Sheepgobaa
Member
- Aug 23, 2023
- 9
idk if this post is going to be coherent I just needed to get stuff of my chest feel free to ignore.
I've been seeing a psychiatrist and a psychologist for about 3 months now after my mental health got bad enough to where my family couldn't deny it anymore.
I've also been prescribed zoloft wich I've been taking for a little over a month but I feel as if u almost got worse.
Both my psychiatrist and psychologist give out advice you can find in q buzzfeed article and I don't feel comfortable fully opening up to either of them.
I was in an incredible bad place mentally due to my final exam and college entrance and it feels like all the comfort I managed to build up over the years by just rotting in my room is being forcefully ripped away from me and if I don't follow through with it I'll get endlessly judged for it.
After my final exam was over I was supposed to visit the only actual friend I have but that ended up falling through and now the friendship that made my life slightly less miserable for the past 3 years is crumbling apart.
It feels as if I have nothing except my pet left anymore. The one friend I had is gone, in 2 months I'll be forced to move out of my parents home to go to the big city and live alone and I'm terrified.
I have grown increasingly paranoid that my pet parrot is going to be taken away from me before im able to bring him with me to college. It really feels like a divine force wants to make sure that nothing in my life stays consistent anymore.
I have no idea what I will do with my life after college, I can't imagine a future for myself that isn't pure fantasy and sometimes I feel as if I'm just not meant to live into proper adulthood.
Even if I don't end up ctb-ing I feel like God will make sure I don't live past 25 eitherway, I'm just not meant for it.
I've been seeing a psychiatrist and a psychologist for about 3 months now after my mental health got bad enough to where my family couldn't deny it anymore.
I've also been prescribed zoloft wich I've been taking for a little over a month but I feel as if u almost got worse.
Both my psychiatrist and psychologist give out advice you can find in q buzzfeed article and I don't feel comfortable fully opening up to either of them.
I was in an incredible bad place mentally due to my final exam and college entrance and it feels like all the comfort I managed to build up over the years by just rotting in my room is being forcefully ripped away from me and if I don't follow through with it I'll get endlessly judged for it.
After my final exam was over I was supposed to visit the only actual friend I have but that ended up falling through and now the friendship that made my life slightly less miserable for the past 3 years is crumbling apart.
It feels as if I have nothing except my pet left anymore. The one friend I had is gone, in 2 months I'll be forced to move out of my parents home to go to the big city and live alone and I'm terrified.
I have grown increasingly paranoid that my pet parrot is going to be taken away from me before im able to bring him with me to college. It really feels like a divine force wants to make sure that nothing in my life stays consistent anymore.
I have no idea what I will do with my life after college, I can't imagine a future for myself that isn't pure fantasy and sometimes I feel as if I'm just not meant to live into proper adulthood.
Even if I don't end up ctb-ing I feel like God will make sure I don't live past 25 eitherway, I'm just not meant for it.