Had a chat with support workers over suicide and it rubbed me the wrong way a little.

[Always-in-trouble]

We were having a disscussion about school and all that until we eventually reached my PIP application (basically disability allowance). I was talking about how I felt that I was feeling lacklustre; guilty about not achieving due to me being a high-functioning autistic and how it limits me like others with it. While they did say it was okay to be struggling and will refrain from yelling and shouting by instead teaching properly, I don't think they knew how much stress I get from this and other issues like extreme daydreaming and lethargicness which kills my ability to focus much other than repetitive tasks like gaming or helping with chores. Then we went to college and the reason why I was going to drop out - being suicidal and falling behind assignments (though I was being really weird with it and got into a mess which caused too many other things to happen), causing them to say: ''Please do not kill yourself, its the most selfish thing to do and would break everyone hearts. Besides, you are not even that sad enough to do it.'' While I understand they are very worried about me and they do a good job of making me complete college while preparing me for semi-independence at the same time, I don't like that they tried guilt-trip me essentially even if I somewhat feel the same way myself. Maybe I am just whiner, my trauma isn't even that bad, likely they why they felt that in the first place.

 

[witchbimbo]

No, you're not being a whiner! That's a horrible thing to say to someone on the edge! It's like telling someone they wouldn't do it!

I was basically goaded into both my attempts by people that refused to take my pain seriously telling me I wouldn't or thst I was just being dramatic. That said, those were my peers as a teen and not an adult professionally tasked with helping me... Anyone working with disabled people needs to handle that kind of situation much better than that person did.

I'm so sorry you were dismissed and guilt tripped like that. It was incredibly irresponsible of that person to say that and also complete bs. As someone with lethargy and a propensity for maladaptive daydreaming (likely autistic but not diagnosed, definitely ADHD but the meds don't solve those issues in my case), that person had no clue how difficult and frustrating life is with these sorts of issues.

If you have the ability and energy, it might be with reporting them imho! (Even if you don't remember their name, they may be able to find out who you spoke to.) I completely understand if you're not up to it though, absolutely no pressure.

What an incredibly selfish thing for that person to say! I'm so livid for you!

 

[Always-in-trouble]

No, you're not being a whiner! That's a horrible thing to say to someone on the edge! It's like telling someone they wouldn't do it!

I was basically goaded into both my attempts by people that refused to take my pain seriously telling me I wouldn't or thst I was just being dramatic. That said, those were my peers as a teen and not an adult professionally tasked with helping me... Anyone working with disabled people needs to handle that kind of situation much better than that person did.

I'm so sorry you were dismissed and guilt tripped like that. It was incredibly irresponsible of that person to say that and also complete bs. As someone with lethargy and a propensity for maladaptive daydreaming (likely autistic but not diagnosed, definitely ADHD but the meds don't solve those issues in my case), that person had no clue how difficult and frustrating life is with these sorts of issues.

If you have the ability and energy, it might be with reporting them imho! (Even if you don't remember their name, they may be able to find out who you spoke to.) I completely understand if you're not up to it though, absolutely no pressure.

What an incredibly selfish thing for that person to say! I'm so livid for you!

Thanks. I actually live with the two support workers since I was in a placement for a year so I know them a bit at least. They kinda have standard views on suicide since they never experienced it other then one of thier cousins who commited. Feels like he habors resentment over that (also I think I botched the thread by posting twice on accident, having to use a switch dns exploit to where you cant format easily is so annoying, gonna try and fix it.)

 

[no-hope-no-future]

I'm incredibly annoyed about the way they you have Been treated but I'm not surprised. They have no other way of dealing with you other then to try and manipulate you while completely denying your feelings or anything that is making you feel like you want to cbt. You are not a whiner and you have every right to feel the way you are purely because of the way they have spoken to you.

You deserve to be treated with far greater respect then that person has treated you.

 

[LonelyPrince]

'Please do not kill yourself, its the most selfish thing to do and would break everyone hearts. Besides, you are not even that sad enough to do it.''

What the fuck?
This actually makes me mad. That's so disrespectful and invalidating.
The "suicide is a selfish thing" is something I hear everyday and can understand to some extent why people would say that ( in my opinion, though, saying that suicide is selfish is selfish in itself ), but the "besides, you are not even that sad enough to do it" throws me completely off.
It's so invalidating of your pain.