Discussion How do you say "catch the bus" in everyday-speak?

[domedune]

I'm curious what language you all use. I'm talking about language that could be applied to all suicides (so not "they hung themselves") and is specifically regarding suicide (so not "they left this world").

Language I use:

• Someone "killed themselves".
• Someone "chose to die" or "chose death".
• Someone "ended their life".

I am pro-choice and believe suicide can be rational, which is why I prefer this language. Suicide will not be something that "happens to me" and I do not need to be saved from it. It will be my choice, which is why when I die, it'll be because I "killed myself". I can understand why others my disagree, and feel that suicide is something that will happen to them. That is a valid POV. I'm just talking about myself personally.

Language I avoid:

• Someone "took their own life".
• Someone "died by suicide".
• Someone "committed suicide".

I avoid "took their own life" because I don't like how it sounds. This might sound super callous, but "took their own life" sounds melodramatic to me. I prefer something more blunt. I avoid "died by suicide" because, like I said before, I don't like language that removes the agency of suicidal people. I avoid "committed suicide" because the word "commit" implies suicide is a crime, and where I live, it isn't. Even if it was a crime, I wouldn't use "committed suicide" because I don't believe suicide should be a crime.

I understand if most people don't care about this, but I find it interesting. What do you use? What are your thoughts?

 

[Rayzieka]

When I'm talking about it I usually say " they killed themselves " or if I'm talking to people who aren't offended easily I like to say
" they uninstalled life "

 

[lanax09]

I usually say they "offed themself" "or yeeted themself" if it's to someone who's alright with that kind of informal talk, otherwise just killed themself

 

[Makko]

When I'm talking about it I usually say " they killed themselves " or if I'm talking to people who aren't offended easily I like to say
" they uninstalled life "

Life is a lot like Samsung Pay, it's in your face all the time, you don't want it, and if you want to uninstall it you'd better be a hacker.

 

[Life_and_Death]

the word "commit" implies suicide is a crime

I don't understand this one. I can see where it comes from however by definition
"to carry into action deliberately", this is exactly what suicide is. Also that would mean a committed relationship implies its a crime to not cheat. I really think this one is just narrow mindedness of the word (not you, humans in general).
Of course the same can be said about the word love. "you love them then you must fuck them" cuz yeah incest is awesome. Wtf not all love is the same and just because they aren't family doesn't mean you can't love them. I love them like family I'm sorry other humans lack the understanding (sorry I went on a bit of a personal rant however I hope my point about the human language and the humans narrow mindedness towards certain words stuck)

 

[Sensei]

It should be taken into account that there are differences between languages. People from Iceland, Russia, Japan, and Brazil obviously express themselves differently. In my native language the most common expression is "commit suicide", or literally "commit self-murder".

 

[Bedrock48]

I try to say "died by suicide" to de-criminalise it but it's difficult to retrain your way of language sometimes. Took their own life seems second best, straight and to the point.

Talking about myself ill use whatever comes to mind tbh "sewerslide" "stop existing" etc etc. I find it difficult to speak so verbally and overtly about my suicidal ideation.

 

[FinalDestination]

I think I prefer died by suicide as it reads neutral and a factual statement and doesn't bring in with it whatever preconceptions the speaker may have over the act.

 

[demuic]

I'm curious what language you all use. I'm talking about language that could be applied to all suicides (so not "they hung themselves") and is specifically regarding suicide (so not "they left this world").

Language I use:

• Someone "killed themselves".
• Someone "chose to die" or "chose death".
• Someone "ended their life".

I am pro-choice and believe suicide can be rational, which is why I prefer this language. Suicide will not be something that "happens to me" and I do not need to be saved from it. It will be my choice, which is why when I die, it'll be because I "killed myself". I can understand why others my disagree, and feel that suicide is something that will happen to them. That is a valid POV. I'm just talking about myself personally.

Language I avoid:

• Someone "took their own life".
• Someone "died by suicide".
• Someone "committed suicide".

I avoid "took their own life" because I don't like how it sounds. This might sound super callous, but "took their own life" sounds melodramatic to me. I prefer something more blunt. I avoid "died by suicide" because, like I said before, I don't like language that removes the agency of suicidal people. I avoid "committed suicide" because the word "commit" implies suicide is a crime, and where I live, it isn't. Even if it was a crime, I wouldn't use "committed suicide" because I don't believe suicide should be a crime.

I understand if most people don't care about this, but I find it interesting. What do you use? What are your thoughts?

I say killed themselves or committed suicide. Though commit does have the association with a crime, all it literally means is to "to do or perform." You can "commit" an act of kindness.

"Died by suicide" I also don't like because it sounds as if "suicide" is some mysterious killer instead of it being the circumstances of life which drives a person to suicide. It reminds me of the type of people who always want to "raise awareness" or change their language in a superficial way but never actually do any concrete action that will help someone in the real world (aka slacktivism).

 

[newave3]

You could say " They ended it all. ". "They pulled the plug on themselves. " " They self destructed. "

That last one makes us sound like we are a missile that can explode in case of malfunction. Lucky missile.

 

[FuneralCry]

I've always liked to refer to suicide as 'they ended their own suffering'. I guess I like this as I see suicide as a way to gain freedom from the pain that this life brings. I would say they 'died by suicide' rather than killed themselves for me as the word kill is associated with murder which is an involuntary action and it sounds too harsh for what suicide is, freeing ourselves from pain.

 

[Misfit72]

I'd say 'to take your own life' or more colloquially, 'to top yourself'. I dislike 'die by suicide', although it's not a new term at all, as Abraham Lincoln used it, but the word 'commit' does not necessarily mean a sin or a crime, as you can also "commit an error".

 

[WornOutLife]

Haha I use a lot an argentine slang which goes like this: "Borrarme del mapa!!" which means something like "Erase myself from the map!!"

 

[domedune]

the word 'commit' does not necessarily mean a sin or a crime, as you can also "commit an error".

I haven't heard it used in that sense, but I'm sure it can. Also, an error is still negative.

"Commit" is generally used negatively, often to refer to sins or crimes, which is why I avoid it, but I acknowledge its literal meaning.

 

[Misfit72]

I haven't heard it used in that sense, but I'm sure it can. Also, an error is still negative.

"Commit" is generally used negatively, often to refer to sins or crimes, which is why I avoid it, but I acknowledge its literal meaning.

What's wrong with being negative? I want to end my life because I've been a failure in it, how is that positive? I use 'commit' more in a historical sense, and avoid using it with people who've taken their lives more recently - I've haven't really met anyone bereaved by suicide but would just referred to their family member or friend dying.

 

[domedune]

What's wrong with being negative? I want to end my life because I've been a failure in it, how is that positive?

You can see your own suicide however you want. If it's negative, that's fine. I don't use "commit" due to people usually using it to describe a wrongdoing (someone committed a offense, a sin, etc.), and I don't think suicide is a wrongdoing.

Though, commit doesn't only have to be used in that sense, but I rarely, if ever, heard it not used in that sense. I'm looking at a few online dictionaries right now and all the example sentences contain words like murder, error, crime, sin, adultery, etc.

Which is tangential, because your question was, "What's wrong with being negative?" Nothing wrong if that's how you feel about it.

 

[Celerity]

I usually say "kicked the bucket" or "offed themselves".

 

[Misfit72]

Though, commit doesn't only have to be used in that sense, but I rarely, if ever, heard it not used in that sense. I'm looking at a few online dictionaries right now and all the example sentences contain words like murder, error, crime, sin, adultery, etc.

In case you didn't click on the list of examples of 'commit an error', here it is again - https://www.google.com/search?q="commit+an+error"&rlz=1C1CHBF_enGB842GB842&source=lnms&tbm=bks&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwjXt7XloeDwAhX6wAIHHbncAvkQ_AUoAXoECAEQCw&biw=1366&bih=625

It's best to rely on actual usage as a guide rather than on just what a dictionary says, and wrong doesn't necessarily mean 'immoral'. Admittedly, 'commit an error' sounds like something a lawyer would say in a court case, or something you'd say in a Romance language, like cometer un error in Spanish or cometer um erro, which means 'make a mistake'.

However, unlike other Germanic languages, English uses a word derived from Latin, whereas German uses Selbstmord, Dutch zelfmoord and Danish selvmord, and if people don't want taking their own lives to be equated to homicide, genocide or infanticide, maybe we should ditch 'suicide' as a term as well.

When I told a Samaritans volunteer at my local branch that my Mum died young, it wouldn't have angered me any more than it did if he'd said 'committed' suicide rather than 'died by' suicide because it was such a loaded question, arrogant and presumptuous. He should have said 'how did she die?' instead. For the record she died of cancer, or should that be 'by' cancer?

Anyway, each to their own.

 

[saltshaker]

getting wacked
wacking yourself
taking a dirt nap
clickity clack, brahp brahp
meeting your maker
drinking that koolaid

 

[theresonlyonewayout]

Is at peace now or killed themselves/kill myself

 

[LONE WOLF.]

I've always gone with 'They've kicked the bucket'!!!

 

[Sprite_Geist]

From personal experience: the phrase/term "committed suicide" tends to be used by the media, presumably because it sounds more formal than some of the alternatives. When suicide is being talked about informally, such as with acquaintances or friends, "killed themselves" is more common.

 

[domedune]

In case you didn't click on the list of examples of 'commit an error', here it is again - https://www.google.com/search?q="commit+an+error"&rlz=1C1CHBF_enGB842GB842&source=lnms&tbm=bks&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwjXt7XloeDwAhX6wAIHHbncAvkQ_AUoAXoECAEQCw&biw=1366&bih=625

It's best to rely on actual usage as a guide rather than on just what a dictionary says, and wrong doesn't necessarily mean 'immoral'. Admittedly, 'commit an error' sounds like something a lawyer would say in a court case, or something you'd say in a Romance language, like cometer un error in Spanish or cometer um erro, which means 'make a mistake'.

However, unlike other Germanic languages, English uses a word derived from Latin, whereas German uses Selbstmord, Dutch zelfmoord and Danish selvmord, and if people don't want taking their own lives to be equated to homicide, genocide or infanticide, maybe we should ditch 'suicide' as a term as well.

When I told a Samaritans volunteer at my local branch that my Mum died young, it wouldn't have angered me any more than it did if he'd said 'committed' suicide rather than 'died by' suicide because it was such a loaded question, arrogant and presumptuous. He should have said 'how did she die?' instead. For the record she died of cancer, or should that be 'by' cancer?

Anyway, each to their own.

I used "commit an error" as an example of negative usage, which you quoted in your comment, so I don't know what you linked that again.

I am relying on actual usage, which is why I said in my previous comments that I've rarely, if ever, heard people use "commit" to describe someone doing something other than a wrongdoing (error, crime, sin, etc.).

To each their own.

 

[motel rooms]

They ate their Freedom Fries

 

[nolongerhuman]

"Committed suicide". "Died by suicide" to people who have made it clear that they strongly prefer that particular phrase. "Yeeted themselves from this mortal coil" when in a particular mood.

 

[everydayiloveyou]

I usually say "killed themselves" but I've used all of those other phrases.

I'm also pro-choice and I completely agree that "killed themself" and "ended their life" makes the most sense to me. I also prefer "committed suicide" and "took their own life" for the same reason. I agree that the latter can sound really dramatic, but it fits certain contexts.

I understand why "died by suicide" is used, but I find it so silly. Most people say it that way for mental illness awareness reasons, right? So why don't we say "this person killed themselves, they had been dealing with major depression for decades before they died," "they commited suicide and did not leave a note or any warning, during a manic episode," "they died of a heart attack likely induced by their anorexia," etc? Why say "died by suicide" as if suicide is the illness? Even though in most cases, suicidal ideation is the symptom? It's so weird to me.

I also dislike when an obvious suicide is referred to vaguely, like "a celebrity has died. they died of a gun wound. No one else was in the home. Police have determined there was no foul play." Just say they shot themselves, damn. Anyone planning to do a copycat has all of the information they need already. Maybe if people are committing suicide at the same time as their favorite celebrity, we should focus on getting them help and treating their extreme cases of mental illness early. I know that changing the headlines reduces copycat suicides by a statistically significant amount, but I feel like the real issue is getting buried. There shouldn't be so many people so close to the edge that seeing a headline gives them that last bit of resolve.

 

[Shadowrider]

Sometimes I euphemize by saying "to do the deed" or "doing oneself in".
At other times, I use the term "to erase oneself".

 

[Weary Soul]

I say committed suicide.

I think to say CTB - is a way to put a (sighs - trouble finding word - TBI strikes again)... a way to make it sound not as stark as the reality of suicide is.

When I think of CTB - my mind immediately goes to harry potter - and that is a nice way to think of it.. and there is nothing really nice about the reality of suicide.

Maybe saying CTB is a way to make it a bit more palatable? That being said - I do not think there is anything palatable about suicide. And of course, Just my opinion.

 

[avoid_slow_death]

I usually say the "passed" or "passed away". My mom was a nurse, and this is the terminology they often use when informing others of a death regardless of the nature.

 

[Amumu]

I'm still a big fan of "opting out", I find it funny and relevant at the same time.