These days i talk only here. It's temporary. I do have a lot of respect to people here. As i say friend - i mean it as personal stuff. Not simply as people i can count on. There are too many people with interest to let me count on them.
work in complete isolation, without even a phone. I can't talk about work anywhere or with anyone. If someone asks(like family members) my answer is - Nobody knows... sadly it's true. I avoid this, but even if i get bored and decide to play the boss, i still won't let any of these people near my personal life. Any of them would trade me for quite a less and this can lead to very extreme events. So, i don't and most likely won't have any direct conversations in work. I had them only one time, few years ago, over controlled meetings and messaging, with very smart and trustworthy man. We got away only because of luck or some unknown coincidence to me.
People i cut so far this year:
I used to have some contacts at a coffee shop, since many years. Used to go there 3-4 times a week. Some of them considered "friends" Now, i don't want to go there and meet them ever again, and i won't. It's not a big deal.
A "friend" since high school time. One of my kids was very sick and was possible to be in the hospital with him for about a month, witch made his condition and my business organization critical. At the same time there was a car with two man, over middle age, talking for about 5-6 hour in there. I simply needed someone to call me for a spoof meeting, so check them out from the window. It was very important. My friend denied my request, saying he don't want to be involved with me. But he did not thought that way few hears ago sending me "funny" sms's about buses with white stuff, and some nicknames - i have nothing in common. He knew that my phone was probably taped. So i neglected the "jokes", but now he doesn't want to be involved, by simply calling me, from the other side of the country. Only because i know him from my childhood i decided to simply forget about his existence. Don't want to hear or see him again.
Parents - the only reason i might pick up the phone from them is to eventually let them see their grandchildren. Can't stand their company in years. They are not bad parents. I'm simply out of their world and understanding. Same for my sister, witch has actually f*cked me up a lot with his big mouth during the years, messing in my life. She was very aware of what she was doing actually. Really can't get over my recent past during the last 7-8 years with them. I really tried to keep up with them, and that was a big mistake.
As i draw the line i got 3 friends left. 2 of them left the country and we see each other once every 1-2 years. It will get worse in time actually. Everyone i know that is somehow smart or decapitated enough for me, don't live in my city or country.
I'm planning to retire soon anyway, place a mask and play successful, at least in front of the kids.
