Rudi
𝔐𝔬𝔯𝔦 𝔳𝔬𝔩𝔬 𝔰𝔢𝔡 𝔳𝔦𝔳𝔢𝔯𝔢 𝔳𝔬𝔩𝔬
- Oct 15, 2024
- 79
I'll start off by saying that I don't hate my mom. I kind of have a hate-love relationship with her and that since a couple years now.
Will she ever understand that she isn't always in the right? Cause to me it seems like she never will. I've tried explaining to her that just because she's my mom doesn't mean she will always be in the right. It took me also so long to realise that some parents never grow up, and I believe she is one of these people.
It's such a pain to be in the same house as her sometimes but I'm gonna move out once I have enough money for that anyway.
Today had me so confused. About a few hours ago she asked me to go downstairs and help her carry groceries upstairs (we live on the 5th floor) and when she called me she asked me to literally run and pick those groceries up quickly, because she was already late to some meeting with a friend. I was still in my PJs when I got called by her so I didn't care about changing my clothes and ran down. Except when she saw that I didn't even care to change my clothes she just full on lashed out at me. I ignored her and went upstairs.
When she came back home she saw that I was dressed and said "Yeah you don't need to get dressed now, everyone in that apartment has probably already seen you in PJs" and I replied with "I'm gonna go outside later, that's why"
And she got mad AGAIN and said "And why do you think you can go outside without asking me for permission" like what?? im not a kid anymore. I just shrugged it off and she left my room. I decided to ask her if I can go outside anyway to not get her pissed even more by just leaving the house without saying anything. Her response to my question was just "This time you can. But next time, if you don't ask for permission, I won't let you leave the house. I'll even leave you locked up in here if needed" like are you fucking crazy?? Have you lost your mind completely??
She sometimes gets me so furious and then expects me to talk to her normally and calmly (which I even do, most of the time) but once I talk to her with a slightly louder voice than usual she starts saying shit like "I wish you were never born" Same, mom, same but this is your and dad's fault.
There were also times where she said stuff like "If you're that suicidal then go on and jump out the window" (and our window was open too). She said those things mostly after finding out that I'm suicidal because she had the urge to read through my fucking chats. I'm so mad I can't even describe it.
Will she ever understand that she isn't always in the right? Cause to me it seems like she never will. I've tried explaining to her that just because she's my mom doesn't mean she will always be in the right. It took me also so long to realise that some parents never grow up, and I believe she is one of these people.
It's such a pain to be in the same house as her sometimes but I'm gonna move out once I have enough money for that anyway.
Today had me so confused. About a few hours ago she asked me to go downstairs and help her carry groceries upstairs (we live on the 5th floor) and when she called me she asked me to literally run and pick those groceries up quickly, because she was already late to some meeting with a friend. I was still in my PJs when I got called by her so I didn't care about changing my clothes and ran down. Except when she saw that I didn't even care to change my clothes she just full on lashed out at me. I ignored her and went upstairs.
When she came back home she saw that I was dressed and said "Yeah you don't need to get dressed now, everyone in that apartment has probably already seen you in PJs" and I replied with "I'm gonna go outside later, that's why"
And she got mad AGAIN and said "And why do you think you can go outside without asking me for permission" like what?? im not a kid anymore. I just shrugged it off and she left my room. I decided to ask her if I can go outside anyway to not get her pissed even more by just leaving the house without saying anything. Her response to my question was just "This time you can. But next time, if you don't ask for permission, I won't let you leave the house. I'll even leave you locked up in here if needed" like are you fucking crazy?? Have you lost your mind completely??
She sometimes gets me so furious and then expects me to talk to her normally and calmly (which I even do, most of the time) but once I talk to her with a slightly louder voice than usual she starts saying shit like "I wish you were never born" Same, mom, same but this is your and dad's fault.
There were also times where she said stuff like "If you're that suicidal then go on and jump out the window" (and our window was open too). She said those things mostly after finding out that I'm suicidal because she had the urge to read through my fucking chats. I'm so mad I can't even describe it.
