How much more time are you giving yourself?

[MachinaArcana]

I still have a few more things I would like to take care of and attend to (not related to the actual act itself) , but I really want to ctb before the end of this month.
A week should be enough to get everything in order and then make the necessary preparations for my exit, and just get it over with, at last.

 

[Polly]

I want to leave now, this instant, but I think as long as I feel queasy when I see people's names in grey and crossed out, I'm not ready.

This constant battle with myself is a horror show which is just as bad in itself as the rest of my life.

 

[LMLN]

Right now I'm giving myself until late summer or early fall 2020. I dont know if I can make it but I'm trying for the sake of my family.

 

[Cevapcici]

Eight months to three years. I've given up on all my dreams but there's still certain things I want to give an attempt to.

 

[issyishere]

I don't have a set time frame, but I would at least give myself half a year from now, which should be more than ample time for me to get things I plan to do before I CTB. However, if there is a sudden turn for the worst, like a serious life changing event leading to instability and/or serious catalyst, then it could be sooner.

hey i'm doing mine in half a year too, need to wait till summer when i'm alone for a month. maybe we'll be catching the bus one after the other

 

[WhiteEyes]

honestly, I want to go right now.
It won't happen because I don't have access to SN right now. I doubt I'll see Spring at this rate anyway.

 

[Holacanthus]

After having a massive ideation spike in the past month, I changed my mind about the timeline. I decided to take some time off work and do ECT instead. What do I have to lose? If that doesn't work, I'm done.

 

[a.n.kirillov]

Meh I can't really say. My moods are so unstable that I can probably only hope for an impulsive decision in the near future. This is a big reason why I'm trying to obtain N. I've started the regimen for SN a couple times now but it is just unfeasible for me to stay that low for more than a few hours at most. With N I see a stat dose as sufficient and in an hour I could be gone on impulse.

 

[the_inbetween]

Once I get my pentobarbital, odansetron, domperidone. So about two months I assume.

 

[galaticgrizzly]

I am giving myself until Tuesday. My plan is to die by infection, so if I cause an infection now, it may be caught by my doctor at my physical. It will take a while for the infection to spread into my blood. It will be a slow, painful death, but I deserve it.

 

[the_inbetween]

I am giving myself until Tuesday. My plan is to die by infection, so if I cause an infection now, it may be caught by my doctor at my physical. It will take a while for the infection to spread into my blood. It will be a slow, painful death, but I deserve it.

That might be my way also. I ended up stabbing self in leg out of anger.

 

[squirtsoda]

I want to leave now, this instant, but I think as long as I feel queasy when I see people's names in grey and crossed out, I'm not ready.

This constant battle with myself is a horror show which is just as bad in itself as the rest of my life.

So how do people's names end up in grey, do they disable their accounts right before they CTB?

 

[galaticgrizzly]

That might be my way also. I ended up stabbing self in leg out of anger.

I'm just giving you a warning, any infection that spreads to your blood and kills you will be really, I mean, EXTREMELY painful. Not recommended if you have a low pain tolerance

That might be my way also. I ended up stabbing self in leg out of anger.

 

[the_inbetween]

I'm just giving you a warning, any infection that spreads to your blood and kills you will be really, I mean, EXTREMELY painful. Not recommended if you have a low pain tolerance

Thanks for the warning. My pain tolerance is moderate. But very high tolerance when I get angry.

 

[galaticgrizzly]

Thanks for the warning. My pain tolerance is moderate. But very high tolerance when I get angry.

I would not recommend this method. The only reason I am using it is because no other method has worked for me.

 

[squirtsoda]

I would not recommend this method. The only reason I am using it is because no other method has worked for me.

And you haven't looked in to SN?

 

[galaticgrizzly]

And you haven't looked in to SN?

I have no way to get it

 

[Conker]

not much longer..

 

[Time]

So how do people's names end up in grey, do they disable their accounts right before they CTB?

Sometimes people ban themselves, sometimes mods ban people after a period of time. Like on goodbye threads, when someone says they're about to go through with it & we don't hear from them for a while, mods will usually ban the account for security reasons.

 

[IvanK]

Hi
I am new here. I really like this site. English is not my first language. Excuse me for mistakes.
I have given myself atleast one and a half year more.
I had a childhood full of domestic violence. Grew up seeing my mom suffer every night at the hands of my father. I started having suicidal ideation since the age of 20. Back then I decided not to do it because it would have broken my mom's heart. She had been through a lot.

So I made a rule. I wouldn't CTB as long as someone was dependent on me, either emotionally, financially or some other way.

But then 5 years ago she died. It was a horrible death. She had a life full of suffering and then she died horribly. That was when I lost any hope in this world.
I have a sibling who is happily married. She doesn't need me. I have no friends who will miss me. Deliberately avoided making friends so noone would miss me. Now I am also avoiding even the few people I know. They call me selfish but i just want to make sure there will be as little impact as possible when i CTB.

Now nobody except my dog is dependent on me. He is already 15. He will probably live another year. I am making sure he is comfortable. He wouldn't be able to adjust with anyone if I go.

So I am 30 now. I have given myself 1 and a half year so that my last responsibility to my pet is fulfilled. Then I will be free to go without much impact. There will be some impact of course but I am making sure it won't be drastic.
In the mean time I am planning to travel and also buy a house in which I can CTB. I live in a rented place and I don't want to affect the landlord with my action. In my country, the property value drops if something like this happens in the house. So planning to take a loan, buy a nice little house where I can spend my last year. If I CTB, the bank will take possession of it.
This is my grand plan. :)

 

[Time]

Hi
I am new here. I really like this site. English is not my first language. Excuse me for mistakes.
I have given myself atleast one and a half year more.
I had a childhood full of domestic violence. Grew up seeing my mom suffer every night at the hands of my father. I started having suicidal ideation since the age of 20. Back then I decided not to do it because it would have broken my mom's heart. She had been through a lot.

So I made a rule. I wouldn't CTB as long as someone was dependent on me, either emotionally, financially or some other way.

But then 5 years ago she died. It was a horrible death. She had a life full of suffering and then she died horribly. That was when I lost any hope in this world.
I have a sibling who is happily married. She doesn't need me. I have no friends who will miss me. Deliberately avoided making friends so noone would miss me. Now I am also avoiding even the few people I know. They call me selfish but i just want to make sure there will be as little impact as possible when i CTB.

Now nobody except my dog is dependent on me. He is already 15. He will probably live another year. I am making sure he is comfortable. He wouldn't be able to adjust with anyone if I go.

So I am 30 now. I have given myself 1 and a half year so that my last responsibility to my pet is fulfilled. Then I will be free to go without much impact. There will be some impact of course but I am making sure it won't be drastic.
In the mean time I am planning to travel and also buy a house in which I can CTB. I live in a rented place and I don't want to affect the landlord with my action. In my country, the property value drops if something like this happens in the house. So planning to take a loan, buy a nice little house where I can spend my last year. If I CTB, the bank will take possession of it.
This is my grand plan. :)

Welcome, IvanK. Sorry to hear about your situation. But it looks like you've put a lot of thought into this so I hope that you get what you want & your plan comes to fruition.

 

[Terminally ill]

I have no way to get it

Why not? Where are u from?

 

[WhyIsLife56]

Might as just leave right now. I'm being pushed to the edge at the moment

 

[TAW122]

hey i'm doing mine in half a year too, need to wait till summer when i'm alone for a month. maybe we'll be catching the bus one after the other

Maybe so, it depends on many variables, such as finding the right place, timing, and also making sure nothing gets in the way during that time.

 

[jrums]

Sam

Right now I'm giving myself until late summer or early fall 2020. I dont know if I can make it but I'm trying for the sake of my family.

Same man

 

[galaticgrizzly]

Why not? Where are u from?

It's not a matter of where I'm from, it's that I still live with my parents and they check all packages

 

[Aleandra Felix]

I tried setting up dates and time frames. So far they didn't work. I'm planning on doing it February 8th but if I don't build up enough courage and motivation, my time frame is the beginning of this year. As someone else said, I'm just waiting for something to push me over the edge, carrying on with my routine and trying to sort out some stuffs in the meantime

 

[GinaIsReady]

I am hoping to leave within a month. I have a partner so two of us have to work out plans and we're just starting to talk about specific dates. But for myself, I could honestly go next week. It is hard to believe how ready I am to go.

 

[galaticgrizzly]

I am hoping to leave within a month. I have a partner so two of us have to work out plans and we're just starting to talk about specific dates. But for myself, I could honestly go next week. It is hard to believe how ready I am to go.

I want a partner too

 

[mesohappy]

Check into free emergency food box give aways where you live..I

Maybe soon. On top of everything else I now lost my income. And being hungry most of the time is adding to the other problems I have.

Maybe soon. On top of everything else I now lost my income. And being hungry most of the time is adding to the other problems I have.

You should check for food banks in your area if you haven't already..I went and hit a couple up this week.Got 5 full bags of food.Its not top shelf stuff exactly,but itll hold me for a little while.I dont plan on being around much longer and my appetite is pretty much been in the shitter lately anyway.