Venting How are you feeling today?

[LukaParrot]

I used to hate raining days, you get wet, cold and feels like it brings all my past ghosts, my mistakes alive.

Today I enjoy walking in the rain when I realize nobody could see tears in my face.

I wished so hard to see one last time, a woman that i really loved and somehow It became reality. She was driving and saw me at same time we exchange sights and for a brief moment I felt alive.

I'm not lying or dreaming, I thank god for giving me my last wish.

 

[needthebus]

bad

 

[Anonymousa]

Fucking terrible. Every kind of negative thought and feeling that i can have is happening all at once.

 

[nomoredolor]

I'm so glad you had that last glance. Something like that can mean everything in the end.

I am feeling profound grief and pain and I just want to join my love in death. But feel like absolute dogshit when I consider how it will affect my family. I feel trapped like I can no longer live but also feel like I can't die. I hate this. I just want the pain to stop.
Anna

 

[LukaParrot]

Thank you for the support.... i still wondering the chances for that happened, last time we meet was 15 years ago. It was the exact time for me to drive and park at my mother place, get all the car, and walk a short distance in the street to the buildings...... she was still beautilful, she leaned on the car dashboard with mouth open looking at me.

I already took my pills for today and feeling a little better....

 

[ShatteredSerenity]

I'm tired of living in my fucked up mentally ill body, forced to endure the endless sadness and torment. I'm frustrated that euthanasia is illegal, I wish the lawmakers could experience my hell so maybe they'd have more compassion for those who need to escape this cruel world.

 

[natthebrat]

conflicted and bittersweet. dont feel like discussing why atm.

 

[FuneralCry]

I personally always feel so dreadful to exist, I'm always so tired of being burdened with this existence, all I wish and hope for is to permanently cease existing and never suffer ever again, I find existence to be so deeply undesirable, I'd never wish for any of this suffering.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I feel like I'm in that kind of holding pattern planes perform before they can land. I just reluctantly go through the motions in life. I make more effort if I can be judged and fail but when it comes to not absolutely essentials, I'm like a snail who keeps disappearing back into their shell to procrastinate.

Basically though, I'm perpetually fed up pretty much. From there, I have brief moments of grief, anger, fear and some joy. Mostly though, I'm just lethargic and generally displeased with having to sustain my ridiculous life.

 

[Nadir]

sadness at the moment. its ok. itll pass. hard to feel though.

 

[hereornot]

Absolutely no hope

 

[Young]

I feel like shit for absolutely no reason

 

[Valhala]

So I would immediately drink SN if I had it.

I used to hate raining days, you get wet, cold and feels like it brings all my past ghosts, my mistakes alive.

Today I enjoy walking in the rain when I realize nobody could see tears in my face.

I wished so hard to see one last time, a woman that i really loved and somehow It became reality. She was driving and saw me at same time we exchange sights and for a brief moment I felt alive.

I'm not lying or dreaming, I thank god for giving me my last wish.

Because of my impatience, I broke up with the only woman I really loved three times. She became disappointed in me, got angry and prevented any contact. By losing her, I lost all meaning in life.. The hope that we would be together again kept me here for a year with immense mental pain and suffering for her. However, at one point I even came to terms with the fact that we will never be together again, hope disappeared but life became even more meaningless - it's all over closer.

 

[requiemforadream]

Numb