Venting God please let it end

[slurpkoi]

I was going to start this off with a " you don't understand!' but then I realized where I was. I just want it to end. Every day I wake up, I'm disappointed. I need it to end so bad I can't do this, I'm going to do something stupid and end up with a fate worse than death, idk what to do. I heard if you cut the carotid artery, you'll die. Maybe if I can locate it and then use a razor blade, it would work. I can't hang myself, my SI is too strong, and partial didn't work for me either, and I don't have money for SN or PN. I'm just putting this out there but if anyone can help me to that'd be great but really I just need this out there.

 

[FuneralCry]

I really understand finding it torturous to exist, I also just wish to be gone, I hope that you find the freedom from suffering you search for.