End of the line for me...

[Freedom Believer]

Well, today is when I attempt to CTB. Using the "night-night method". Got the "sweet spot" ready. Waiting for my Dad to go to sleep and then I will relax and take my time to end it. Worst case scenario I'll try again tomorrow night. Hopefully, with the time I pass out I'll have a nice vision of someone or something before I go to the light either to the afterlife or to nothing.

Maybe I can finally remove the facade I've been keeping for so long. I just want to thank all of you for how kind and welcoming you've been to me. I've asked so many questions and they've been answered.

 

[134340]

Safe travels, I wish you peace on the other side

 

[Freedom Believer]

Safe travels, I wish you peace on the other side ♥

Thank you.

 

[Egddios]

The 'Night-Night' method was my original plan, I still think of it as one of the more peaceful ways to go.

Wishing you peace and freedom from suffering.

 

[Freedom Believer]

The 'Night-Night' method was my original plan, I still think of it as one of the more peaceful ways to go.

Wishing you peace and freedom from suffering.

I agree. It's just finding the positioning that will be difficult. Hopefully I get it the first time, after that it's just putting a little pressure and you pass out and die peacefully.

I thank you for your kind words.

 

[realjunes]

Oh Freedom Believer,
I see you joined us only 3 days ago. Have you been reading our forum before that? I wish we knew you longer and if you wanted to, we could share stories, ideas, and sort through all the feelings and experiences you have that brought you to this decision. But I respect you and I truly hope you get that vision you mentioned and is the most wonderful one you could ever wish for. You deserve that. And, please know, that if you are unable to for any reason at all, we would be so pleased to have you back with us on the forum. Overnight you will have my support and wish for love and peace for you.

 

[Freedom Believer]

Oh Freedom Believer,
I see you joined us only 3 days ago. Have you been reading our forum before that? I wish we knew you longer and if you wanted to, we could share stories, ideas, and sort through all the feelings and experiences you have that brought you to this decision. But I respect you and I truly hope you get that vision you mentioned and is the most wonderful one you could ever wish for. You deserve that. And, please know, that if you are unable to for any reason at all, we would be so pleased to have you back with us on the forum. Overnight you will have my support and wish for love and peace for you.

I was lurking for a couple of days before I joined. I've expressed why I'm CTBing in another thread.

I thank you for the kindness you've put in your post. If I fail, I've got other plans in case the method doesn't work out, but hopefully I won't have to rely on them. I want to go out painlessly and as peacefully as possible.

 

[Pan]

Well, today is when I attempt to CTB. Using the "night-night method". Got the "sweet spot" ready. Waiting for my Dad to go to sleep and then I will relax and take my time to end it. Worst case scenario I'll try again tomorrow night. Hopefully, with the time I pass out I'll have a nice vision of someone or something before I go to the light either to the afterlife or to nothing.

Maybe I can finally remove the facade I've been keeping for so long. I just want to thank all of you for how kind and welcoming you've been to me. I've asked so many questions and they've been answered.

Although I don't know you, does it bother you to know that I LOVE YOU? I know you will live again as yourself, renewed and strengthened for the life to come.

 

[Carina]

I hope it goes as you want -- if not, we'll be here regardless. I hope you find some peace from it

 

[Freedom Believer]

Although I don't know you, does it bother you to know that I LOVE YOU? I know you will live again as yourself, renewed and strengthened for the life to come.

It's nice to know that I feel love from someone other than family. Until my Dad finds me and probably wants to throw my body in the river.

I hope it goes as you want -- if not, we'll be here regardless. I hope you find some peace from it

Thank you, peace is all I want and I hope to find it on the other side. If it's an afterlife or not, I'll take it. Just no more stress and no more pain.

 

[Jean4]

Sending you lots of love. You aren't alone and we are here if you want to talk.

 

[FullyUnplugged]

New here also. first time seeing a goodbye thread. Wishing you peace.

 

[Freedom Believer]

Sending you lots of love. You aren't alone and we are here if you want to talk.

Thank you for the love. Just going to listen to some videos and that will put me at ease.

 

[BlueWidow]

I hope you have an enjoyable last vision and find the peace and freedom from suffering that you seek. I'm sorry you weren't here longer so that we could get to know you better. I'll keep you in my thoughts and we'll all be here if you need us.

 

[Pan]

I blame technology for much of it; as a boomer not born into it, I have a better perspective on its destructive effects. So much data, so much delivery, I could vomit. What was a trickle has turned into a torrent. There is NO private space available any longer; people no longer have the autonomy they did. Add to that invasive government, and its small wonder that the entire world seems to be more n the throes of madness.

 

[Freedom Believer]

New here also. first time seeing a goodbye thread. Wishing you peace.

Thank you. Hopefully you can find peace, whether it's via CTB or finding peace on this world I wish you the best.

I hope you have an enjoyable last vision and find the peace and freedom from suffering that you seek. I'm sorry you weren't here longer so that we could get to know you better. I'll keep you in my thoughts and we'll all be here if you need us.

I wish I found the site sooner and if I wasn't so desperate I would've had more time to be here. Thank you for your words.

 

[Carina]

Oh good, you're still reading -- I typed my last reply quick just in case.

If you did want to talk, we'd all listen too--just like Jean4 said.

But if your mind is made up, I do hope you find peace. Just know we're all here, you aren't alone.

 

[Freedom Believer]

I blame technology for much of it; as a boomer not born into it, I have a better perspective on its destructive effects. So much data, so much delivery, I could vomit. What was a trickle has turned into a torrent. There is NO private space available any longer; people no longer have the autonomy they did. Add to that invasive government, and its small wonder that the entire world seems to be more n the throes of madness.

The world has gotten worse. People are miserable and they have no ways of ending the pain without passing through major hurdles. Your path for a normal life requires 4-years-college with a bunch a debt to only get a 13 or 14 dollar an hour job because every other job needs 5 years experience and a bunch of certifications. There used to be a time where they trained people, but that's too much work today. Money makes the world go round and we no longer have empathy for others struggling. I'm 19 and I see it for what it is. My Dad is stuck in a time where college would get you a great job. College is no guarantee and it's harder than ever to get on your feet.

Oh good, you're still reading -- I typed my last reply quick just in case.

If you did want to talk, we'd all listen too--just like Jean4 said.

But if your mind is made up, I do hope you find peace. Just know we're all here, you aren't alone.

I've got time. My Dad is at the movies with his girlfriend. He's probably hanging out with her before coming here. It won't take long for him to fall asleep. The sad thing is that his girlfriend is a sweet woman. She's the closest I've had to a mother since my mother has dementia and I can't see her in that state, especially with my own thoughts.

 

[Pan]

You said it exactly. Meanwhile, the Fed refuses to ease up on the interest. What is the point of getting educated, I ask you? So you can end up slinging burgers at McDonald's? As a boomer, I was fortunate to get an undergrad and graduate school degree; that was in the eighties...I certainly could'nt do it now. This country will pay a heavy price someday for neglecting its college grads!

 

[Jean4]

The world has gotten worse. People are miserable and they have no ways of ending the pain without passing through major hurdles. Your path for a normal life requires 4-years-college with a bunch a debt to only get a 13 or 14 dollar an hour job because every other job needs 5 years experience and a bunch of certifications. There used to be a time where they trained people, but that's too much work today. Money makes the world go round and we no longer have empathy for others struggling. I'm 19 and I see it for what it is. My Dad is stuck in a time where college would get you a great job. College is no guarantee and it's harder than ever to get on your feet.

I've got time. My Dad is at the movies with his girlfriend. He's probably hanging out with her before coming here. It won't take long for him to fall asleep. The sad thing is that his girlfriend is a sweet woman. She's the closest I've had to a mother since my mother has dementia and I can't see her in that state, especially with my own thoughts.

I'm not trying to stop you, but what's going on that you want to CTB?

 

[Carina]

I've got time. My Dad is at the movies with his girlfriend. He's probably hanging out with her before coming here. It won't take long for him to fall asleep. The sad thing is that his girlfriend is a sweet woman. She's the closest I've had to a mother since my mother has dementia and I can't see her in that state, especially with my own thoughts.

I'd say that has to be hard, but that's probably stating the obvious at this point isn't it?

The world does pretty much suck for jobs/college, not going to lie. I have 3 associates, bachelor's and masters. And I"m in a job that technically an associates is in, but it was really like a certificate addon to the associates.

I'm in no way trying to stop you here, what did you want to do for a job? (

 

[Freedom Believer]

I'm not trying to stop you, but what's going on that you want to CTB?

We talked before, I changed my profile picture so my apologies. I thought I would go later, but things are getting desperate so I need to do this.

Previous Talk

 

[Jean4]

We talked before, I changed my profile picture so my apologies. I thought I would go later, but things are getting desperate so I need to do this.

Previous Talk

And what happened that made you desperate? I personally don't feel comfortable not preparing.

 

[Freedom Believer]

I'd say that has to be hard, but that's probably stating the obvious at this point isn't it?

The world does pretty much suck for jobs/college, not going to lie. I have 3 associates, bachelor's and masters. And I"m in a job that technically an associates is in, but it was really like a certificate addon to the associates.

I'm in no way trying to stop you here, what did you want to do for a job? (

Being unrealistic would be YouTube. The only good thing I'm good at is video games and I joined back in 2009. If I could've been a part of the video game boom that happened later then it could've been a full time job that Dad might've not liked, but it would've gotten me money so he wouldn't have cared.

Realistically, probably something in writing.

And what happened that made you desperate? I personally don't feel comfortable not preparing.

Dropped all my classes in a way to make myself feel free. Soon the refund will show up in the bank statement and my Dad will see it and question it. I appreciate your worry, but I'm prepared and ready for this. Worst case scenario is that I do it tomorrow night.

 

[Jean4]

Being unrealistic would be YouTube. The only good thing I'm good at is video games and I joined back in 2009. If I could've been a part of the video game boom that happened later then it could've been a full time job that Dad might've not liked, but it would've gotten me money so he wouldn't have cared.

Realistically, probably something in writing.

Dropped all my classes in a way to make myself feel free. Soon the refund will show up in the bank statement and my Dad will see it and question it.

So the desperation is the refund coming in?

 

[Carina]

Being unrealistic would be YouTube. The only good thing I'm good at is video games and I joined back in 2009. If I could've been a part of the video game boom that happened later then it could've been a full time job that Dad might've not liked, but it would've gotten me money so he wouldn't have cared.

Realistically, probably something in writing.

Wait.... I swore someone else said that here... was that... you? (my mind is sometimes clouded, so apologies)

Writing... that was something I wanted to do since second grade until a teacher crushed my dreams. I almost always found it good even if for just personal use.

 

[Freedom Believer]

So the desperation is the refund coming in?

Yes because I'll have to make some BS excuse as to why I have all this money all of a sudden and he'll eventually see it's from the college and that I dropped those classes.

 

[Jean4]

Yes because I'll have to make some BS excuse as to why I have all this money all of a sudden and he'll eventually see it's from the college and that I dropped those classes.

You like video games. I thinking outside the box. Would designing video games interest you?

 

[Freedom Believer]

Wait.... I swore someone else said that here... was that... you?

Writing... that was something I wanted to do since second grade until a teacher crushed my dreams. I almost always found it good even if for just personal use.

Yeah, I've said that in a previous post. Funny thing about writing is that I hated it back in grade school, but I found a passion for it writing fanfiction (pathetic, I know but it wasn't smut or 'My Immortal' levels of bad). Maybe it could've been a path if I showed an interest to it earlier.

 

[Jean4]

Yeah, I've said that in a previous post. Funny thing about writing is that I hated it back in grade school, but I found a passion for it writing fanfiction (pathetic, I know but it wasn't smut or 'My Immortal' levels of bad). Maybe it could've been a path if I showed an interest to it earlier.

You can make a living doing fan fiction. Especially with conventions.