How to break up with a girlfriend without breaking her heart?

[not4us]

Question for females. But of course if a male knows the answer, please welcome!

What can make you stop loving your partner without breaking your heart?

Or what should your partner do or what should happen to make you want to break up with him without the result being your broken heart?

Is that even possible?

 

[BPD_LE]

If she loves you, then no, I'm sorry but it's not possible. She will hurt. With time she will heal and eventually move on. You will hurt her more by staying in the relationship if you don't love her. Give her a chance to find someone who loves her back and let her go. It may not feel like it, but it's the kindest thing to do.

 

[not4us]

If she loves you, then no, I'm sorry but it's not possible. She will hurt. With time she will heal and eventually move on. You will hurt her more by staying in the relationship if you don't love her. Give her a chance to find someone who loves her back and let her go. It may not feel like it, but it's the kindest thing to do.

thank you for response, I honestly thought nobody would reply... I called her an hour ago and told her that I was not good for her, she has been crying since then, now she went to shower and I am feeling like I am breaking her heart.... I can't do that. I love her too, but I want to have no anchors when I ctb, she is the last person that loves me so much.. I don't know what to do, thank you again BPD.LE.

 

[BPD_LE]

thank you for response, I honestly thought nobody would reply... I called her an hour ago and told her that I was not good for her, she has been crying since then, now she went to shower and I am feeling like I am breaking her heart.... I can't do that. I love her too, but I want to have no anchors when I ctb, she is the last person that loves me so much.. I don't know what to do, thank you again BPD.LE.

Shit thats hard. I'm in a similar situation actually. Tbh if you're planning to CTB soon, it'll break her heart whether you're together or not. I know what its like when love is just not enough for you to choose life. I'm sorry you're in this situation.

 

[not4us]

Shit thats hard. I'm in a similar situation actually. Tbh if you're planning to CTB soon, it'll break her heart whether you're together or not. I know what its like when love is just not enough for you to choose life. I'm sorry you're in this situation.

I won't ctb soon, I want to make sure nobody cares about me before I do. She is the last one who loves me truly. I want to do that so that she won't even find out that I'm gone.

 

[Santiago]

You should never beat around the bush and just straight up tell them. It's the solution that causes the least harm, but it seems like it's too late for that now considering your last post.

 

[BPD_LE]

I won't ctb soon, I want to make sure nobody cares about me before I do. She is the last one who loves me truly. I want to do that so that she won't even find out that I'm gone.

Then in my opinion. You've done the best for her. You obviously love her. I'm sorry. This world is shit.

 

[Deleted member 1465]

If she loves you, then no, I'm sorry but it's not possible. She will hurt. With time she will heal and eventually move on. You will hurt her more by staying in the relationship if you don't love her. Give her a chance to find someone who loves her back and let her go. It may not feel like it, but it's the kindest thing to do.

Good advice. Seriously. Don't stay with someone you don't want to be with and don't do what some do and just let the relationship slide hoping she'll end it. I've done that before and had it done to me. It's unworthy.

Be straight, honest and heartfelt. It may come over as clichéd but that's just tough. Good luck.