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How would you die?
Thread startersuicidal.lady
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I think that if I had a good answer to this question I would already be gone at this point. The difficulties, complications, risks and just the fact that suicide is something so inaccessible is the only reason as to why I'm still trapped here in this world.
I think that if I had a good answer to this question I would already be gone at this point. The difficulties, complications, risks and just the fact that suicide is something so inaccessible is the only reason as to why I'm still trapped here in this world.
I don't think that there is a new N supplier, at least I haven't read about one. There are always scams going around though. But anyway I doubt that N would ever be an option for me even if the old supplier still sold it, as it sounds complicated to get and it's illegal anyway, there's just too many risks involved.
But no matter what I refuse to reach old age, the thought of ageing and reaching that point disgusts me. I don't have any plans to die at the current moment but eventually I will have to find a way as I cannot let this existence go on for too long.
I have a few ideas on how I want to ctb and I don't know which one for sure I will choose and end up working. Succeeding is a difficult task, but knowing that other people have done it and made it work for them gives me hope. If they can do it, then maybe I can too. I always reassure myself after a failed attempt by telling myself "Kurushii since you failed at death that means you're a success in life!" lol.
Survival instinct will always get in the way so a method that's fast and that takes away the ability for me to change my mind is something I would need to succeed.
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