I am planning to tell people my SASU account before I CTB in the future.

[angelhopes]

I feel like if they saw what I was posting they will be able to get some closure on why I did it. It will also break some stigma where they would think that people here helped me into killing myself when it isn't. They will see what lead me to actually doing it instead of just assuming that I did it out of compulsiveness. My friends would probably feel more at peace knowing that I was sorrounded by people that does not judge me nor enable me with the decisions that I'm about to make.

 

[unluckysadness]

I'm planning to do it too. I want them to see how much I suffered in this miserable "life".

 

[Passenger4224]

I don't think it's worth it. I think everything will simply fly over their heads and they will just believe whatever they want to believe. They might even push for this site to be shut down.

Humans suck.

 

[Fadenself00_]

I don't think it's worth it. I think everything will simply fly over their heads and they will just believe whatever they want to believe. They might even push for this site to be shut down.

Humans suck.

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[bb142342]

I feel the same way as 'passenger'.

If you want to get something off your chest, a letter or something similar is probably the way to go. But I would never want to deprive others suffering from the same pain of access to this site or other available resources. Nor would I want to expose the people who help with supplies, substances, etc.—the ones who actually sold the items.

Loved ones don't see the suffering the deceased endured; they just want to find someone to blame. In their eyes, that blame falls on the site, or—if they find evidence of the purchase—on the people who sold the materials. And out of frustration, they'll report them.

If I were to actually go through with it, I wouldn't leave a note. It might sound harsh. But like I said, I'd rather just take something and hope the GP doesn't look too closely and simply attributes it to a heart attack during the night.
That would be much easier for my parents to bear than finding out I'd taken my own life.
Then again, if the truth does come out and there's no note—leaving them with no explanation—that would surely be even worse.

 

[darksouls]

I never would do so, because all the " friends " I have had in my life are perverse sociopaths and they would enjoy my suffer

 

[DeathSweetDeath]

I feel the same way as 'passenger'.

If you want to get something off your chest, a letter or something similar is probably the way to go. But I would never want to deprive others suffering from the same pain of access to this site or other available resources. Nor would I want to expose the people who help with supplies, substances, etc.—the ones who actually sold the items.

Loved ones don't see the suffering the deceased endured; they just want to find someone to blame. In their eyes, that blame falls on the site, or—if they find evidence of the purchase—on the people who sold the materials. And out of frustration, they'll report them.

If I were to actually go through with it, I wouldn't leave a note. It might sound harsh. But like I said, I'd rather just take something and hope the GP doesn't look too closely and simply attributes it to a heart attack during the night.
That would be much easier for my parents to bear than finding out I'd taken my own life.
Then again, if the truth does come out and there's no note—leaving them with no explanation—that would surely be even worse.

Take something & hope what? I actually had a friend who died in her sleep of a silent heart attack. The autopsy confirmed that her left coronary artery was 100% blocked. If they suspect it was a heart attack, especially in a younger person, they will want to learn all the details. So please let go of this fairy tale idea of having a mysterious death that never gets investigated. Here's what will happen after we CTB…

Law Enforcement Investigation of Suicides (graphic/crude language warning)

Hey there kiddos, this is your favorite ex cop/current convict COP2CON. Todays lesson is about what happens when you die from suicide from a law enforcement stand point. I dealt with many of these calls and have extensive experience. While I was patrol, because we were short I got to do a lot of...

sanctioned-suicide.net

 

[bb142342]

Fair enough—that's certainly true for younger people.
But i'm over 40 and overweight.

Plus, for the last few weeks, I've noticed some reddish discoloration on my feet, which could indicate heart problems.
I think that come from the daily Ibuprofen

That's why I feel more comfortable with the idea of being able to quickly hide the cup and get into bed.

And if my parents call our GP, he—knowing there's no conflict or anything like that between us—would simply classify it as a natural death.

Where I live, the GP is allowed to do that. Of course, if he were to report it and insist on an examination, that would be a bad situation.

Because if the cup wasn't there, I certainly wouldn't want my parents to come under suspicion.

Right now, my father is bedridden and can't even get up, and the doctor knows my parents are grateful for the help I provide.

But that's exactly why I can't do it at the moment: I feel sorry for my parents, yet I simply can't go on—what with the physical pain and now problems at work, too.