Help I came out about the TRUTH

[Suicide_1992]

Hey Guys

I'm a Victim of psychological abuse and I recently came back home to my Parents House due to a death in the family, it was requested by my parents to come back home as I wasn't doing very well on my own apparently.

I recently I spoke to my parents about the way I grew up and stuff and how its still effecting me, even as im living here my Dad is still abusing me Mentally calling me crazy and wants me to get sectioned.

I suffered from auditory hallucinations/flashback memory's from a young age that stayed with me until January 2021, I was being Commanded to CTB as it was, Strange Visual Hallucinations in my mind of what he wanted me to do ECT and how he wanted me to CTB (Pretty Sick)

I eventually broke down and went crazy I guess I told my Mum about what the Voice was telling me to do, I was then put on to a Suicide Prevention phone call and I explained exactly what was going on, I recently had my Assessment and the team said it was Psychological Abuse the next day I told my parents about it and now im the bad guy in the house.

At home im being Blanked I try speak to my parents and I dont get a reply at all and I feel like they've completely disconnected from me now

I'm working with Home Based Treatment Team and have been for a few weeks and things dont seem to be getting any better, im isolated in my bedroom and have been for a few week.

I have no idea what to do.

 

[WornOutLife]

Omg dear, I'm so sorry you're going through this. I wish your family could understand you and give you a hand in a better way.

Anyway, just try to do whatever that "team" tell you to do. The more you deny, the worse it gets.
Just try to do a good job so as to be free ASAP.

Hugs and best of luck!

 

[Suicide_1992]

Anyway, just try to do whatever that "team" tell you to do. The more you deny, the worse it gets.

I had a Home meeting with the Team today and it seems like they're letting go of me at some point, they mentioned about transferring me to a totally different Team as they dont seem to understand my situation at all.

the part that has me stuck is I want to work on my life and have been working hard for a while (Breaking The Voice) working on my sleep and wake up time, actually looking after myself properly.

I just feel empty now my family has disconnected from me and I feel like they've given up on me completely and are waiting to kick me out.

I used to have issues in the past where I thought people (Parents) were setting cameras up to spy on me and that people were out to get me, I used to search for them and not finding them, this went on for years even after I left home, from searching my friends house to my sisters house and my bedsits. at the bedsit there were a few big ish holes and id use something like toilet paper to plug them up as I had beliefs there was cameras there watching me.

my last bedsit I lived there for 4 years and had the same issue but instead of believing my parents were spying on me I believed it was my landlord. these thoughts would usually disappear (being spied on) if I either checked for them and didn't see them or I did something like blocking up the hole

I dont believe in cameras spying on me and haven't since January, but the belief my Parents didn't bring me home to give me a better life and instead are trying to destroy me further is a big issue, im trying to work with them about it all and they dont want to know me.

 

[Tackingintothewind]

My mother used to blank me. Maybe give them some time. They probably never considered how their behaviour appeared from your pov. With time to come to terms with what you said they might be more supportive.

Also try and get a non family support unit too.

 

[timf]

It sounds like you have made huge progress in recognizing what is probable and what may not be. If you share with your parents that you have been mistaken in the past and are working on what you might be getting wrong now, it may open a door to reconnecting.

No one likes to be accused. Your parents may just be defensive to what they see as accusations from you. They may be disinclined as they may fear facing another round of accusations. The idea of cultivating non-family connections might be a good way to relieve some of the pressure they may be feeling and provide yourself with alternative resources.

 

[Suicide_1992]

They probably never considered how their behaviour appeared from your pov.

I do think they know what damage they did to me and how its effected me and they dont want to accept it. My mum would always look for anything and everything she could pick at to start arguments which would usually lead to me being hit by my dad.

When I told her I didn't want to be around anymore and she told me to CTB, that was the usual behaviour of her and how nothing was her fault.

when I spoke up about it recently I figured it would help me move forward and they would be more supportive of my situation but instead they turned me into the bad guy.

Its been over a week since I had a reply from them, and ive been trying every couple days to talk with them I speak and I get no reply and they just walk away from me.

 

[Tackingintothewind]

You would think my mum would have known too but she didnt. We are coming to terms with it now. She did blank me however as it was messing with her world view, she gave me the silent treatment for a month so its possible your parents are doing the same.

 

[Suicide_1992]

We are coming to terms with it now.

How's that going for you?

She did blank me however as it was messing with her world view.

I think this becomes the same situation as myself, and how I think they thought that's how to behave towards a child right?

And now im back home they seem to think Them bringing me home to help me and me coming out with my problems is me throwing it in the faces in a way, which is not intended at all I just want them to understand how it makes me feel even today years later.

she gave me the silent treatment for a month so its possible your parents are doing the same.

I dont think I can handle a Month to be honest, I feel Paranoid about going outside in case I come back and the door is locked and im homeless, the atmosphere in the house is awful I dread exiting my bedroom to go downstairs in case I come across someone and they pretend im not there.

its a horrible situation to be in and I do hope we can resolve it soon. its fuelling my negative side so much I just want to give up.

 

[whywere]

1st off I AM SO, SO SORRY FOR YOU, not only my heart but mu entire body broke in pieces after reading your post. NOBODY EVER deserves what hell you were AND are being put through. Damn they will not even talk with you?? WELL, I have a solution for that 1) you have your global family here that loves and cares so, so much for you, we are 1 HUGE family, and I am here, please feel free to pm me, I grew up with "parents" who called me "the mistake" to my face, in public and kicked me out at 18 and never spoke to me again, their choice, so we are at least somewhat alike.
ALSO.. WELCOME to Sanctioned Suicide new global family member!!!! I am thrilled to have you join the finest global family, heck greatest family ever. Everyone here is just so kind, loving, caring with so much empathy and SUPPORT that it makes all of us a force in regards to helping one another.The global family has helped me some many times and my wish for you is the same. AGAIN...WELCOME!!! Walter ( real first name, 65 years young, gray hair and NEVER phony)

 

[Tackingintothewind]

How's that going for you?


I think this becomes the same situation as myself, and how I think they thought that's how to behave towards a child right?

And now im back home they seem to think Them bringing me home to help me and me coming out with my problems is me throwing it in the faces in a way, which is not intended at all I just want them to understand how it makes me feel even today years later.


I dont think I can handle a Month to be honest, I feel Paranoid about going outside in case I come back and the door is locked and im homeless, the atmosphere in the house is awful I dread exiting my bedroom to go downstairs in case I come across someone and they pretend im not there.

its a horrible situation to be in and I do hope we can resolve it soon. its fuelling my negative side so much I just want to give up.

My mum and I are getting there slowly. I'm bigger and stronger than her now no longer the little girl hiding fearfully under the bed. I lived abroad for 7 years so coming back home after my breakdown has been difficult. Fortunately for me I confronted her about the truth years ago when I was living abroad so most of the month silent treatment was when I was not even living there. I do not know how you living with you parents will affect the silent treatment. But I definitely sympathise with once again living with your abuser.

 

[Suicide_1992]

1st off I AM SO, SO SORRY FOR YOU, not only my heart but mu entire body broke in pieces after reading your post. NOBODY EVER deserves what hell you were AND are being put through. Damn they will not even talk with you?? WELL, I have a solution for that 1) you have your global family here that loves and cares so, so much for you, we are 1 HUGE family, and I am here, please feel free to pm me, I grew up with "parents" who called me "the mistake" to my face, in public and kicked me out at 18 and never spoke to me again, their choice, so we are at least somewhat alike.

Thankyou Walter

I originally left home myself at 15 years old after telling a friend from school I was being threatened of being thrown out, as my birthday was coming up and that was the legal age where they could throw me out as it was.

I grew up as "The Mistake" that remark was popular between both parents and seemed to come and go for no reason, Often told I should have been given up at Birth or shouldn't have even been born (I used to wish I hadn't at times) my dad used to say stuff when he saw I was upset after he said something horrible to me, how I shouldn't take it to heart and stuff. He was right I didn't take it to heart I took it to my mind instead. I still get Flashbacks of him standing over me with a smile on his face while he beat me.

ALSO.. WELCOME to Sanctioned Suicide new global family member!!!! I am thrilled to have you join the finest global family, heck greatest family ever. Everyone here is just so kind, loving, caring with so much empathy and SUPPORT that it makes all of us a force in regards to helping one another.The global family has helped me some many times and my wish for you is the same. AGAIN...WELCOME!!! Walter ( real first name, 65 years young, gray hair and NEVER phony)

I'm so happy to be here on Sanctioned Suicide, I know im in the right place and I hope other members here know they are too. I feel better after sharing my experience's, and I know other people Are/Have been through the same problems as me.

My mum and I are getting there slowly. I'm bigger and stronger than her now no longer the little girl hiding fearfully under the bed. I lived abroad for 7 years so coming back home after my breakdown has been difficult. Fortunately for me I confronted her about the truth years ago when I was living abroad so most of the month silent treatment was when I was not even living there. I do not know how you living with you parents will affect the silent treatment. But I definitely sympathise with once again living with your abuser.

I'm happy for you and I hope your doing well.

But I definitely sympathise with once again living with your abuser.

Its only been a week of no talking and ive been through 7 years of not speaking to my mum and that was her choice, its not like I haven't tried I went through my sister trying to get her to speak with me.

as for living back at the same house everything happened in, its still the same house just different wallpaper that doesn't change memories but brought them all back, especially being in the same bedroom I grew up in. even being happy around them upsets them and my dad would usually bring the "You Were A Mistake" to drop me down again.