how do I find a girlfriend?

[dune7263]

I used to speak with this girl but I forgot her instagram

 

[Forveleth]

Find people that have similar interests as you. Spend time with them. Make friends. The best partners come from friends you can share something with. Do not force it.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

Find a dimensional portal to the Harry Potter world and acquire a Felix Felicis potion then drink it until it eventually works in getting you a girlfriend. Either that or smoke a ton of four-leaf clovers to further enhance your luck because that's literally all it takes.

 

[KillingPain267]

The later inevitable breakup is not worth it

 

[Haematemesis]

find people with common interests
find places to meet those people with commin interests
befriend some
flirt subtlely
if she flirts back go on
if she backs off back off
best case scenario you get a gf
worst case scenario you get a friend

honestly talking to someone with the first intention of dating seems weird to me

 

[EvisceratedJester]

Be tall and have a mogger face

^ Don't have this guy's attitude. Most women find this kind of shit unappealing

 

[menheraboy]

i started off with my girlfriend by being her best friend, we grew closer and closer. basiccally i waited for the first time she flirted and i did it back, until i finally confessed

 

[ramon]

Look, @dune7263 , I might sound painfully cliché, but here goes: You don't need to find a girlfriend. You just need to become the best version of yourself.

I've read from a fair amount of guys who are in a situation similar to yours, so I'll include the answer I would give to most these guys (including myself when I was young):

For appearances, assuming that you're broke, go to online communities (specially YouTube) related to seduction and hand pick everything you need to LOOK your best (hygiene, exercising, grooming, and fashion). You don't need to become an underwear model overnight! You just need to pick up the attitude of a man who LEGITIMATELY wants to become better by the day. Girls can detect that attitude and that makes them interested in you (Not attracted to you, but it's a good start).

For confidence, read Rollo Tomassi's "The Rational Male". This book will teach you not to chase women, but to chase that self love we all must have before being loved by others.

For relationship skills, I don't recommend most of the ideas provided by the online seduction community. Instead, get the following type of books or videos and figure out a way to ingrain part of these materials into you modus operandi:

*. One book on negotiation (Similar to Chriss Voss's "Never Split The Difference").
*. One book on persuasion (Similar to Patrick King's "Persuasion Tactics" or R.B. Sparkman's "The Art Of Manipulation").
*. A short video or two on JUST approaching women in public without being creepy (This is the exception to my prevention towards online seduction advice).
*. One book on intention detection (Similar to David J. Lieberman's "Never Be Lied To Again").

Q: ¡¡¿¿TOO MUCH HARD WORK??!!
A: Please let me know about anybody who became good at relationships in a year or two. Even the legitimate lady's man learnt what he knows in a decade or two by improving his game via trial and error, and by stop giving a monkey's butt about getting rejected by a thousand women.

Q: ¡¡¿¿WILL I TURN 99 BY THE TIME I MASTER ALL THIS CRAP??!!
A: You can spend your whole life trying to get women, get zero results, and still tell yourself "I tried the HARDEST and that's why I'm proud of myself"; or you can spend decades blaming others (in this case, women) for your failures... like I did in the past... DON'T REPEAT MY MISTAKE!!!

Q: ¡¡¿¿WHAT GUARANTEES I HAVE THAT THIS CRAP WILL EVER WORK??!!
A: Chances are you'll never get the girl of your dreams; but, in the process, you became the man you always wanted to be. The kind of man who needs nobody (even girls) to enjoy every new day. The kind of man who can choose to be happy around women or to be happy all by himself. Again, women can detect that and can't help feel attracted to that.

Q: ¡¡¡BUT I FEEL LONELY!!! ¡¡¡ I NEED TO HAVE SOMEONE NEXT TO ME, RIGHT NOW!!! ¡¡¡I FEEL LIKE I'M WASTING MY YOUTH!!!
A: I say it's a good deal to forfeit company in your 20s in favor of becoming that someone you admire and would like to become, so that your 30s and 40s will become the most memorable decades of your life. Besides, as you age, your testosterone levels decrease to a point in which your emotions will no longer take control over you as they usually do in your 20s, therefore making your perception of life more enjoyable.

Look at all this process as a video-game: You'll lose a million times, and as you get defeated one try after another, you'll figure out what works in order to finish this challenge. Persistance is key.

Another useful cliché here: What makes this fun is not undressing her body. What really makes this fun is undressing her mind... and you didn't even had to touch her.

At least let me know if what I've told is just a bunch of rubbish.

Take care.

 

[Subhumano]

Thats the question Ive been asking myself for a very long time

 

[notrllycherub]

aside the obvious, from going out to trying to meet people with similair interests, please do not start speaking with girls with the intention of dating them. hear me out.

if you like someone then obviously you're going to want to get to know them. but sliding in a girl's DMs and letting her immidiately know that you want to date her will propably throw her off. there are a lot of creeps out there, hearing from a guy she barely knows that he likes her puts a lot of pressure on her. that's why a lot of girls, including me, decide to just ignore those texts.

do not rush it, be casual and talk with those girls the same way you would talk with a friend. being your authentic self is propably the best thing you could do if you want to get a girlfriend. remember that building such and intimate and close relationship takes a lot of time and effort. i wish it was easier, but it really is not, rushing it won't help you. if the girl likes you she will let you know, it really is not as complicated as it seems. just remember to treat her like a normal person and do not listen those weird red pill guys.

 

[Apathy79]

I met the girl I later got engaged to walking the dog one day. I'd be surprised if that doesn't still work. Dogs like to play with each other. Then you're together watching them, it's weird not to chat. If you walk your dogs in the same place long enough, you're going to have a friend at least.

I think people try to make it too complicated these days.

 

[NonEssential]

Some people say just be yourself, but I find it to be terrible advice when it's directed towards me.
When people say making friends, relationships, getting a job is simple it all just makes me want to hang myself even more for being unable to complete so called simple tasks.

 

[Zoro1029]

Look into events in your community where you can learn a skill/try a new hobby. Cooking classes or art classes are ones Ive wanted to do in the past. Dont go into these things with the sole intention of finding a partner you should be somewhat invested in the activity.

 

[CeaseExist]

I think that @ramon said the most that had to be said. Give Ramon a cookie for that.

I will add to that something more about state of mind - Be a person that wants a girlfriend, that when you are around people they should feel invited, to interact with you, to respond. Go out into the world expecting that you will connect with someone, not in an arrogant, seething way, but more in positive "I'm ready for someone becoming one with me, and I becoming one with them". Be mindful of other people's reactions and responses to you, don't garner any negative feelings if they either reject you, or "lead you on" as in some cases people feel like that, because humans are messy, imperfect, they make mistakes, everyone of us, so be prepared that other people will inevitably read your intentions wrong, or fumble in dialogue. It doesn't necessarily mean anything in particular, unless you can see and sense intention behind it.

Furthermore I'd like to suggest a very simplified framework as to what do:
1. Get to know them - take it slow, exchange names, make small talk especially positive one, like joking about things you mutually know, everything in the vicinity of you is a good thing to hook attention to. If you aren't a joking type, do your thing, but remember, you are not there to fight demons, or to fucking impregnate her instantly, you are there to build connection
2. After getting to know each other a bit better and they've shown positive reception, ask for any way to keep in touch if they want to also - everything really depends on what kind of person they are, and how well you are mixing together. Sometimes you may never reach the opportunity to exchange contact, and sometimes it will happen almost instantly, nobody knows, everyone is different.
3. You've done the base work, the foundation of human connection these days, you have her contact, depending on what kind of person YOU are, contact her immediately or after some time, although if you want a girlfriend I suggest establishing that contact almost instantly, even when still standing with her, write her some fun fact about wombats. Remember also, to give space, this is a whole other human being you are talking to, they have life, their own thoughts etc. Your goal isn't to grasp someone's life hard and straighten it up, then shove it up your ass for your own satisfaction, it's to observe, get to know, feel the other person and feel yourself how well you think this person sticks to you.
4. that's the point where everything is up to you and her, there isn't any objective truth that can be said about building relationships, other than different perspectives. The more objective shit I could tell, I already expressed: Be mindful, caring, positive, inviting, perceptive - but most of all - BE SINCERE. Be honest, tell her that you are actually looking for a girlfriend, don't keep it a secret, and if you aren't looking for anything else, and you aren't a pokemon collector like me, don't feel bad about abandoning that contact if things go sideways. Although personally I like to always start out with people as friends and just seeing where it would go from there.

Another thing I'd like to stress out is about being sincere - if you aren't actually interested in that person, if their stories bore you to death, if you don't care about how they felt at school, work etc. if you can't spend time with them without feeling strained after some time, then please DON'T. Don't try to force it to work, it won't, and albeit I understand completely the wanting, the longing, you will only hurt the other person, even much more than you will get in the process of not being sincere, to her and to yourself.

There is much much more to actually talk about, but we would have to sit for hours and talk it out, and forums aren't perfect for that, and even right now it all turned into some worthless wall of text that doesn't convey the understanding and experience fully, like for example "manifest that you want a girlfriend" - how the fuck do you explain it just by text....

As for the more grounded part, fuck if I know where to find a girlfriend, I didn't date being an adult yet, and I don't think I will. I've actually hooked up with my long time (now ex) gf through fucking messenger, while being a teenager so can't really share any experiences there as I have none.

Also REMEMBER TO TALK ABOUT WOMBATS - not a lot, not too few, just enough to raise the awareness about them and their habitats and their square shits - and then slap them with adoption kit.
Actually know what? YOU adopt a wombat, and then give your to be girlfriend the plushie.
Also, one thing I forgot to add again: F L I R T with her, I've seen guys grab attention of girls and straight up forgetting to flirt...then ending up looking like some uninterested activists or religious missionaries.
Oh yeah, also there is time and place for flirting - The only thing I know when the time is right, is just by judging their reactions, and basically if you are within "free time-zone" or not. Don't flirt if the atmosphere isn't relaxed, it will end badly very often, basically focus on her, match the vibe, be interested in her.................

 

[TheLightOfMyLife]

Be born physically attractive, tall, and white.

 

[other-ghost]

Be friends (not best friend, it'll hurt more when you break up), fall for her, test the water by flirting a bit, flirt HIGHKEY, confess.

That's what i did, at least.

 

[TheLightOfMyLife]

^ Don't have this guy's attitude. Most women find this kind of shit unappealing

Women don't give a fuck about the attitude. The attitude only matters when you're ugly as fuck and look like shit. Then they tell you it's your attitude in order to justify the hatred which they already felt because of your looks.

Women want men who are tall, white, with masculine model-esque faces. If you have that, in the exact same manner as before, they will use your actions to justify their love for you.

If you're ugly and you're nice? You're too creepy and desperate
If you're hot and you're nice? You're so sweet and kind

Ugly and mean? You're a horrible bitter little loser
Hot and mean? You're a bad boy and exciting.

Quit with the normie gaslighting and get a clue dude.

 

[moonflow3r]

just be urself ppl will like you. (or not)

 

[CeaseExist]

Oh great, is this really one of those forums where they push the meme that your "personality" and attitude matters for dating?
Actual fucking lol.
You all need to get real and understand that it has next to nothing with who you are, but WHAT you are. It's about being born the right way.

Being born a woman? You can always find love.
Born tall and white? You can always find love.

Born black, ugly, and below 6 feet? Good fucking luck kid.

It doesn't make the slightest difference if you have a "positive" attitude or not. Hilarious to hear that from this site btw, I would have thought you of all people would understand how stupid that line of thought is.

I am sorry life treated you in a way that made this outlook your main compass in relations.

Sure, physical attractiveness is in fact important, but nobody said anything that says otherwise actually. In this day and age, many people who ask for advice such as this, most of the time lack even the most basic foundations to create a relationship in the first place. That is I think, because they've never had the drive themselves, and nobody pushed them to go out and learn the hard way, to get experience in relationships.

Another thing, is personality a meme to you? is attitude not important you think? Do you believe that if you were acting all pretentious and aggressive you could get out of speeding ticket? Do you think if you come up to group of people and be angry at everything, only complain and throw judgments left and right they would feel okay in your company?

Physical looks aren't everything, they are part of a much, much bigger picture that a lot of people these days reject, don't know why, be it insecurity, fear - the most important thing is - yeah, if your personality is flat, and you are constantly angry at everything, have some inner sense that everything and everyone owes you, and have almost verging on paranoid conviction that our reality is as simple as few words thrown in the wind, then yeah, this statement becomes believable - it helps you sleep at night right? It's not your responsibility, you were born ugly. It's not your responsibility, everyone else has too high of expectations right? It's not your responsibility, 99% of women actively chase 0.0000001% mythical males.

Feel free to feel attacked, as you probably will anyway, but please, please - "one look outside the window" and what you stated is disproved. Have you watched people around you? Do you feel like everyone who you see, is in relationship because they are height of beauty and have perfect body builds?

Physical looks - the genetical ones - apply only to one specific thing in broad summary: Preferences. It's not be-all-end-all. Sure, if you are ugly you will have bad time here on earth, but most people aren't objectively ugly, and I will assume, that you yourself may count yourself amidst the legion of the ugly ones - since you have pretty negative attitude towards this topic.

But know this, if you show yourself, and you aren't objectively ugly, you should actually feel bad for what you are doing, to others and to YOURSELF. If you are, then too bad, nothing you can change so might as well not be a negative energy syphon and enjoy life as much as you can.

but sure, you have to be a billionaire to have a girlfriend, and be 6ft10 tall white chadwick bonzo, with 10 inches package and 100kgs of muscles, a perfectly designed piece of art by Michaelangelo - personality is a fake construct.

PS: You might still scoff at the idea, regarding your absurdly aggressive attitude towards personality, but try looking in the mirror, you might actually see something.

Peace
Also, please unlock your profile for people to see - I always love that negative people like you radiate their own insecurity everywhere, even some far off forum on the internet, what are you afraid of people seeing?

Just a thought :)

 

[rabidbunny]

Oh great, is this really one of those forums where they push the meme that your "personality" and attitude matters for dating?
Actual fucking lol.
You all need to get real and understand that it has next to nothing with who you are, but WHAT you are. It's about being born the right way.

Being born a woman? You can always find love.
Born tall and white? You can always find love.

Born black, ugly, and below 6 feet? Good fucking luck kid.

It doesn't make the slightest difference if you have a "positive" attitude or not. Hilarious to hear that from this site btw, I would have thought you of all people would understand how stupid that line of thought is.

This is so stupid and it's actually you who needs to join the real world. Im 5'7 and most men I meet happen to be my height or shorter. I've happily dated them because who tf cares? Ive also only been with one white man and he was latino, everyone else has been a man of color, brown, black, indigenous. Not that it matters tbh, just trying to show you not everyone is exclusively attracted to white men or tall men. Some of them were considered more attractive than the others according to my friends or society's standards but it didnt make me love them any more or less and they were attractive to ME. what i truly loved was their ability to make me laugh, making them laugh, seeing the way their faces lit up when they spoke about their hobbies and interests, their imperfections. Their bodies and appearances were just a plus and not the main reason i didnt or did seek them out. ofc attraction does matter and is really important in a relationship but what is attractive to you may not be attractive to me and vice versa. NONE OF US ARE PERFECT!!! im sorry that you feel this way about yourself and i dont doubt that as a man of color, people have been cruel to you but there are people who would love you if you just let them. this mindset is unattractive in itself and keeping you alone . stop falling for the rage theyre baiting you with.

 

[CeaseExist]

This is so stupid...

@TheLightOfMyLife yeah, +1 Bunny

I just wanted to add, that I got angry, I truly did, but not towards you, no - at you, and not because of what you currently believe in, but because how you put yourself down with this mindset, how you insult yourself freely and treat yourself even worse than other people. I know it sounds flat being said by some rando on the internet, but please, for the love of anything - DON'T BE YOUR OWN EXECUTIONER

I wish for you to get on straight, work through your problems and actually start seeing value in yourself - and I seriously say this sincerely.

if you need help, if you need someone to talk to, you can dm me even, everyone can if they want, I always respond whenever I have time - be it to just listen or to try and give some advice or perspective.

 

[TheLightOfMyLife]

I am sorry life treated you in a way that made this outlook your main compass in relations.

Sure, physical attractiveness is in fact important, but nobody said anything that says otherwise actually. In this day and age, many people who ask for advice such as this, most of the time lack even the most basic foundations to create a relationship in the first place. That is I think, because they've never had the drive themselves, and nobody pushed them to go out and learn the hard way, to get experience in relationships.

Another thing, is personality a meme to you? is attitude not important you think? Do you believe that if you were acting all pretentious and aggressive you could get out of speeding ticket? Do you think if you come up to group of people and be angry at everything, only complain and throw judgments left and right they would feel okay in your company?

Physical looks aren't everything, they are part of a much, much bigger picture that a lot of people these days reject, don't know why, be it insecurity, fear - the most important thing is - yeah, if your personality is flat, and you are constantly angry at everything, have some inner sense that everything and everyone owes you, and have almost verging on paranoid conviction that our reality is as simple as few words thrown in the wind, then yeah, this statement becomes believable - it helps you sleep at night right? It's not your responsibility, you were born ugly. It's not your responsibility, everyone else has too high of expectations right? It's not your responsibility, 99% of women actively chase 0.0000001% mythical males.

Feel free to feel attacked, as you probably will anyway, but please, please - "one look outside the window" and what you stated is disproved. Have you watched people around you? Do you feel like everyone who you see, is in relationship because they are height of beauty and have perfect body builds?

Physical looks - the genetical ones - apply only to one specific thing in broad summary: Preferences. It's not be-all-end-all. Sure, if you are ugly you will have bad time here on earth, but most people aren't objectively ugly, and I will assume, that you yourself may count yourself amidst the legion of the ugly ones - since you have pretty negative attitude towards this topic.

But know this, if you show yourself, and you aren't objectively ugly, you should actually feel bad for what you are doing, to others and to YOURSELF. If you are, then too bad, nothing you can change so might as well not be a negative energy syphon and enjoy life as much as you can.

but sure, you have to be a billionaire to have a girlfriend, and be 6ft10 tall white chadwick bonzo, with 10 inches package and 100kgs of muscles, a perfectly designed piece of art by Michaelangelo - personality is a fake construct.

PS: You might still scoff at the idea, regarding your absurdly aggressive attitude towards personality, but try looking in the mirror, you might actually see something.

Peace
Also, please unlock your profile for people to see - I always love that negative people like you radiate their own insecurity everywhere, even some far off forum on the internet, what are you afraid of people seeing?

Just a thought :)

I will ignore the fact that you are insanely condescending and full of yourself for the time being and reply to this post.

Obviously physical attractiveness is important. I would say that in comparison, hardly anything else is, if we extend our idea of physical attractiveness to having desirable immutable genetic traits, such as having the correct race, the correct face, the correct height, being intelligent, your gender(since women will ALWAYS be desired by men) etc etc. The truth of the matter is that if you have those correct characteristics, people will be naturally drawn to you and so you shall develop the foundation for social and dating success. The unfortunate truth is that if you have difficulties dating and establishing romantic relationships, you probably just are not a desirable specimen. Not because of things you can change, but because you were deemed garbage early in and have been left in the dirt.

Personality is a meme in the sense that it is so incredibly insignificant in the way that others view you compared to those immutable traits and as stated previously is more often used as a justification for one's view of you as opposed to being a truly valuable thing in it's own right. Now, of course, once you are desirable, personality can matter in maintaining long term relationships, but you will never ever reach that point if you don't have the necessary desirable and immutable traits. Personality is NOT ever the deciding factor in attracting someone initially. It is only useful once there has already been a good assessment of your genetic worth. Your looks, race, height, intelligence, etc etc always take precedence in the way someone evaluates you.

As for my own personality, you fail to acknowledge that aside from the genetic factors that make me inclined to certain traits, this miserable angry demeanor is the result of people shitting on me for my entire life. Personalities are not just some bad choice that I arrived at because I'm just a bad horrible mean person and it's all my fault and I somehow could have like totally been different. This is the result of being shown that I am garbage for the past 26 years of my life, lol. Because I KNOW that people will feel negatively towards me on sight just for the way that I was born.

So what there are average or dopey looking people in relationships? Virtually all of these can be explained by those men being doormats, emotional tampons, resource providers, cuckolds etc. They aren't loved and their relationships hinge only on their usefulness. That much should be obvious by how high the divorce rates are and the fact that women initiate most divorces. Women get fucking sick of their pathetic ugly husbands once they no longer have use for them.

Physical looks are far more objective than you seem to think. Even children, babies can recognize what traits are more attractive and what traits are ugly. It is built in. People desire tall, well formed, healthy, light skinned, light eyed people. Those "preferences" are a couple million years in the making, and you try to brush hem off as being some silly arbitrary cutesy thing like styling your tumblr page.

You don't have to be a 6ft 10 mythical man, that is not what I am saying. But if you are some 5'11 half black guy like me, you may as well write your dating life off unless you have money, connections, or something else

This is so stupid and it's actually you who needs to join the real world. Im 5'7 and most men I meet happen to be my height or shorter. I've happily dated them because who tf cares? Ive also only been with one white man and he was latino, everyone else has been a man of color, brown, black, indigenous. Not that it matters tbh, just trying to show you not everyone is exclusively attracted to white men or tall men. Some of them were considered more attractive than the others according to my friends or society's standards but it didnt make me love them any more or less and they were attractive to ME. what i truly loved was their ability to make me laugh, making them laugh, seeing the way their faces lit up when they spoke about their hobbies and interests, their imperfections. Their bodies and appearances were just a plus and not the main reason i didnt or did seek them out. ofc attraction does matter and is really important in a relationship but what is attractive to you may not be attractive to me and vice versa. NONE OF US ARE PERFECT!!! im sorry that you feel this way about yourself and i dont doubt that as a man of color, people have been cruel to you but there are people who would love you if you just let them. this mindset is unattractive in itself and keeping you alone . stop falling for the rage theyre baiting you with.

Oh ok, thanks for your very useful anecdotes that should change everything about reality.

this mindset is unattractive in itself and keeping you alone .

No, my fucking face race height etc are keeping me alone, you big joker you.

 

[CeaseExist]

Now, of course, once you are desirable, personality can matter in maintaining long term relationships, but you will never ever reach that point if you don't have the necessary desirable and immutable traits. Personality is NOT ever the deciding factor in attracting someone initially. It is only useful once there has already been a good assessment of your genetic worth. Your looks, race, height, intelligence, etc etc

I'm gonna come back here after I get some sleep finally, but I have to ask because it made me laugh a bit.

So which one is it? Looks are everything or do they only matter in attracting someone initially? XDDD dw. I'm aware one doesn't have to necessarily contradict the other, but it does look like that a lot of the time I see someone writing similar theories to yours.

And yeah, I do sound condescending, because I am, I put myself in a position of your senior, since from my perspective I clearly have more experience and insight. Hope that helps understanding my inputs better.

 

[TheLightOfMyLife]

I'm gonna come back here after I get some sleep finally, but I have to ask because it made me laugh a bit.

So which one is it? Looks are everything or do they only matter in attracting someone initially? XDDD dw. I'm aware one doesn't have to necessarily contradict the other, but it does look like that a lot of the time I see someone writing similar theories to yours.

And yeah, I do sound condescending, because I am, I put myself in a position of your senior, since from my perspective I clearly have more experience and insight. Hope that helps understanding my inputs better.

Looks/genetics matter MOST is what I mean to say. Personality matters once looks/genes are sufficient, but you can get by with only looks in some cases. You can never get by with only personality and insufficient looks.
That is to say there is a pyramid structure there with looks at the bottom and personality at some arbitrary upper layer. Without looks, it all crumbles to the ground. With looks and no personality, you can get up, but perhaps not as high as you could have.

Anyways, you don't have any experience with this, because you were obviously born in a position where you don't suffer from your looks. You're speaking from a position of privilege on a matter that hasn't affected your life the way it hasn't affected mine. It's like a trust fund baby telling a homeless man how he should start up his own business to get off the street.

Anyways, no need to come back here, you will be taking a nice seat on my ignore list bud.

 

[CeaseExist]

Looks/genetics matter MOST is what I mean to say. Personality matters once looks/genes are sufficient, but you can get by with only looks in some cases. You can never get by with only personality and insufficient looks.
That is to say there is a pyramid structure there with looks at the bottom and personality at some arbitrary upper layer. Without looks, it all crumbles to the ground. With looks and no personality, you can get up, but perhaps not as high as you could have.

Anyways, you don't have any experience with this, because you were obviously born in a position where you don't suffer from your looks. You're speaking from a position of privilege on a matter that hasn't affected your life the way it hasn't affected mine. It's like a trust fund baby telling a homeless man how he should start up his own business to get off the street.

Anyways, no need to come back here, you will be taking a nice seat on my ignore list bud.

Sure, block anyone with opposing views, someone who questions your worldview, it is really really healthy. Also Really nice for you to assume I am a privileged fuck just because I had more drive than you to actually go out there and make myself fit in the cogs.

I just hope people who come here to read, will see my posts and don't lean into that redpill nonsense.

Yeah, looks matter, but if you aren't a goddamn monster (which can be countered by you guessed it - PERSONALITY) then you still have chances. Sure, a lot of people are pretty shit, and superficial, but are those people the ones you want in your life? Oh right, you yourself are superficial and shallow, so I guess you would fit right in with them :)

And regarding the experience thing - No, I'm not some chad with jawline that can cut diamonds, in fact I am pretty average as everyone else aside my own crafted way of carrying myself.

Dismiss it all you want, shield yourself with your insecurities but one thing you don't know about me is that behind my successes, there are 12 years of heartbreak, pain, suffering, agony of not being able to fit, of not being enough, of my looks being criticized, time and time again - One thing that made me laugh also, was that you stated "thanks for your anecdotes, your words will change how our reality is..." or something like that, and, I couldn't not see, how absurdly ironic your statement is - Do you think your tantrums, your negative worldview, putting yourself down and just dwelling in misery will change it? I know what you are, and that you sit there only because it gives you comfort, that it is not your fault if you failed, it's everyone else's.

I think that's the one thing people like you, and all the redpill sphere don't really want to face, that dating, creating relationships is actually HUGE EFFORT, that you have to learn it, find yourself in it, use everything you have at your disposal to succeed. But sure, yeah, tell me I have no experience because I am privileged, fuck me and all the hardships I endured to actually KNOW MY LIMITS and HOW TO FIT MYSELF IN SOCIAL SETTINGS, fuck my experiences of being rejected again and again and again, fuck my experience of making mistakes and losing relationships, fuck my experience of actually getting up all the time and TRYING, with all my strength to succeed - I am just a trust fund baby after all.

Actually pathetic behavior - I hope you will enjoy your life someday.

 

[EvisceratedJester]

Women don't give a fuck about the attitude. The attitude only matters when you're ugly as fuck and look like shit. Then they tell you it's your attitude in order to justify the hatred which they already felt because of your looks.

Women want men who are tall, white, with masculine model-esque faces. If you have that, in the exact same manner as before, they will use your actions to justify their love for you.

If you're ugly and you're nice? You're too creepy and desperate
If you're hot and you're nice? You're so sweet and kind

Ugly and mean? You're a horrible bitter little loser
Hot and mean? You're a bad boy and exciting.

Quit with the normie gaslighting and get a clue dude.

I'm a woman and I do give a fuck about the attitude, hence me pointing it out. Also, somebody needs to learn what the word "gaslighting" means...

There are plenty of cases of women falling in love and being in relationships with men who don't meet conventional beauty standards. I can't help but find it a bit funny that the same dude who happens to clearly have an obsession with Margret Qualley, an incredibly attractive, taller-than-average, white woman, is going to come on here and whine about all women being into men who are white, taller than average, and model-esque in appearance (which isn't even true).

Also, you do realize that women who don't fit conventional beauty standards are also treated like crap too, right? Sometimes they are treated poorly to an even worse degree compared to men since there is a lot more pressure put on women to look good and, in general, their issues with lookism end up intertwined with their issues with sexism.

 

[TheLightOfMyLife]

I'm a woman and I do give a fuck about the attitude, hence me pointing it out. Also, somebody needs to learn what the word "gaslighting" means...

There are plenty of cases of women falling in love and being in relationships with men who don't meet conventional beauty standards. I can't help but find it a bit funny that the same dude who happens to clearly have an obsession with Margret Qualley, an incredibly attractive, taller-than-average, white woman, is going to come on here and whine about all women being into men who are white, taller than average, and model-esque in appearance (which isn't even true).

Also, you do realize that women who don't fit conventional beauty standards are also treated like crap too, right? Sometimes they are treated poorly to an even worse degree compared to men since there is a lot more pressure put on women to look good and, in general, their issues with lookism end up intertwined with their issues with sexism.

You mean you claim to gaf about attitude. But what people say is not the same as what they do.

happens to clearly have an obsession with Margret Qualley

women who don't fit conventional beauty standards are also treated like crap

nope nope nope

The way ugly women are treated is not even comparable. An ugly woman will never be truly undesired and she can always be loved. An ugly man needs to lay down and rot.
Women have far less pressure on them to look good than men do, since a woman is inherently valuable to men by virtue of her womanhood alone. A man isn't valuable to women unless he's a head above other men, literally and figuratively. Women most definitely do not love ugly or even mediocre men. Not at all, I will reject that notion entirely and will not even entertain the idea that it could happen save for cases of severe mental illness.

 

[EvisceratedJester]

You mean you claim to gaf about attitude. But what people say is not the same as what they do.

nope nope nope

The way ugly women are treated is not even comparable. An ugly woman will never be truly undesired and she can always be loved. An ugly man needs to lay down and rot.
Women have far less pressure on them to look good than men do, since a woman is inherently valuable to men by virtue of her womanhood alone. A man isn't valuable to women unless he's a head above other men, literally and figuratively. Women most definitely do not love ugly or even mediocre men. Not at all, I will reject that notion entirely and will not even entertain the idea that it could happen save for cases of severe mental illness.

How are you going to claim that women who don't meet conventional beauty standards aren't treated like crap when many of them have talked about being treated like crap before and being made out to be undesirable. Hell, how are you going to claim that women don't have as much pressure put on them to look good when there is a long history of media picking apart every aspect of different female celebrities' appearances? Hell, even most men agree that women have more pressure on them to try and look good at all times.

It's even funnier to hear this bullshit since I feel like you are completely forgetting about dudes, like Danny Devito, who are married and have children. But sure, men who aren't conventionally attractive are never desired at all!/s

Maybe the issue isn't the fact that you aren't attractive, but rather it's the fact that you seem to prefer whining and making large generalizations about women in order to cope with the fact that no woman wants to guy with a dude whose personality is anything like yours?

 

[CeaseExist]

How are you going to claim that women who don't meet conventional beauty standards aren't treated like crap when many of them have talked about being treated....

At this point it's just feeding to a troll, I would gladly just report them for causing discord on the forum, instead of actually making civilized conversation. The gifs are also really such a frustrating thing, like, we get it, you are a basement dweller who thinks gifs make them look cool and uncaring about the whole thing, all the while just focusing on riling people up and making them frustrated.

@TheLightOfMyLife - find yourself something better to do, your life is leaking through your fingers pretty fast. Also, just admit to your defeat and go back to your redpill echochamber to your boyfriends, they will lick your butthole to your hearts content.
I also love how he jumped straight to blocking me what's the matter, did something I said hit home too close? God dang it I'm tired.

 

[TheLightOfMyLife]

How are you going to claim that women who don't meet conventional beauty standards aren't treated like crap when many of them have talked about being treated like crap before and being made out to be undesirable. Hell, how are you going to claim that women don't have as much pressure put on them to look good when there is a long history of media picking apart every aspect of different female celebrities' appearances? Hell, even most men agree that women have more pressure on them to try and look good at all times.

It's even funnier to hear this bullshit since I feel like you are completely forgetting about dudes, like Danny Devito, who are married and have children. But sure, men who aren't conventionally attractive are never desired at all!/s

Maybe the issue isn't the fact that you aren't attractive, but rather it's the fact that you seem to prefer whining and making large generalizations about women in order to cope with the fact that no woman wants to guy with a dude whose personality is anything like yours?

Women absolutely do not have the same pressure to look good. Perhaps you could make that argument in the past when women did not have the ability to work or anything, and were thusly dependent on men, but in the 21st century when women can take care of themselves, this is not the case. Women now make all of the decisions regarding dating and have all of the control. A woman can make her own money and can have whatever guy she pleases. A man now can only have value by being a stellar genetic specimen since women no longer need a man for financial support.

Any man "agreeing" with that is ironically doing so because women have less pressure in general. Men are more empathetic to women, everyone is. Nobody gives a shit about a random dude or his struggles.

Danny Devito

oh yeah famous and rich people are great examples

personality

mostly irrelevant factor for dating and my personality is merely a consequence of being treated liek shit for my looks.