Venting floating

[roseleaf]

is this good news? i am not sure. but i am venting more often -- only here, of course.
it still takes a lot of energy to even decide to start typing and open up this forum.

i sometimes feel like i am a floater in the world because i am able to hang out with most people without judgement which i am really grateful for. i know a lot of people can't do that. i can float around from person to person i can't tell if they like me or not but they tolerate me. i can talk to the "popular" people and also the geeky people at the college and shi.

my opinions on most matters are simply that it doesn't matter. to me, at least.
do i care about the church? not really, but some people do.
do i think school is important? not to me, but it is to some people.

impartial, perhaps? i think i am just lazy.
all i do is listen and feel nothing. i like reading, it gives me something to do. read about the mind so i can find out why we are how we are. i think that our brains have a reason for everything but it might just be my own denial because i feel like i have no reason to be around. i want an excuse for why i can't do anything with my life.

current findings : nothing. i am just lazy.

i always feel like i am floating, a second away from leaving this earth and going somewhere else. i think its best to be the one everyone knows but is always in the background before i go.

how would i end this without a thank you? thank you for reading xx

 

[quwroflucilfer3]

I sympathize. Its important to remember two things. The first is that everyone is focused on themselves and their own life. Everyone is the main character of their own movie, so when it seems like people don't care about you don't take it personally. The second is that we evolved to be lazy. Our ape ancestors spent hundreds of thousands of years lying around and eating. Today's capitalist workaholic lifestyle is such a foreign and unnatural/unhealthy way of life. It is only natural to be depressed.