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kyleq16

kyleq16

Member
Mar 3, 2019
22
Hello I want to ctb but I try partial hanging but my survival instinct stops me from going through with it. I cant seem to find a way to fight my survival instinct can anyone here relate or give me some advice because I'm so confused.
 
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L

LivingToLong

Experienced
Feb 23, 2019
259
I'm not sure that you can. I think anything that prevented (or lessened) your survival instinct might also hinder your ability to ctb. That is, short of some method that effectively did the 2 things at the same time, e.g. a bullet to the head.

The survival instinct is primitive, you cannot control it is such.
 
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kyleq16

kyleq16

Member
Mar 3, 2019
22
oh okay thanks anyway
 
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21Neberg

21Neberg

Enlightened
Dec 17, 2018
1,624
oh okay thanks anyway

I face this issue too. It's so incredibly hard. I think that we simply need to try over and over again and go a bit further every time. Until eventually, we can get so close to death that we can CTB by hanging whenever we want.
If I ever find out on how to overcome this instinct, I'll let you know. But for now, I'm in the same shoes as you.
 
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O

Olach

Student
Feb 4, 2019
113
Besides me, survival instinct is very strong in hanging, jumping, cutting the veins. But with firearms or pills, you have much more control over it.
 
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R

Roberto

Wizard
Jan 19, 2019
684
Hello I want to ctb but I try partial hanging but my survival instinct stops me from going through with it. I cant seem to find a way to fight my survival instinct can anyone here relate or give me some advice because I'm so confused.
Did you try with diazepam and or having a pair of drinks with alcohol?
 
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Sarainia Angelsong

Sarainia Angelsong

Female, Earth, Depressed
Mar 7, 2019
56
My plan is to one day have a setup where I shackle my feet and hands, kick the stand out from under me and just Hang hopefully breaking my neck and rupturing any major Veins/Arteries to my brain in the process! Currently I'm not lucky to have a setup even remotely close to as described, and I always had wished I can somehow find a better setup than what I have now, as my setup lots of people say is risky longside the constant half hour checks! But I will find a way I know i will...
 
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Chlo

Chlo

Experienced
Feb 17, 2019
213
I have dreams of me about to kill myself and shaking uncontrollably, not sure if it's my subconscious trying to lessen my SI or what. Don't think there's much you can do...booze might help a bit.
 
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F

F_ckthisplace

Member
Feb 26, 2019
54
Your situation needs to be so shit that you don't care
 
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Jake.123

Jake.123

Member
Feb 18, 2019
63
Get drunk or take other drugs, tie your hands together, take a sleeping pill. There are many ways to take the control out of your hands
 
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Deivis

Deivis

Seul contre tous
Jul 23, 2018
235
Hello I want to ctb but I try partial hanging but my survival instinct stops me from going through with it. I cant seem to find a way to fight my survival instinct can anyone here relate or give me some advice because I'm so confused.

Start an argument with your family. The most insulting, abusive argument that you can do. Make them yell the most horrible things at you. A lot of people keep it deep inside and would never verbalize it, but this situation will force them to reveal their true self.

It helps.
 
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Ashpac

Ashpac

Lost and always will be.
Jul 22, 2018
795
Hello I want to ctb but I try partial hanging but my survival instinct stops me from going through with it. I cant seem to find a way to fight my survival instinct can anyone here relate or give me some advice because I'm so confused.

When the will to die becomes greater than the will to live. (I hate survival Instinct) I was all prepared the other night, then couldnt go through with it, thats why i didnt make the thread about my SN trip.

Awesome profile picture btw. I love Tupac.
 
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deathplease

deathplease

waiting to die
Feb 16, 2019
124
I am in the same boat. It's awful, isn't it? I tried hanging last night & I had the same problem. I had everything prepared & still couldn't follow through. I wish you the best of luck, & hope you find peace.
 
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Salvacion

Salvacion

Member
Sep 25, 2018
88
I have to find a way to overcome today...... it's so difficult. If only there were a pill for this
 
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V

Volomori83

Haunted by the ghosts of the past
Jul 9, 2018
126
What I've used most of my partial hanging practices for is to try and trick the brain in to thinking it is just a test, this way I make myself believe I have control over the situation. Ive found this to be quite effective. Pushing myself further and further each time. I've nearly passed out a number of times this way, releasing myself only because I've a few loose ends to tidy up, after which I'm ending it.

I'm now pretty confident I can keep the brain occupied until I pass out. Of course, only time will tell.
 
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Deivis

Deivis

Seul contre tous
Jul 23, 2018
235
What I've used most of my partial hanging practices for is to try and trick the brain in to thinking it is just a test

Exactly. I'm just few minutes back from my partial training session (lost count), still have running nose, but this time its slightly better. The trick is to do it in a quiet, comfy place and without any fuss. Very slowly, cm by cm, probing every spot.

To OP: My SI is long gone, but if you do it for prolonged period of time, your fear will subside. Your mind gets familiar with each new lap. I'm not one of the lucky ones who succeed immediately - just as everything in this life - nothing is free. Blood, sweat, tears is the default option. But you'll get over your fear, I'm pretty sure.
 
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G

Goldentwenty

Member
Feb 7, 2019
21
Hello I want to ctb but I try partial hanging but my survival instinct stops me from going through with it. I cant seem to find a way to fight my survival instinct can anyone here relate or give me some advice because I'm so confused.
Like someone else said on a different thread,..... Booze.
U can overcome SI with booze.
Only u have to still have some clarity at the time obviously.
 
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Jiva

Jiva

I want ...
Nov 18, 2018
492
I know this probleme very well. I tried it many times. I think, the one way is use a way, where escape does not exist and the start is easy (the complete hanging - maybe with handcuffs, bullet into head). I don´t have a courage to jump, but it is also a way. It suffices to have a courage for start. Because the survival instinct comes step by step, not suddenly. Partial suspension can be simply interupted, it isn´t any way for me.
 
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fastFWD

fastFWD

running out of time...
Feb 12, 2019
152
Hello I want to ctb but I try partial hanging but my survival instinct stops me from going through with it. I cant seem to find a way to fight my survival instinct can anyone here relate or give me some advice because I'm so confused.

ah that faint glimmer of hope/rush of adrenaline/sudden stream of what-ifs that seem to plague our minds in the 11th hour; imo, our SI.

what helps curb my SI is a combination of very emotional/sad music playing in the background while my mind replays/creates insanely depressing and hopeless past/present/future images/scenarios within itself.

i believe, however, that it is very personal on what will drive each of us to go over the edge and defeat our instinct to live on.

now this goes for everyone here; all things being said i hope you can overcome whatever battle(s) you are fighting and that you continue to find light in your darkest hour(s) - meaning your SI continues to kick in - because that means you still have hope lingering in your mind imo.

nevertheless, I feel that once all hope is truly lost (and you've really tried everything to turn things around without doubt) you will be better able to move forward with your plans to ctb. However, until then we can be hopelessly hoping together.
 
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suffering

suffering

Too p*ssy to end it, too suicidal to leave
Aug 17, 2018
398
I can't do it neither and I am convinced I never will. So I guess plan B for me is to just live and eventually die by natural causes. Facing my survival instinct was one of the most (maybe actually the most) terrible moments of my life. Took me months to even begin to feel 'normal' again, I was so devastated.
Anyway I am sorry you are going through this and I hope you find peace, regardless if you live or not.

Edit: Holy cow, I just noticed I have a 'Veteran' status :( I've been dragging this dead horse around for too long. Unable to die, and yet unable to stop lurking here...
 
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kyleq16

kyleq16

Member
Mar 3, 2019
22
Did you try with diazepam and or having a pair of drinks with alcohol?
I think you need a prescription to get diazepam and Im not the legal age to by alcohol so i dont think that is an option for me at the moment
When the will to die becomes greater than the will to live. (I hate survival Instinct) I was all prepared the other night, then couldnt go through with it, thats why i didnt make the thread about my SN trip.

Awesome profile picture btw. I love Tupac.
I can relate to you with not going through with it when everything is prepared and thanks, I love that album from eminem
 
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Ch92921

Ch92921

The call of the void
Dec 29, 2018
909
Besides me, survival instinct is very strong in hanging, jumping, cutting the veins. But with firearms or pills, you have much more control over it.
no
I know this probleme very well. I tried it many times. I think, the one way is use a way, where escape does not exist and the start is easy (the complete hanging - maybe with handcuffs, bullet into head). I don´t have a courage to jump, but it is also a way. It suffices to have a courage for start. Because the survival instinct comes step by step, not suddenly. Partial suspension can be simply interupted, it isn´t any way for me.
no not true. Because of SI you wont be able to close the handcuffs on both arms. You wont be able to put the trigger of the gun,neither.
IMO its not the methode, it is SI's fault.
 
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A

Allegory

Member
Sep 10, 2018
24
Is anyone familiar with the Interpersonal-Psychological Theory of Suicidal Behavior? If so, what do you think of it?

It proposes that "an individual will not die by suicide unless s/he has both the desire to die by suicide and the ability to do so." People who have the desire to die perceive themselves to be a burden and feel alienated from others/socially isolated. However, people who are capable of overcoming the survival instinct and successfully killing themselves are those who have been repeatedly exposed to pain, injury, and death. Suicide is more common in occupations (e.g. physician, soldier) that give repeated exposure to pain and injury. It's also more common in people with anorexia nervosa, who expose themselves to pain through starvation for long periods of time. It's the deadliest eating disorder but the majority of deaths are from suicide not starvation.

If you look at the statistics, most people who want to die don't attempt and the vast majority of people who attempt aren't successful. Suicidal ideation alone is not a good indicator of who will complete suicide.

I have been suicidal for over a decade but I think that the reason why I'm not dead yet is because I don't have that "acquired ability to enact lethal self-injury." I want to work on developing it to overcome my survival instinct.
 
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Deivis

Deivis

Seul contre tous
Jul 23, 2018
235
Is anyone familiar with the Interpersonal-Psychological Theory of Suicidal Behavior? If so, what do you think of it?

I have been suicidal for over a decade but I think that the reason why I'm not dead yet is because I don't have that "acquired ability to enact lethal self-injury." I want to work on developing it to overcome my survival instinct.

Interesting. Have you actually tried or made any preparations? When you walk by the BBQ shelf in a mall, for example.
I'm waiting for the warm weather to come, the required stuff (coals, buckets, tent) is already within the reach in my local store. Not scary at all.
 
9137890

9137890

Member
Aug 21, 2019
88
My overcoming SI plan:
  • Don't imagine that there is nothing, even if you think there will be nothing don't imagine it. Instead imagine that you will be in a beautiful place.
  • Do if you don't want to ctb speak with yourself and say "I don't want to ctb I just want to try something and there will be no pain".
  • Don't think too much, be a little impulsive as more you think it gets just worse.

This won't go overnight it will need a little practice and time.
 
S

suicideintended

Exhausted
May 6, 2020
9
I think survival Instinct is primitive. But we're all on this site and something brought us here.. I think eventually I will become more comfortable once my method and plan are in place. I think the survival Instinct will be there regardless. But logically and properly planning it will make me more comfortable and familiar with ctb. That's My Hope anyway... I think it boils down to this for me, it's not just about wanting to die or not.. I literally cannot do this ...survive..in this world anymore. And I feel like if someone truly means that, the survival Instinct can be ignored long enough to finish. And as I said I'm hoping that logically and properly planning my method will help ease some of the anxiety.
 
9137890

9137890

Member
Aug 21, 2019
88
I still think my plan can work because I had already a failed attempt and I know SI is not easy to overcome but it's possible. The most essential part is to convince yourself that this is a good thing and delete all thoughts on consequences, at least at my attempt it worked.
 

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