itsmeagain
Specialist
- Jan 28, 2020
- 334
Angels... All of you.
My lovely angels. My honeys. my absolute darlings. I do not know a lot of you that have come in place of the lovely ghosts before us, but I wanted to tell you that I am going to be moving on from SS.
When I first came to SS, I was lost. I had every intention of dying. I had every intention of giving the last drops of kindness my bruised heart could give out, and wring them out into a goblet of love that the people on the site can drink from.
I never expected that I would be here. Things are going better and I really want you all to know that I really cherished all the people I got to know.
When I made my name, "Itsmeagain", it was kind of symbolic. I felt that I would come back here so many times after I've taken the last blows to my knees until I fall, crippled on the floor. Unable. Unmoving. I would crawl to my computer, looking through the methods, and say to myself...
"Hello Sactioned Suicide... It's me again."
I had fortune for the first time in my life. Recovery isn't something that's easy, but I had a small bit of fortune which turned into a beautiful flower. A beautiful place for me to try and grow. I'm stretching now. I can finally use the gorilla tape to tape things, and don't have to worry about buying cornhole sacks at Walmart.
I want to wish all of you strength in the face of adversity. As long as I'm still on SS, I feel as though there is something I will be unable to find in myself. I feel as though I would give too much of myself to the point where I can no longer function. I don't want to hurt any of my lovely friends or family I've made anymore. I want to be able to give people my all whenever I can, and being on SS is just a bit too complicated for me.
The slashes through all my lovely honies names is something that'll shake me to my very core. It's something that will shake my core, that will petrify me every time. To see people come and go is something I was used to, but now it bares a heavy burden on me. Although I am not pro life, I want to be able to make a necessary change I need to see for the people I can.
If you come across this, please know that there is someone out there blessing your beautiful hearts.
Please, keep well lovelies. All the people I used to know that have passed, I want for them to rest in peace.
And I hope... I hope I can find my peace among the living.
And SS...
It's me.
again.
for the last time.
<3