I believe it is relative to post count or reaction score. I am not sure of the precise metric, but I have messaging ability after just a couple months here.
Keep participating. Lurking is not enough to meet the activity requirements. The exact requirements are not published to deter bot accounts, spam, trolls, etc. But yes you have to actually post.
You have to have 20 posts before you can message people. You can write your own thread, reply to other people's posts, or play games to raise your post count.
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