Preposterous! Barely more than half of these accusations are true! Look at my profile picture: Can those eyes lie?
Besides, he who is without sin...
You claim to be a clown, but there is not a single joke on your profile page! I joined this website only to read the jokes on your profile page, and now this!
I am going to decree your fate, a fate that will never come to an end for eternity. I will curse you with a Great Curse, may my curses overwhelm you suddenly, in an instant; may you not be able to make a household, and not be able to love a child of your own, may you not dwell in the presence of girls, may dregs of beer stain your beautiful lap, may a drunk soil your festal robe with vomit. May you never acquire anything of bright alabaster, may shining silver, man's delight, not be cast into your house, may a gateway be where you rake your pleasure, may a crossroad be your home, may a wasteland be your sleeping place, may the shadow of the city wall be your place to stand, may the thorns and briars skin your feet, may both the drunk and the dry slap you on the cheek, may owls nest in the cracks of your walls, and may no parties take place in your home!