No surprises
Member
- Jan 27, 2026
- 14
I am 18 years old. About two years ago, my memory started to fluctuate, and it was very poor most of the time. I couldn't remember plots of movies, books, and other things, which greatly impacted my studies as I was trying to study philosophy at the time. For some reason, it didn't significantly affect my normal life.
About a year later, I found that my writing ability and plot-planning ability also began to fluctuate. Before, I seemed unaware of the level of these abilities, and I don't know why. When my writing ability was poor, it was very difficult to organize language. At its best, my writing ability reached a level I had never achieved before, and the degree of this excellence varied. My memory seemed to have only two extremes: very bad and normal. Right now, I estimate my level is about 60% of my highest. I wanted to write this explanation now, so I didn't choose the best time to write it. My ability to conceive plots also showed a level of excellence I never had before, and the degree of ability seems uneven.
It may not be a problem with my anxiety disorder medication. Although my dosage has been decreasing—I used to take two tablets of aripiprazole and now have reduced to one—my cognitive ability doesn't improve as the medication decreases. I've never heard that medication can cause ability fluctuations rather than just poor stability. I take medication and have no other symptoms except for a slight shaking when my hands are stretched out.
I can write about my condition smoothly but have difficulty writing posts with social attributes. At the same time, I find it harder to forget knowledge related to memory and meditation than other things. I don't seem to have any physical symptoms, and my exercise ability is normal. The fluctuations in my ability seem unrelated to emotions.
This is the medical explanation I originally planned to write to my doctor. I've already seen the doctor twice but decided against giving it and went for another checkup. Both doctors said I was overthinking things. I wanted to ask if anyone else is experiencing the same thing. It would be great if someone could give me advice or a diagnosis.
Thank you everyone.
(I used a translator)
About a year later, I found that my writing ability and plot-planning ability also began to fluctuate. Before, I seemed unaware of the level of these abilities, and I don't know why. When my writing ability was poor, it was very difficult to organize language. At its best, my writing ability reached a level I had never achieved before, and the degree of this excellence varied. My memory seemed to have only two extremes: very bad and normal. Right now, I estimate my level is about 60% of my highest. I wanted to write this explanation now, so I didn't choose the best time to write it. My ability to conceive plots also showed a level of excellence I never had before, and the degree of ability seems uneven.
It may not be a problem with my anxiety disorder medication. Although my dosage has been decreasing—I used to take two tablets of aripiprazole and now have reduced to one—my cognitive ability doesn't improve as the medication decreases. I've never heard that medication can cause ability fluctuations rather than just poor stability. I take medication and have no other symptoms except for a slight shaking when my hands are stretched out.
I can write about my condition smoothly but have difficulty writing posts with social attributes. At the same time, I find it harder to forget knowledge related to memory and meditation than other things. I don't seem to have any physical symptoms, and my exercise ability is normal. The fluctuations in my ability seem unrelated to emotions.
This is the medical explanation I originally planned to write to my doctor. I've already seen the doctor twice but decided against giving it and went for another checkup. Both doctors said I was overthinking things. I wanted to ask if anyone else is experiencing the same thing. It would be great if someone could give me advice or a diagnosis.
Thank you everyone.
(I used a translator)
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i just suppose it doesn't matter to me bc i plan to die anyway.
