varun, I really hope one day we all get our peace. Ppl outside of this community probably think it's full of attention seeking pity partiers but it's really full of such deeply compassionate caring people who have just been so beaten down. Peace from death or finally being able to have peace from living is a wish I have for anyone here
Beautifully stated
 
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Reactions: Cursed4ever
x~Sophia~x

x~Sophia~x

Always give 100% - unless you’re donating blood.
Sep 10, 2020
1,360
Thank you Varun, I really hope one day we all get our peace. Ppl outside of this community probably think it's full of attention seeking pity partiers but it's really full of such deeply compassionate caring people who have just been so beaten down. Peace from death or finally being able to have peace from living is a wish I have for anyone here
Why do you mention "Ppl outside of this community"?
 
Cursed4ever

Cursed4ever

I Want Everything to Stop
Oct 9, 2020
175
Tigeress Lost, is that you, @Varun? Good spot, btw. I somehow missed the posts with all words capitalized.

If it is really you, you took SN and survived?
No buddy
 
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Reactions: x~Sophia~x and Busdriver
RedRed

RedRed

Member
Oct 24, 2020
93
Yayy I'm so happy to finally be able to use this community as a support system. I'm somewhere in the middle of ctb and one last shred of hope in life. I did try partial hanging a couple of weeks ago and I couldn't find the arteries so I had to stop because of all the pressure building up in my head. I'm a cutter but I've never been able to cut deep enough for it to require stitches or the hospital. I'm thinking about buying some SN online and just finally calling it quits. I'm just so scared because if I mess up somewhere in it there's that chance of developing organ damage. I probably would fail at it, I fail at life constantly so why would death be different.
Heyyaaa! I wanna give u the warmest welcome I can offer! I'm both glad and sad that you're here tbh. Seeing new members everyday in this site just...I feel this weird pain in my heart lol. While you're still here I hope a lot of people could give you the comfort that you need. Oh and friends as well! Nobody here wants you to feel alone :'))
 
mahakaliSS_MahaDurga

mahakaliSS_MahaDurga

Visionary
Apr 2, 2020
2,399
Did you post here under the name Tigeress Lost?
Tigeress Lost, is that you, @Varun? Good spot, btw. I somehow missed the posts with all words capitalized.

If it is really you, you took SN and survived?
To be fair, another user told me that Varun sounds a lot like our old friend.
 
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Lazuli

Lazuli

Member
Oct 26, 2020
17
I too can't for the life of me find my carotid arteries. SN sounds tempting, but I have Irritable Bowel Syndrome. I fear the stomach pain might become unbearable because of that.
 
StuFin

StuFin

Arcanist
Oct 21, 2020
449
I too can't for the life of me find my carotid arteries. SN sounds tempting, but I have Irritable Bowel Syndrome. I fear the stomach pain might become unbearable because of that.
I think you'll only have to bear any discomfort for a few minutes, some people are unconscious in less than 5 minutes.
 
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