Help Drug cocktail that is likely to end in death, all suggestions welcome

[jajajamielee]

I don't care how I die anymore, so list anything honestly. Just give me ideas. The current medications I am on are Adderall XR, Cyproheptadine, Fludrocortisone, some beta blocker I can't remember the name of, some sleep meds I can't remember the name of, doses of Sodium Chloride in the morning and at night and as needed, and I think that's it. I'll update if I can get the names, I'm not allowed to be around my meds for reasons that are probably obvious.

 

[Cress]

It's really difficult to use medications to catch the bus. Even if you had medications that are considered toxic in high amounts with alcohol the chances of success are extremely low. We are talking 10% at best but more likely Two or three percent. There is some drugs that are better suited for catching the bus than others Mainly benzodiazepines And opioids but I don't think they should be considered very reliable. There is also illegal drugs which I can't really comment on but they should be equally considered just as Unreliable. Also if you're going to go out of your way to acquire An illegal drug for the purpose of overdose there's probably better stuff to try to go after.

I have a family member that's always told me if he wanted to catch the bus he would just buy a bunch of heroin and flood his body with it. It works for some people I guess.

 

[jajajamielee]

It's really difficult to use medications to catch the bus. Even if you had medications that are considered toxic in high amounts with alcohol the chances of success are extremely low. We are talking 10% at best but more likely Two or three percent. There is some drugs that are better suited for catching the bus than others Mainly benzodiazepines And opioids but I don't think they should be considered very reliable. There is also illegal drugs which I can't really comment on but they should be equally considered just as Unreliable.

I'm not talking just plain toxic amounts. I'm talking overkill, I'm talking entire bottles, I'm talking vodka, beer, I'm talking obnoxious amounts of all of it.

 

[Cress]

I'm not talking just plain toxic amounts. I'm talking overkill, I'm talking entire bottles, I'm talking vodka, beer, I'm talking obnoxious amounts of all of it.

The issue with spamming all of that Which a lot of people don't think about is it's going to upset your stomach. You're going to involuntarily start vomiting stuff up. You have a budget for swallowing things that are toxic, once you exceed that budget, You vomit. Even SN which is recommended on this website has a triggered vomit response.

So yeah you could swallow all kinds of toxic amounts and go overkill as you said but you're just going to vomit most Variations of drugs and alcohol up. There could be some variation that would work for your specific Height and weight but it's just impractical to actually figure out. You're likely to have numerous failed attempts Before your ever successful.

I hope this answers why taking everything in your medication Cabinet all at once is unreliable. I know this probably isn't the answer you were hoping for though.

 

[jajajamielee]

The issue with spamming all of that Which a lot of people don't think about is it's going to upset your stomach. You're going to involuntarily start vomiting stuff up. You have a budget for swallowing things that are toxic, once you exceed that budget, You vomit. Even SN which is recommended on this website has a triggered vomit response.

So yeah you could swallow all kinds of toxic amounts and go overkill as you said but you're just going to vomit most Variations of drugs and alcohol up. There could be some variation that would work for your specific Height and weight but it's just impractical to actually figure out. You're likely to have numerous failed attempts Before your ever successful.

I hope this answers why taking everything in your medication Cabinet all at once is unreliable. I know this probably isn't the answer you were hoping for though.

What if I 1. Put duct tape over my mouth and nose and 2. Took the tranquilizers first and then take everything else after the tranquilizers so I will be asleep when I start puking but unable to tear off the tape? Alternatively, I have a friend who may be willing to give me stronger sedatives if I swear I won't be found in time for my corpse to be identifiable. That detail, however, is squared away and guaranteed.
And to clarify, I would put the duct tape on last, obviously. Not only will I have the toxic drugs in my system, but hopefully if that doesn't kill me, choking on my own puke will. The stronger sedatives are hopefully for keeping me asleep during all of it.
Again, another clarification, I would obviously give the sedative ample time to kick in somewhat.

 

[Cress]

What if I 1. Put duct tape over my mouth and nose and 2. Took the tranquilizers first and then take everything else after the tranquilizers so I will be asleep when I start puking but unable to tear off the tape? Alternatively, I have a friend who may be willing to give me stronger sedatives if I swear I won't be found in time for my corpse to be identifiable. That detail, however, is squared away and guaranteed.
And to clarify, I would put the duct tape on last, obviously. Not only will I have the toxic drugs in my system, but hopefully if that doesn't kill me, choking on my own puke will. The stronger sedatives are hopefully for keeping me asleep during all of it.

If you put duct tape over your mouth sufficient enough to block vomit then to be honest you probably don't need all of those fancy drugs since you're just going to choke on your own vomit. Suffocating to death on your own vomit is going to be extremely unpleasant But yes of course it's going to work.

You should know however that your survival instinct to breathe and clear your airway is one of the strongest survival instincts that you have. The urge to remove the duct tape and clear your airway is going to be unbearable. Not that much different from putting your head underwater.

You're your own person of course but I would greatly discourage you from intentionally choking to death As you're going to suffer Horrifically.

 

[jajajamielee]

And again, I genuinely don't care how I die. I know choking on your own vomit knowingly in your sleep sounds disgusting, but living is the worst case scenario to me now, not a painful or slow death. As long as something kills me, I no longer give two shits.

If you put duct tape over your mouth sufficient enough to block vomit then to be honest you probably don't need all of those fancy drugs since you're just going to choke on your own vomit. Suffocating to death on your own vomit is going to be extremely unpleasant But yes of course it's going to work.

You should know however that your survival instinct to breathe and clear your airway is one of the strongest survival instincts that you have. The urge to remove the duct tape and clear your airway is going to be unbearable. Not that much different from putting your head underwater.

You're your own person of course but I would greatly discourage you from intentionally choking to death As you're going to suffer Horrifically.

I'm going to be asleep during all that, ideally. Again, I plan on getting drunk (yeah I'm not 21 yet, sue me, if this works who cares) then taking the tranquilizers/sedatives before the other stuff and letting them have time to kick in, at least until I'm a bit drowsy, then I'll take the pre-made drug cocktail and wait until I'm definitely about to fall asleep to put on the duct tape n shit. Just as another precaution I might wear a sweatshirt and take my arms out of the sleeves before i knock out so it'll be harder for me to struggle while I'm asleep. (these are like, hella strong sedatives my friend plans on giving me, I just have to get to the spot first.)

At least I'll get to try vodka before I die. 19 is close enough.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

If you're adamant about killing yourself, seriously, you need a better way.

 

[jajajamielee]

If you're adamant about killing yourself, seriously, you need a better way.

Then how should I, hypothetically speaking?

 

[DoubleUp8]

It's really difficult to use medications to catch the bus. Even if you had medications that are considered toxic in high amounts with alcohol the chances of success are extremely low. We are talking 10% at best but more likely Two or three percent. There is some drugs that are better suited for catching the bus than others Mainly benzodiazepines And opioids but I don't think they should be considered very reliable. There is also illegal drugs which I can't really comment on but they should be equally considered just as Unreliable. Also if you're going to go out of your way to acquire An illegal drug for the purpose of overdose there's probably better stuff to try to go after.

I have a family member that's always told me if he wanted to catch the bus he would just buy a bunch of heroin and flood his body with it. It works for some people I guess.

Benzodiazipines aren't lethal. You're right about 2-3 percent number. I keep telling people here to have realistic chance you need fentanyl or some of these new synthetic opioids. Nitazines I think they are called. Several different names for em. And you need to iv or im inject to have a reasonable probability of success. Having trouble with phone and site and this is when it duplicates messages. I hate 21st century technology!

 

[jajajamielee]

Benzodiazipines aren't lethal. You're right about 2-3 percent number. I keep telling people here to have realistic chance you need fentanyl or some of these new synthetic opioids. Nitazines I think they are called. Several different names for em. And you need to iv or im inject to have a reasonable probability of success. Having trouble with phone and site and this is when it duplicates messages. I hate 21st century technology!

Well, I don't have access to fent. What else can I do, then?

 

[DoubleUp8]

Well, I don't have access to fent. What else can I do, then?

Try different ways besides drugs which you'd probably have to anyway if you can't get all your drugs at once. You sound like you're young though so don't rush into it and try anything and everything else 1st before ctb. Think long and hard about it and if you decide it's the only way think about how you're going to do it. Whatever way you do it, you want to work. The worst thing is failed attempt you can't play off. Like using drugs you can always say "no I wasn't trying to commit suicide. I was trying to get high". Psych ward for a long time ironically isn't good for your mental health.

 

[jajajamielee]

Try different ways besides drugs which you'd probably have to anyway if you can't get all your drugs at once. You sound like you're young though so don't rush into it and try anything and everything else 1st before ctb. Think long and hard about it and if you decide it's the only way think about how you're going to do it. Whatever way you do it, you want to work. The worst thing is failed attempt you can't play off. Like using drugs you can always say "no I wasn't trying to commit suicide. I was trying to get high". Psych ward for a long time ironically isn't good for your mental health.

I am young, but I've had passive SI for longer than I can remember, which honestly isn't more than bits and pieces of my life, yet recently I've been more and more open to the possibility of actually ending it. It was a very violent shift at first if I'm being honest, initially my first thought was "I can kill myself in ANY way," and that led to me idealizing more gruesome methods, but now I've just adopted the idea that if it kills me, yay, but ideally quicker deaths are preferred, with slower, more painful methods still being good alternatives.

I am young, but I've had passive SI for longer than I can remember, which honestly isn't more than bits and pieces of my life, yet recently I've been more and more open to the possibility of actually ending it. It was a very violent shift at first if I'm being honest, initially my first thought was "I can kill myself in ANY way," and that led to me idealizing more gruesome methods, but now I've just adopted the idea that if it kills me, yay, but ideally quicker deaths are preferred, with slower, more painful methods still being good alternatives.

If I had to elaborate, my childhood was not really a childhood. My mother was not present and my dad is a huge narcissist. He was a big fan of threatening me, verbal abuse, and general fear instilling. I was ridiculed for crying, punished for having good points against anything said regardless of whether or not I was intending to speak against him. I was just constantly in pain and even denied medical care at times. Non-behavioral therapy was basically a privilege I had to earn.
All in all, the only years I had to create the life I'd have to live out was ruined from the very start, and I don't feel the urge to finish it. I never have, and likely never will. It may seem a very bland reason for me to kill myself, but at the cost of sounding emo or some shit, I just feel empty. I used to love the idea of starting a family, but then I realized I'm not capable of that, and I don't want to bring a child into the world in this day and age anyway. Even if I tried to give them all the love I could, what if I messed up? Or what if I succeeded, and yet they still somehow, one day, wound up here as I did? I don't want to live or be a part of anything that living entails, so the only other choice is to die.

 

[FakeSmileGuy]

you could try something to do with drowning, like the shallow water blackout technique. (https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/shallow-water-blackout.101163/)

you could also try duct taping your hands and feet so u cant move and just hop into water, it'll be extremely painful, but it's straightforward and will work.

Good luck with whatever u decide to go with man, also, i'm your age lol.

 

[DoubleUp8]

I tell all the younger people here to try anything and everything you can 1st. You don't owe that to anyone but yourself. If you still feel it's the only way you'll have few or maybe no regrets

 

[jajajamielee]

I tell all the younger people here to try anything and everything you can 1st. You don't owe that to anyone but yourself. If you still feel it's the only way you'll have few or maybe no regrets

Okay. I'll do more research. Thank you.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

IDK wat ur situation is or your means are. Peruse the Suicide Resource Compilation sticky on the first page of the Suicide forum and maybe you'll come up with something. This cocktail OD idea, though, just aint gonna get it. You'll just end up hurting yourself, probably get sectioned, too.