Lara Francis
Enlightened
- Jun 30, 2018
- 1,627
Hi
I am feeling so sad and guilty tonight.
I have cried multiple times but managed to avoid my go to coping mechanism of SH somehow.
I have been pre occupied and very focused in fighting to get my son back and i should be the most happy person ever but the massive dark ,empty void stills lies within.
My reality is of the repetitive feeling of just living for my boy and not me.
I dont want to live but i dont want him to be on his own.
I hate myself for feeling like this but i cant seem to shake this pattern of thinking.
My desire to live is weaker than my one to go.
I am such a bitch.!
I dont know how many times you can feel like this without it being the last one.
X
I am feeling so sad and guilty tonight.
I have cried multiple times but managed to avoid my go to coping mechanism of SH somehow.
I have been pre occupied and very focused in fighting to get my son back and i should be the most happy person ever but the massive dark ,empty void stills lies within.
My reality is of the repetitive feeling of just living for my boy and not me.
I dont want to live but i dont want him to be on his own.
I hate myself for feeling like this but i cant seem to shake this pattern of thinking.
My desire to live is weaker than my one to go.
I am such a bitch.!
I dont know how many times you can feel like this without it being the last one.
X
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