Do you guys have seconds thoughts when u think about ur family or friends?

[sewycidial]

Do you guys have seconds thoughts when u think about ur family or friends? I don't want to hurt them but i cant living my life anymore

 

[dggtscccvfd]

Do you guys have seconds thoughts when u think about ur family or friends? I don't want to hurt them but i cant living my life anymore

Of course, it's natural not to want to upset family and friends. Sadly, I am the same as you, I can't live my life anymore.

 

[Deleted member 65988]

Personally, I was conflicted early on but as time went on and as i went further into things, I became more adjusted to my decision realizing that there's nothing I'll be able to do after I ctb to change any reactions from anyone close to me. I'm not doing this with the goal of deliberately hurting them, I've just accepted that if I have to ctb then this is one of those trade-offs I'll have to make but that doesn't make it any easier when it comes to myself.

 

[Cara7177]

Do you guys have seconds thoughts when u think about ur family or friends? I don't want to hurt them but i cant living my life anymore

I'm estranged from family and my friends have all turned their backs on me. Fuck em.

 

[Life_and_Death]

i would need to have family and friends to think about in the first place

 

[sserafim]

My family doesn't care about me (as an individual), so I don't really care about hurting them. They've always just wanted me to do what I'm expected to, they've never considered that I'm a person/an individual with my own interests. Right now they view and regard me as a failure because I've become a hiki after college. My family wants to mold me into what society expects me to be, but that's not what I want for myself. They've never taken the time to understand me, they just want me to conform to societal expectations.

 

[NeverReallyHere]

All the time. It's probably the only reason I'm still alive.

 

[dragonofenvy]

I flip flop. The only person I've cared about is my father who's had it pretty rough. I don't want to hurt him, and only him. But I don't know if I can keep suffering just so he doesn't. There isn't anyone else I care about or who cares about me.

 

[Silent Raindrops]

For me, some of them are the reason I'm hellbent on doing it. The others, yea, I'm disappointed that they will be upset, but in time, they will forget.

 

[SoulofSteel]

Parents will definitely be hurt a lot, I used to want to hold off until they pass away, however I think it's gonna be sooner.

 

[Promised Heaven]

Absolutely.
My family loves me dearly and I hate to hurt them. Mental illness is extremely taboo in my family, so they'll be shunned or pretend I never existed.
Some of my friends look up to me and said I'd saved their life, it would be almost ironic.
One or two people I want to just do it just to say "See? I finally did it! Can you sleep happy now?!"

 

[MrFreshTheCat]

The only ones that worry me are my pets as i dont have friends and im not very attached to my family.

 

[TorchMyCorpse]

I used to, but then my friends abandoned me and my family became distant. Oh well.

 

[Thanksforeverything]

I don't really have second thoughts because I always knew that this is how it was going to end. But I fear how my family's going to react to my death every last breathing moment. All I can hope is that my notes somehow give them some peace of mind.

 

[lifeispain0216]

Do you guys have seconds thoughts when u think about ur family or friends? I don't want to hurt them but i cant living my life anymore

absolutely, this is the main thing thats been bothering me lately

 

[thinvy]

Not really. My friends have shown me that they're not really my friends, and my family doesn't care enough to keep up with me without me starting the conversation unless they need something from me.

I'm so tired lol

 

[archerfish]

Nope. They'll be fine without me. I'm mostly a burden and my friends are only online so it wouldn't make much of a difference.

 

[Guy Smiley]

Yes, constantly. I'd say my sadness and guilt over how much CTB would hurt my family is maybe the only reason I'm still alive.

I don't want to hurt them but i cant living my life anymore

That's exactly how I feel.

 

[SMmetalhead36]

Sometimes

 

[Leavesfromthevine]

I could care less. There is no such thing as true friendship or caring family imo. It's very easy to make people hate you. That person that's your reason to live right now could easily turn into the person that helped you overcome SI because of how they made you feel.

There's just too much risk in friends or family to care about how they feel. Their life will go on regardless.

 

[Scythe]

A little, but I'm way past the point of having it affect my decision at all. The friends I care about know why I'm doing this, the rest are distant and they'll assume I just stopped using my discord account or something. I doubt it'll bother them. It'll hurt my family, and I feel bad for some of them, the rest... Well some of them aren't good people.

 

[groucho]

The pain my death would cause them is the only reason I've not committed suicide for the past 25 years.

 

[onbekend]

There was a point in time where I would've reconsidered had I thought about my family,
but my mind is so far gone at this point that I rarely hesitate with my suicidal thoughts when I think about my family.
I used to think that my suicidal thoughts were intensified when I was alone, but as it turns out I am just as suicidal when with family members.
But despite my family members being right next to me, I don't feel any sense of hesitation in my body.

 

[Kit1]

I am only on this planet as I don't want my loved ones to be hurt.

Though right now, I wish I was dead and I wonder if today is the day I die or somehow whether I will be able.to survive another day for the sake of my loved ones.

 

[Deleted member 31858]

I don't care about anyone anymore. I can only think about my puppy.

 

[qu13t5l33p]

I have a loving family that never abused or mistreated me, but I don't care about their reaction. It's not important to me, as the desire to die takes a much higher precedent. I don't have any friends, but the prospect of making some does cause me some second thoughts about CTB. It's false and misplaced hope though, which makes the intrusion unwelcome.

 

[mortuarymary]

Of course we do, it's human nature to feel guilt.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I simply couldn't do it to my Dad, so I'm waiting for him to go first. Beyond that, it's step relations and distant family/ friends. I have pretty much deliberately tried to keep distance from most of them. It still worries me- of course but ultimately, is it fair to expect someone to keep living for people they never see and, next to never hear from? I hope they would understand.

 

[TiredOfAllThis]

I don't want to live for the sake of others. Enough is enough.

 

[waningmoth]

Not really, i used to but not anymore, but the one thing i cant do is leave family members with the debt from my impulsive spending last year so im here till thats sorted out as my elderly relatives are struggling with money themselves