Giving up on life/becoming homeless

[dysfunctional]

Maybe just go camping for awhile?

 

[DeletedUser4739]

And whatever you do, do not get suckered into staying with a religious outreach homeless center, unless you're devoted to God or something, but they'll make you listen to sermons all day and then feed you. They'll also make sure to remind you that your predicament is God's Plan to save you from Hell.

They're everywhere! I've exhausted all the public health resources available to me for mental health counseling. My option now...faith-based counseling. Yes, let's add another existential crisis to my plate. Thank you. Missionaries do the same thing. Would you like clean water? Food? Schools? Okay, we can do that if you sign away your cultural identity and convert to our one and only correct religion. So twisted!

 

[DeletedUser4739]

Maybe just go camping for awhile?

Go wilin' with Walden ;)
https://books.google.com/books/abou...ver&source=kp_read_button#v=onepage&q&f=false

 

[Kdawg2018]

Yeah I don't recommend being homeless at all. What I did (while it isn't the same as chronically homeless, it still something to maybe relate to) was I took a bus to another city and spent the entire day (until past midnight) not having anywhere to sleep, or rest. There was little or no privacy, was tired and exhausted during the day, my legs ached after a lot of walking, it just overall sucks.

Anyways, I think if I was long term homeless, I'd ctb instead of living through the torment, the elements, the harassment, and overall starvation (unless I was planning to die of starvation, which I wouldn't since hypothermia is a better option than starvation and dehydration).

If you are considering being homeless then I would at least invest in having a mode of transportation like a van or a car.



I wonder if one could still be somewhat comfortable while in a car? I know one cannot fit as many things in a car as a van, let alone a mattress, but what about like sleeping in the back or something? I'm fairly tall and while I know I don't have enough space to really be as comfortable as a real bed, I'm sure there is a way to still be comfortable enough to get a good night's sleep?

My van was very comfy, GMC Savanna, had interior fancy lighting, leather back row that layed flat as a bed, window coverings, rear doors had windows with air vents, and it had a tv in the middle row. You put your wardrobe suitcase in the front seat, or you can keep your stuff in a storage unit to switch out clothes. Wash laundry at coin wash. Keep drawstring laundry bag for dirty, plastic laundry bin for clean. Make sure you are in an area with 24hr fitness or other 24hr gym. You can take a swim and shower there. If you are working the gyms help as well to get ready for work. Eat out, or get a camp stove that is the single one on a tiny canister of fuel, get a pot to cook with that has a foldable handle. Canned soup is really easy to cook this way. Get free food at public services or churches. Public librarys are good places to park during day and use their computers, books, and they have clean toilets. You can meet a lot of people at the parks as well. The main area I met similar ppl were at the rest stops. Ppl in this lifestyle ususally had something like a dui that kept them from working or there were young families saving enough to move somewhere less expensive. One lady told me she showered at the local college locker room and no one asked for her ID or anything

 

[DeletedUser4739]

I wish I had some positive story for you. It was sheer dumb luck that got me out of it. I encountered a somewhat distant aunt. She recognised me, we talked about my abusive stepfather and what he was doing to my mother and why I left. She then took me in, emptied out an annex of her house and I moved into there for several years. She got me mental health support as well. As once I had a place I developed the most intense agoraphobia and social anxiety. Took many years to overcome it. Bipolar further hampered efforts but I did secure a life and fulfilling career for myself in the end.

Homelessness is something I fear more than death. Especially now that I am sick. My government is also very punitive towards the disabled and unemployed. Convinced work cures every ailment going. So much so I am sure they would think nothing of replacing hospitals with workhouses as a tonic to the prevalence of shirkers, making excuses about drowning in lung fluid... The threat of homelessness is a core driver of my own push towards ctb. I can't do it again. Even the terminally ill are not spared such a fate in this shit hole country.

https://www.independent.co.uk/voice...ath-ed-davey-parliamentary-bill-a8434581.html



I think some of my guttural hard to hide hatred of religion comes from similar experiences. Charity wielded like a weapon of shame when already at your lowest! I have lost all tolerance these days. My only faith is in the wonders of science.

What good fortunate to have reconnected with your Aunt. Thank you for sharing that with me. We share some afflictions. I understand how they just add insult to injury. I think I would prefer death to homelessness as well. I'm trying so hard to make it so it doesn't come down to that, but I'm running out of health and time. Things like money, family and friends are long gone. I don't know how I will put myself back together this time. I can't identify anything to even hold on to at this point.

In the states, we have so many of the same problems. And while I realize it could be much, much worse, suffering is relative to the individual imo. Once I became unable to produce profits, I became obsolete and now have spent nearly ten years feeling either enslaved, imprisoned or disposable.

That article and the visuals are intense. And then floating, flashing all around are ads for all the holiday loveliness. This is such a bizarre world.

 

[DeletedUser4739]

My van was very comfy, GMC Savanna, had interior fancy lighting, leather back row that layed flat as a bed, window coverings, rear doors had windows with air vents, and it had a tv in the middle row. You put your wardrobe suitcase in the front seat, or you can keep your stuff in a storage unit to switch out clothes. Wash laundry at coin wash. Keep drawstring laundry bag for dirty, plastic laundry bin for clean. Make sure you are in an area with 24hr fitness or other 24hr gym. You can take a swim and shower there. If you are working the gyms help as well to get ready for work. Eat out, or get a camp stove that is the single one on a tiny canister of fuel, get a pot to cook with that has a foldable handle. Canned soup is really easy to cook this way. Get free food at public services or churches. Public librarys are good places to park during day and use their computers, books, and they have clean toilets. You can meet a lot of people at the parks as well. The main area I met similar ppl were at the rest stops. Ppl in this lifestyle ususally had something like a dui that kept them from working or there were young families saving enough to move somewhere less expensive. One lady told me she showered at the local college locker room and no one asked for her ID or anything

The experience you're sharing here is invaluable. Thank you.

 

[Throwawaysoul]

My van was very comfy,

OP should check out the van dwellers sub. Always having to use public toilets turns me off to van dwelling.

 

[Essie]

I have not read all the replies, but I am wondering if instead of becoming homeless you look into a "tiny" home community. I don't know where you live, but you could take the idea and DIY if not in a country with them. There are so many out there in the Western world, so it is not all hipsters in the US. Then you'd have a place to live for comfort. I do not think they have to be expensive to make/buy. They also DO have communities that do all sorts of things, like grow food and such. I do not know much about them but know they are becoming very popular since they cropped up a decade or so ago. It is better than being homeless and needing to go to shelters and get food and bathe and use the bathroom, and then there is always sickness and injury to deal with.

Edit to add: if you pay for it outright, then you own it for good. I do not know about the land it sits on and "rent" for that. But they may have communities that are self-sustaining so no one "works" past whatever they do in the community.

 

[Essie]

Some more things I want you to seriously take in mind, coming from personal experience. Having a bed in a safe, warm place is very important, as is access to food (that is safe to eat) and clean water.

Starvation is brutal. I know from nearly starving to death (from medical issues from pain) and from then trying to force the matter to just die and end it. You will want food. Even after months of not having it. You need to dehydrate to die unless you drop to about 12-13 BMI, and it is VERY difficult the last few days, and I caved after 2 mo of effort since I could sip water. It affects not just the throat and mouth but the whole body and can get gruesome at the very end. Having starved and dehydrated, it really messes up your body. You will be sick and weak all the time while starving and for months after--and I have not yet recovered, so I can't say if it is fully possible. You won't really be able to eat much of anything without vomiting even tiny bites of only bland food, and you will have violent stomach aches and GI issues when you do. Also, as a teen and in my 20s, I had fainting spells from hypoglycemia (blood sugar falling too low). If your body gets too hungry, you will be weak and possibly faint. I cracked my head and was out cold for a day in the hospital once, but I fainted often, and that is not pleasant either. Being homeless and having this problem would make it worse and put you in a vulnerable state.

Also, if you get injured, it will be even worse. I am literally bedridden and crippled from muscular-skeletal injuries from a masseuse tearing ligaments and tendons (among other medical errors). Someone beating you up could create the same injuries, and they will NEVER heal. Having that bed is the most important thing, and being protected from elements.

Also, not bathing (a real shower or bath), from personal experience of now having gone 7 mo without doing so (after trying to 1-2 times a month the first year) will create skin issues that will make it worse. I do not find sponge bathing to help. Only a real shower every few days would prevent it, ime. You will itch and smell and skin will turn brown, gray, and yellow and crust, and fall off in chunks. If you want to remove it, you need to soak it for 1/2 hour and then do so by hand with oil, and it takes 7 hrs for a body. Otherwise, you live like that.

Also, if you get sick, it can be brutal. I have been so sick, I was dying. I had a flu that turned to pneumonia for 3 mo. I almost choked on the mucus in the lungs and could barely get it up. I tore 3 muscles coughing. It was like knives stabbing me, and to this day, it is like that with every breath I take, or I feel like someone beat me with a bat in the rib cage. Again, having a bed and someone to lift me off it when I lost the use of those muscles entirely and could not move was important. Pneumonia would be a common thing to catch exposed to elements. It is not fun.

I don't mean to sound harsh, but what I went though with this alone was brutal, but I then went through worse and now am a full-bodied cripple who is very sick. I count myself lucky to have a roof over my head, a bed, and clean food and water. That is not the point here, just that I'd hate for you to set yourself up for something you don't see coming if there are better options available.

So look into any suggestions anyone else had first. Even living in a car is better, but hard to do w/o getting caught and told to move. Also, I hear it is hard to get out of being homeless once homeless b/c you'd need a phone at least to put on a job application, plus you need to look clean, and from experience, you will not look clean or healthy unless you are very lucky and don't encounter anything too bad.