R
Raichu
An old head on young shoulders
- Jan 11, 2024
- 116
I guess the biggest paradox about loneliness is that you can be with everyone and still feel lonely and on the other hand you can be alone and yet not be lonely.
In my case however, loneliness is more like the universe, ever widening and ever expanding. I really cannot figure out what exactly is wrong. True, there have been various traumatic events in my life, but I never thought everything would spiral down to absolute nothingness. I keep pushing, indulging in studies, hobbies I like and hoping for the future; but there's this abyss I can never escape. Almost as if it's staring at me. It's more like a weird alloy of nihilism and absurdism. I know nothing matters yet everything seems to matter. It's not exactly a philosophical void I am experiencing but I really don't know how to convey what I am exactly feeling. I am here with my family, they have been toxic with me I admit. But there's also this fact that they had always tried to be by my side. And no I don't blame them for anything, but its just that nothing is making sense and what I feel is a deep void of nothingness. Not hopelessness, not sadness, nor anything just nothingness!
Anyone else here that goes through something similar?
In my case however, loneliness is more like the universe, ever widening and ever expanding. I really cannot figure out what exactly is wrong. True, there have been various traumatic events in my life, but I never thought everything would spiral down to absolute nothingness. I keep pushing, indulging in studies, hobbies I like and hoping for the future; but there's this abyss I can never escape. Almost as if it's staring at me. It's more like a weird alloy of nihilism and absurdism. I know nothing matters yet everything seems to matter. It's not exactly a philosophical void I am experiencing but I really don't know how to convey what I am exactly feeling. I am here with my family, they have been toxic with me I admit. But there's also this fact that they had always tried to be by my side. And no I don't blame them for anything, but its just that nothing is making sense and what I feel is a deep void of nothingness. Not hopelessness, not sadness, nor anything just nothingness!
Anyone else here that goes through something similar?