decisui
Member
- Feb 27, 2021
- 31
Hello, I'm new here. I've been suicidal for a long time and this side has actually been a blessing because I've acquired so much useful info on how to do it. When i was younger i wanted to drown myself, then i tried to hang myself but it wasn't planned very well. At the moment i'm peaceful and sure that i want to go, i really feel extremely close to actually doing it, my existence is slightly more bearable because i know the pain is gonna end soon so there's no need to worry about what's happening in my life, it helped me get through a breakup recently. So i've chosen partial hanging, i think it's the best method, quick and relatively painless. I haven't found an anchor point yet, but i'm gonna do it in my room. To be honest, I'm scared shitless of surviving and being disabled for the rest of my life. But well, i'm gonna take the risk. My family will probably be sad, which i feel bad about but i can't live my life for other people. It's a bit upsetting that no one likes me enough to care about my death (fact, not an opinion) but it's good that i won't hurt too many people with my suicide. I've read a lot about how long it takes to lose consciousness, some sites say it can be even 4 minutes but here i'm reading that it's actually around 10 seconds so that's good and i'm relieved but I'm confused whether it's true, hope so. It's such a nice feeling that what i desire the most (death) is only a few seconds away. Sorry if this is boring i just wanted to express what i feel somewhere.