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Pure

Pure

Specialist
Jun 29, 2021
366
it's the space between no longer wanting to be alive but being too cowardly to commit suicide.

I can't imagine anything more worse than this space.

I think I'm going to buy SN not to ctb at the moment but something to keep around as an assurance to myself to not keep moving like a zombie when I have an easily accessible way out.
 
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Alwaysbadtime

Alwaysbadtime

Enlightened
Jun 28, 2021
1,158
Sure. Yes it's awful. I've spent years wanting to escape but being too scared. No enjoyable seconds.

Good luck with sn...or just feeling better about having an out.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
46,193
Yes, this life is hell. It is like being trapped, not wanting to live but feeling like you are unable to ctb. I think for me it is the survival instinct, we are programmed to live which means taking our lives is hard, and the chance of failing attempts with consequences.
 
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toforigivelife

Arcanist
Jul 5, 2021
493
Humans have been programmed to survive at any cost since the caveman days.

The position you're in is hell.

But don't do anything that you're not ready to do.

The only thing I have to go on are near death experiences. According the more sane and believable people who have these experiences, there is no hell. We all have to deal with our actions, good or bad.

In other words it would take people a lot less time to deal with our wrongdoings than you're average serial killer, but that there is no hell. Eventually everyone works through their own karma.

It's funny how many people fear the hell that wasn't introduced until the 15th century when the place we're living in right now is actually hell.
 
Pure

Pure

Specialist
Jun 29, 2021
366
Alright bought the SN and it will be delivered on Friday.

I immediately felt of wave of relief. Only that sucks is that I'd have to delay ctbing until October-ish since my sister is getting married and I'm cognizant enough to know that I can't be /that/ shitty to do it beforehand so close.
 

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