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Ventingfriends
Thread starteryearned
Start date
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i used to have a bunch of friends, people who could show up randomly at my place, people i could make plans with, i had a kind of support network. i dont have this anymore, i have two main friends, i dont see them a lot. one of them is an ex who is friends with people i used to be friends with. i envy them for having friends.
Reactions:
gayboy300, f1rebender, LastDayOnEarth and 2 others
I used to have a bunch of really good caring friends, and it took me such a long time to make it work, i really love them and they made me happy.
But 6 months ago i ghosted everyone and stopped all communication, because i thoroughly want to ctb and don't have the courage to preted and face them.
It hurts cuz sometimes because they send messages to say they think about me or they care but i freeze, i can't say a word, i just wanna go.
And knowing how long in my life it took to create bonds like that only for them to be ruined by my own action adds even more salt to the wound...
personally i know that i wont be missed, people will be relieved for me. it's something ive wanted for so long. some people will probably be amused. most people won't care.
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