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[Prénom Surnom]

I was planning on ctb next week with the Chloroquine method, but something just happened and I don't know what to do. I'm chronically ill and have no family and no way to support myself anymore, so I have no other options. I still have a little money, but it basically equals what is owed on my credit card and I don't want to leave any debt. I also still have some credit available, but I am basically homeless now and booked myself into a hotel for 2 weeks. I wanted some time to prepare myself and figured nobody would pay much attention to me during my stay, but there was a problem with the computer system and it kept charging my credit card so I had to let them know. They were nice about it, but now I'm not "invisible". I don't know if I still feel comfortable doing it here or if I should find someplace else. Please let me know if you have any thoughts or suggestions about this. I'm in so much pain physically and mentally, that I can't think clearly. Thanks.

 

[DrownedOctopus]

I don't think it would raise any red flags for anyone unless there's already suspicion of your plans.
Your concern about it charging your account still wouldn't lead one to think suicide—a lot of people think those that want to ctb are inconsiderate and wouldn't care about leaving behind a massive debt.
If it makes you uncomfortable, don't do it and look for a different place-option.
Personally, I don't think it raises enough alarms for your plans to be thwarted.

 

[lost_soul83]

I was planning on ctb next week with the Chloroquine method, but something just happened and I don't know what to do. I'm chronically ill and have no family and no way to support myself anymore, so I have no other options. I still have a little money, but it basically equals what is owed on my credit card and I don't want to leave any debt. I also still have some credit available, but I am basically homeless now and booked myself into a hotel for 2 weeks. I wanted some time to prepare myself and figured nobody would pay much attention to me during my stay, but there was a problem with the computer system and it kept charging my credit card so I had to let them know. They were nice about it, but now I'm not "invisible". I don't know if I still feel comfortable doing it here or if I should find someplace else. Please let me know if you have any thoughts or suggestions about this. I'm in so much pain physically and mentally, that I can't think clearly. Thanks.

I think you'll be fine if you stay where you are. I don't think anyone will "notice" you and make any trouble for you. I wish things were different for you, and everyone on this site for that matter. I hate to see people suffering and know that there's absolutely nothing I can do to help them. I'm sorry darling, I truly am. I wish I could take all your suffering away. Take care and I hope everything works out so that you finally find peace.

 

[Empty Smile]

You're still invisible. If you're not making any depressed looks or talks of suicide, no one will pay any attention to you. Stay a few days, work on your plan. If you still want to do it there, make yourself visible to people there and "act" happy. That will give them the false impression. But inside, you're dying.

 

[Prénom Surnom]

You're still invisible. If you're not making any depressed looks or talks of suicide, no one will pay any attention to you. Stay a few days, work on your plan. If you still want to do it there, make yourself visible to people there and "act" happy. That will give them the false impression. But inside, you're dying.

Thanks. I've gotten really good at this. Sometimes, I even believe it myself. Someone at the hotel asked me if I wanted to have a drink at the bar and all I could think of was saying "no, I'm dying".

I don't think it would raise any red flags for anyone unless there's already suspicion of your plans.
Your concern about it charging your account still wouldn't lead one to think suicide—a lot of people think those that want to ctb are inconsiderate and wouldn't care about leaving behind a massive debt.
If it makes you uncomfortable, don't do it and look for a different place-option.
Personally, I don't think it raises enough alarms for your plans to be thwarted.

Thanks. I'm not really concerned about the credit card, I was just mentioning it because I can buy myself a little more time if I have to. I just feel weird about having conversations with the staff and then doing it here. Maybe it's just guilt.

 

[DrownedOctopus]

Thanks. I've gotten really good at this. I

Thanks. I'm not really concerned about the credit card, I was just mentioning it because I can buy myself a little more time if I have to. I just feel weird about having conversations with the staff and then doing it here. Maybe it's just guilt.

Understandable. It's easier to act on something when there isn't some semblance of connection with those around you.

 

[Prénom Surnom]

I think you'll be fine if you stay where you are. I don't think anyone will "notice" you and make any trouble for you. I wish things were different for you, and everyone on this site for that matter. I hate to see people suffering and know that there's absolutely nothing I can do to help them. I'm sorry darling, I truly am. I wish I could take all your suffering away. Take care and I hope everything works out so that you finally find peace.

Thank you for your kind words. I hope you and everyone else here will find peace too.

Understandable. It's easier to act on something when there isn't some semblance of connection with those around you.

That's exactly it. I didn't want to connect with anyone here. I don't know if that's some kind of sign not to do it here, or if I should just stick with my plan.

 

[Prénom Surnom]

I don't think I can do it here now. The staff are being extra nice and gave me some vouchers for meals and drinks to make up for the problem. It makes me feel even worse than I already do. Now I'm wasting money on 2 weeks here and still have to find someplace else.