
003
One step closer
- Aug 22, 2024
- 63
Hey. I haven't posted or come here in months. I continue to believe that I am going to CTB some time this year. I guess I'm making this post because I believe I have a date set. However, I can't bring myself to stick to a method.
When I joined, I believed I wanted to go through with drowning. However, after researching and experimenting with said method, I think it would be a pretty scary way to go. In March, I impulsively decided to try and hang myself partially with a belt, to which I experienced a lot of head pressure and dark spots in my vision. I gave up on after a minute, I'm not sure why.
I am thinking of renting a hotel room and attempting to partially hang again, this time successfully. I plan to mix Vistaril and Prozac with alcohol to make the experience more "tolerable." Is a belt reliable? How can I do this "right"? I feel like resources make it look easier than it is. Should I just continue practicing? Should I use rope instead? Is drowning still a viable option?
When I joined, I believed I wanted to go through with drowning. However, after researching and experimenting with said method, I think it would be a pretty scary way to go. In March, I impulsively decided to try and hang myself partially with a belt, to which I experienced a lot of head pressure and dark spots in my vision. I gave up on after a minute, I'm not sure why.
I am thinking of renting a hotel room and attempting to partially hang again, this time successfully. I plan to mix Vistaril and Prozac with alcohol to make the experience more "tolerable." Is a belt reliable? How can I do this "right"? I feel like resources make it look easier than it is. Should I just continue practicing? Should I use rope instead? Is drowning still a viable option?