Story Failed Recovery

[Moroze]

I'm 22, and I feel like I've already lived a lifetime of trying to "get better".

Doctors, meds, therapy, diet changes, exercise, journaling, meditation, gratitude lists, new routines, new environments, you name it. Everyone says healing takes time, that effort pays off, that positivity matters. But I've done everything I was supposed to do, and I still feel broken in ways I can't fix.

It's exhausting to keep hoping when every "next thing" turns out to be another dead end. I'm not lazy. I'm not ungrateful. I'm just tired, tired of chasing recovery like it's something I can earn if I try hard enough.

Sometimes I wish people understood that not every story of struggle ends in a neat little comeback. Some of us are still here, still trying, still breathing, even when nothing helps. And maybe that's enough for now.

 

[imontheloose]

Some of us just weren't meant to be alive and that is the sad truth. No amount of intervention will fix that fundamental violation.

 

[yourlucy]

Has love helped for you, or was it the thing that ruined everything? I'm very sorry for your suffering regardless, i have had to take care of my loved one who has left me recently and he also tried everything to get better and has told me countless times of how tired he was of life in general, and it made me feel horrible cause i thought it was my fault all along even tho i tried so hard for him everyday, i know how exhausting it is to even do the smallest things like waking up and breathing, it can feel suffocating at times and makes u not even want to get up, its not lazyness its just hopelessness and losing touch with reality at times, thats how i see it, i do wish you the best tho, i hope tomorrow you get to enjoy a great cup of tea/coffee/chocolate milk anything that gives comfort.
btw it's okay for life not to get "better", moments that you decide in life make it enjoyable, like go spoil yourself and make yourself feel good, or try to take care of someone/something like a little bonsai, a flower, a little pet it'll give you energy cause their life will depend on you, and for me it kinda gives me hope to continue my life for them i don't know if you'll find this of any use but i hope my stupid silly little words can help you somehow

 

[Owlers]

I feel this on a level I wish I didn't. I'm 20. I've been through therapy, been through medications, been through institutions or rehabs and done the programs. I've reached out, I've stayed done all these step by steps on how to get better, and sometimes it feels like I'm holding on to a future I have absolutely no proof of existing. Like there is no getting better, there's only surviving. I got to the point of hating talking to people about my head because I was getting the same information. It was like I reached a point where I heard it all, and all I could think was,, there's no way I've reached the extent. Theres no way there's not more meds, more therapy, more coping, more anything. Theres no way I've reached the point where I just exist in this cycle now and hope it magically works some day.

And maybe we have. Maybe we aren't ever going to be completely content and happy and 'better'. And maybe thats okay. Maybe waking up and trying is enough. Maybe we only smile once a day. Once a week. And maybe thats alright.

 

[homeboundcripple]

I'm 22, and I feel like I've already lived a lifetime of trying to "get better".

Doctors, meds, therapy, diet changes, exercise, journaling, meditation, gratitude lists, new routines, new environments, you name it. Everyone says healing takes time, that effort pays off, that positivity matters. But I've done everything I was supposed to do, and I still feel broken in ways I can't fix.

It's exhausting to keep hoping when every "next thing" turns out to be another dead end. I'm not lazy. I'm not ungrateful. I'm just tired, tired of chasing recovery like it's something I can earn if I try hard enough.

Sometimes I wish people understood that not every story of struggle ends in a neat little comeback. Some of us are still here, still trying, still breathing, even when nothing helps. And maybe that's enough for now.

What was the new diet you tried?

 

[SoulCage]

I am 33 and had problems to cope with exhaustion and pressure since senior years. When I was your age I kinda pushed through by hoping "one day I will reach conditions that make life easier for me". They never came. I always pushed and now have a history that help organisations see as a "successful" life and my current condition just a matter of attitude.
They are not even giving me recovery solutions, because they think I am not "broken enough" to receive help.
I don't know why I went so deep venting about my recent conclusions..
Probably because I am a little jealous of you for even given the opportunity to try it. I will never know it seems like (unless I survive a CTB attempt, maybe then they will take me serious).
Nonetheless... I also feel sad to know that even people, who tried everything, are still not able to recover, meaning what's the point anyway? Sorry you have reached the end of the line. It's good to have the knowledge sooner than later.

 

[Ashes of a Dreamer]

The same as you, but with one difference: I'm older than you more than 1 decade. I'm beyond exhausted, and have already decided: if things still didn't work out the way I supposed, I won't stay here anymore. In your case, if you want to give life one more shot, all I can think is trying different things - a different doc, med, therapy, etc. - and indeed it's a process that takes time and requires effort. The bitter truth, however, is: there isn't a solution that lasts forever.