J

jake3d

Enlightened
May 29, 2019
1,033
I've reviewed the news and there have been four suicides on the tube train in my city this year, with a fifth person that was pulled away before they could jump. It's messy and it'll leave other people scarred, too, but i'm deteriorating at such a rapid pace i don't think I even have time to wait for my ordered SN to get here, and it's pretty much guaranteed - one person got so mangled they had trouble determining whether male or female! Gruesome.

I've screwed up so much stuff but i think i can get this one right.
 
  • Hugs
  • Aww..
  • Wow
Reactions: Lifeisatrap, Sunset764, Scribble Fan and 3 others
G

GarageLizard

Member
Jun 2, 2019
9
I'd really advise against it ...

Whilst it is completely understandable that you wish to die, please consider that this would cause a lot of damage to others. There will be many traumatized witnesses, the potential for body parts to hit people and not to mention chaotic train delays.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Lifeisatrap, memento_mori and Walilamdzi
J

jake3d

Enlightened
May 29, 2019
1,033
I've gone thru two of those delays myself. I can easily slip inside the tunnel like someone else did, that way witnesses/traumatized people will be minimized to the driver.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Lifeisatrap
G

GarageLizard

Member
Jun 2, 2019
9
I've gone thru two of those delays myself. I can easily slip inside the tunnel like someone else did, that way witnesses/traumatized people will be minimized to the driver.

Mm. Unlike forensic clean up teams, train drivers are not generally prepared for this sort of situation. It's cruel for them.

It can cause lifelong trauma, even if it is to just one person. Plus, the passengers would still know and more than likely catch a glimpse.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Lifeisatrap, memento_mori, tiredandhuddledmass and 1 other person
W

Walilamdzi

.
Mar 21, 2019
1,700
I watched a documentary where a tube driver was so traumatised he never worked as a driver again and had to move out of the city because of post-traumatic stress resulting from the incident... Why choose such a method, if you have SN on the way?
 
  • Like
Reactions: Lifeisatrap and tiredandhuddledmass
J

jake3d

Enlightened
May 29, 2019
1,033
Why choose such a method, if you have SN on the way?

Well, i almost ran out of my benzos, and even with my prescribed dose i was able to sleep for 2 hrs the past few nights. Getting a doctor appointment here is slow, i don't know any pill dealers, and i wanna die, but not of benzo withdrawal, lol.
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
Reactions: Lifeisatrap and Soul
G

GarageLizard

Member
Jun 2, 2019
9
Well, i almost ran out of my benzos, and even with my prescribed dose i was able to sleep for 2 hrs the past few nights. Getting a doctor appointment here is slow, i don't know any pill dealers, and i wanna die, but not of benzo withdrawal, lol.

Have you tried Pregabalin / Gabapentin? It's a fantastic alternative to opiod-based painkillers and makes a world of difference provided they're not abused.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Lifeisatrap
J

jake3d

Enlightened
May 29, 2019
1,033
I had the opportunity to swipe some more gabapentin but didn't, sadly. Either way, I did have some stashed away, it got me out of trouble once a few years ago. I have tried it a couple times since this crap happened... and it doesn't do anything.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Lifeisatrap
G

GarageLizard

Member
Jun 2, 2019
9
I had the opportunity to swipe some more gabapentin but didn't, sadly. Either way, I did have some stashed away, it got me out of trouble once a few years ago. I have tried it a couple times since this crap happened... and it doesn't do anything.

Gabapentin is a weaker version of Pregabalin. You might have needed a higher dose. Anything is worth a shot.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Lifeisatrap and jake3d
tiredandhuddledmass

tiredandhuddledmass

Member
May 21, 2019
17
@jake3d Please don't use the train option. It is well known that it can affect drivers severely, many never work again (in any capacity) and are psychologically destroyed. You are doing to others what was probably done to you to push you to the point you are at in the first place, namely inflicting trauma on innocent people who cannot escape or protect themselves. Don't continue the cycle. There are driverless trains nowadays, e.g. at airports.

As it happens I also once took a bottle of Gabapentin (minus one or two pills I had taken when it was initially prescribed). I threw up most of it, although not immediately. From what entered my system I only got a lot of tingling in the hands and some numbness.
 
  • Like
Reactions: ExhaustedPigeon
J

jake3d

Enlightened
May 29, 2019
1,033
You guys are kinda right from an ethical standpoint, besides, my exit method of choice has already shipped and i have to wait for it, here's to hoping the antiemetics ship soon as well.

In the meantime, i'll study the table of forbidden chemicals in my country - i've mined some Monero a couple years back and now i have a good reason to spend them - acquiring some sort of benzos off the darknet. :wink:
 
  • Like
Reactions: Lifeisatrap
GeorgeJL

GeorgeJL

Enlightened
Mar 7, 2019
1,621
Please don't do this. I heard of someone that was a train conductor and someone got splattered on the front of his train. This caused the conductor to get PTSD which eventually lead to him committing suicide.

I am not convinced that jumping in front of a train is painless because there will be cells left with oxygen, blood, and neurotransmitters. Pain is not only processed by a module in the brain but also pain is localized in each cell.

There are many other better methods that don't require much money at all. PM me if you want to discuss them.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Faraway1990
J

jake3d

Enlightened
May 29, 2019
1,033
Money no problem, just need to get my hands on more benzos real quick so i can keep (somewhat) sleeping with this ridiculous pain, as i've found nothing that'll touch it yet. Will see if i can get codeine, and my SN is on the way.
 
ExitTheDay

ExitTheDay

We fight to live or live to die
May 26, 2019
336
It's a really unforgiving way to CTB with so many consequences from being a mangled mess that could end you up in a wheelchair for the rest of your life to getting limbs torn off, and it is also terrible for the people that clean it up and the drivers that will face post traumatic stress for the rest of their lives
 
J

jake3d

Enlightened
May 29, 2019
1,033
Prescription solved. No trains for me. Waiting for my SN and meto...
 
  • Like
Reactions: Lifeisatrap

Similar threads

Zecko
Replies
7
Views
559
Suicide Discussion
aloicious
A
LonelyKitten
Replies
33
Views
6K
Suicide Discussion
iloverachel
I
Octavia
Replies
28
Views
4K
Suicide Discussion
jarik
jarik