Venting honestly whats wrong with me

[itsyaboimio]

a few days ago, i was really having fun with life, i feel like the happiest person on earth. Out of sudden, i feel extremely numb just because my friends doesnt reply my chat. Idk, i just think my entire happiness is decided by other people, i can only be happy if my friends responds to me all the time. For some time now, I've been feeling abandoned and now im feeling suicidal af. I wanna kill myself, but im too scared. I have resorted to some unhealthy coping mechanism to escape from this feeling. why cant i be someone's favorite person. whats the point of living if nobody truly cared about me. whats the point if im unworthy of attention. i wonder why im so childish like this, i cant help but feel this way.

 

[todiefor]

I don't think many on this forum would think that's childish. People can be very insensitive, or just stuck in their own world, or maybe didn't know you expected their reply, and that could be painful I totally get that feeling.

 

[Huntfish34]

I have no idea..... But I'm right there with you sadly. Idk wtf my problem is either ? I can be extremely beat down in the Same exact ways. If I don't get a text , or a call that I expect... whatever it may be, I go into a toxic " pity party " or some kind of episode about being unworthy, worthless, useless, ... it's Fckn insanity, I hate it.

Thoughts and prayers to you always, Godspeed. ♥

What kind of unhealthy coping ? I understand if you don't want to say, but mine are usually alcohol/ drugs.

 

[itsyaboimio]

I have no idea..... But I'm right there with you sadly. Idk wtf my problem is either ? I can be extremely beat down in the Same exact ways. If I don't get a text , or a call that I expect... whatever it may be, I go into a toxic " pity party " or some kind of episode about being unworthy, worthless, useless, ... it's Fckn insanity, I hate it.

Thoughts and prayers to you always, Godspeed. ♥

yeah, and the fact this behavior has made me pushed away so many people causing me to be even lonelier than ever :(

I don't think many on this forum would think that's childish. People can be very insensitive, or just stuck in their own world, or maybe didn't know you expected their reply, and that could be painful I totally get that feeling.

thank you so much :)