NSFW Do you get bored/disgusted with sex?

[h0wd1rtygurlsST4Yc1n]

yes. men don't do it right and women are psychotic. and trying to find some one to sleep with is way more of a hassle than its worth.

 

[Tabbyql]

I feel the same sometimes, but i think mine it's more entitled to gender dysphoria (me being a FTM) and the fear of intimacy. I can remember all the other times i've had sex before, with people i trusted and felt good with and it was amazing, and those memories don't disgust me oor make me feel bad. But as soon as i picture myself trying to be intimate with anyone else again or showing my body in such ways or seeing my body in such ways does not only gives me a high feeling of disgust but also of sadness

I'm exactly the same aswell as struggling with my sexuality.

 

[Sh00]

I don't care enough about it to be disgusted. I'd probably place it above crochet in my list of favourite activities but that's about as much as I can say about it.

 

[quinn24]

Haven't had sex but I don't get bored with fapping, so I would imagine that sex wouldn't get boring. It would improve my mental health

 

[blanketyblk]

lesbian bed death is a thing... so yeah. can get bored of it. but not like it's a required pat of my life.

 

[Kikoo Loool]

I love sex but my wife and I made love foe the last time in lay 2015.

 

[Sabriel]

There were a few months this year where the very idea of sex was so repulsive to me it made be nauseous to even think about...probably because of past traumas and unstable self image.

 

[Juicebox]

I've never found sex appealing since the age of 14 or so. Maybe it's just past abuse of amphetamines talking, but sex just seems so brutal, and not like something you would do to someone you truly loved

 

[Krezo]

i want sex but don't get sex

 

[Painted Bird]

I don't care about sex anymore, my sex drive is almost non-existent now and I'm really glad about it, as I'm permanently single now. I don't even need to "fap" anymore. So yes, the idea of sex became boring/uninteresting to me. What I feel disgusted about is what people (well, mostly men) do to "get laid". Constant online and IRL hunting and abusing. Seeing how all those horny guys behave towards women is what fills me with disgust.

 

[thomasdoyletad]

Never could get into pornography. I prefer to write my own erotica. Used to be a member of some communities where people would work together on stories; take turns advancing the plot or play different characters. But it got depressing fast. People have no imagination and it was a constant reminder of how wildly far to the opposite of what's considered attractive people like me are. Also it's a great way to find out all about people's desires at their most primal, and that's some fucking ugly shit, but if you're ever in doubt that sex, for 99% of people (regardless of their sex) is almost entirely about power, entitlement and the commodification of humanity they're great places to cure that delusion, or if you've ever doubted that attraction is almost exclusively the result of genetic impulses fed-through the lizard-brain in which higher brain functions are only engaged to rationalise one's choices post-facto as having some sort of depth again you will be cured, and if you've ever doubted how pathetically susceptible people are to the halo bias again these are good places to get a reality fix. They give some glimpse into our gender dichotomy at its most naked, and it's something I find intolerable gross.

 

[thomasdoyletad]

I posted my original comment in the wrong thread, but it's still fairly relevant. It's here now. Although I was raped in my teens and sex/physical context can be triggery (and it doesn't help that I've also been assaulted, sexually and physically, in the two relationships I've ever had) I really have nothing against sex in abstract. If anything I've always had a very high sex-drive, and I enjoy sex in so far as I can enjoy it by way of my imagination.
However the cultural issues surrounding it disgust me. The power games, the entitlement, and the simple acknowledgement that men in my position have zero value in sexual or romantic terms do not endear me to the dating world in the slightest, and I have zero interest in patronising sex workers because it's all part of the same dynamic.

Besides which my imagination is more than enough to fulfil my sexual desires. What I do crave is intimacy and companionship which - for men - is more or less impossible to obtain without a sexual partner, but I'm pretty resigned to the fact that these things aren't going to be part of my life, and that any sex life I do have is probably going to be messed up mostly as a result of my issues.

 

[not_a_robot]

My hierarchy of Sexy to Gross is very different than most peoples', and unfortunately, if I really like someone, I tend to let them get away with being kinda gross.
Kissing is totally gross, but guys I love can do it to me all day and I don't care. Overall, sex is generally disgusting. I'm celibate now for two years though. I'm not sure if I'll ever have the energy for sex again, when masturbation is so much more convenient.

Never could get into pornography. I prefer to write my own erotica. Used to be a member of some communities where people would work together on stories; take turns advancing the plot or play different characters. But it got depressing fast. People have no imagination and it was a constant reminder of how wildly far to the opposite of what's considered attractive people like me are. Also it's a great way to find out all about people's desires at their most primal, and that's some fucking ugly shit, but if you're ever in doubt that sex, for 99% of people (regardless of their sex) is almost entirely about power, entitlement and the commodification of humanity they're great places to cure that delusion, or if you've ever doubted that attraction is almost exclusively the result of genetic impulses fed-through the lizard-brain in which higher brain functions are only engaged to rationalise one's choices post-facto as having some sort of depth again you will be cured, and if you've ever doubted how pathetically susceptible people are to the halo bias again these are good places to get a reality fix. They give some glimpse into our gender dichotomy at its most naked, and it's something I find intolerable gross.

Boy birds build nests and dance-display spaces full of shiny trinkets to attract girl birds. Boy bonobos are known to save up fruits and treats to give to girl bonobos in order to gain sexual favor. I'm just saying, if you want to bitch about the commodification of sex, be prepared to be pissed at the whole animal kingdom.

 

[After The End]

Boy birds build nests and dance-display spaces full of shiny trinkets to attract girl birds. Boy bonobos are known to save up fruits and treats to give to girl bonobos in order to gain sexual favor. I'm just saying, if you want to bitch about the commodification of sex, be prepared to be pissed at the whole animal kingdom.

I don't think anyone would consider it personally offensive if a dog or cat pooped on the floor of their house, but we tend to hold people to a slightly higher standard than this, no? The commodification of sex in the animal kingdom isn't especially offensive because it is what it is. A strictly natural, Darwinian environment with no rules, no hypocrisy, and no pretence whatsoever that developed because they exist in a ruthless state of conflict with their environment and other species in which (even if they had the capacity to process them) abstractions like ethics and decency would - in their most developed forms - often be counter-intuitive. Where competing over females essentially boils down to competing over baby-makers because there is no divorcing the act of sex from the act of procreation. Humans can and do completely, and enthusiastically divorce the act of sex from the process of procreation. As well as ruthlessly raping the biosphere and subjugating our environment, including many of our fellow species (none of whom we exist in competition with, and none of whom save bacteria represent the slightest threat to those of us in developed countries) to ensure that a small minority of us don't have to live like that. That we do it anyway even when we don't have to, even when the world, our fellow species and even most other humans suffer miserably for a privilege we utterly squander is what makes the difference.

 

[not_a_robot]

Uh, me getting paid for sex because I deserve to be is also a strictly natural behavior in a Darwinian environment with no rules, no hypocrisy, and no pretence whatsoever that developed because I exist exist in a ruthless state of conflict with my environment and other species in which (even though I have the capacity to process them) abstractions like ethics and decency would - in their most developed forms - often be counter-intuitive.
Men have been competing over my babymaker since before I hit puberty and they made my life miserable, without my consent nor active participation. To learn to capitalize on this in order to better navigate and endure it was a natural Darwinian adaptation. If you think humans are genuinely capable of behaving any better than animals, you need to observe them more objectively; they're not, they just pretend they are.
The humans who genuinely reject participation in animal behavior generally refuse to participate in human society at all, often going so far as to remove themselves from it altogether because it is so painful to them.
RIP @kuddelmuddel23.
Shit, some people are a mistake to talk to because it makes their absence so much more painful when they go.

 

[After The End]

Uh, me getting paid for sex because I deserve to be is also a strictly natural behavior in a Darwinian environment with no rules, no hypocrisy, and no pretence whatsoever that developed because I exist exist in a ruthless state of conflict with my environment and other species in which (even though I have the capacity to process them) abstractions like ethics and decency would - in their most developed forms - often be counter-intuitive.

In a strictly Darwinian environment with no rules the concept of deserving anything is meaningless. You will get only what you can physically take and hold. I've spoken to women who live in situations that are approaching something like this. I'm not suggesting you don't, because I don't know you, but I did say the luxury to care about ethics and decency are rare privileges in this world, and I have no idea if they apply to you. In the case of those they didn't the only reason they were able to do the work they did was because they had the support of agencies (who expected to be compensated) that supplied them with security otherwise they'd almost never actually get paid (and much else horrible would occur) though in every case said bouncers expected to be compensated with sex on demand and would usually cohabit with the girl they were assigned to look after so she could be available on a more or less constant basis. If not they'd simply, 'not be able to hear,' if she had cause to cry for help. As long as she wasn't injured so badly it stopped her working the agency itself wouldn't care, but then again if she was getting robbed too often to make them any money they'd fire her without a second thought.

I have great sympathy for these people. Even those who have effectively become ruthlessly exploitative psychopaths themselves. But even they did not live in countries with absolutely no rules, where people weren't socialised to behave to any sort of standard. Even if that standard was awful or exploitative, it could still be manipulated for their benefit; for example one of these women was frequently able to extort large sums out of married men who had sex with her. Likewise there was nothing inherently ruthless or dangerous about their environment beyond the other people in it. It's not like they were being eaten by wolves in the winter, or dying at thirty when their teeth started to rot and cause incurable infections.

And they could only do the work they did period because they had access to the medical technology to divorce the act of sex from the act of procreation. There was nothing Darwinian about the motives of their clients.

Men have been competing over my babymaker since before I hit puberty

I'm genuinely sorry to hear this, but forgetting the generalisation how can you not see the contradiction in terms here? Does this not support the view that, 'Humans can and do completely, and enthusiastically divorce the act of sex from the process of procreation.' I mean competing for pre-pubescant women makes anti-sense from a Darwinian perspective since they're incapable of having children and attempting to make them do so is physiologically destructive in the extreme, even ignoring the psychological cost which I'm sure is horrific. The places where this is considered normal behaviour (save for a minority of amoral opportunists who recognise that young people are easier to exploit and control) tend to, in every possible sense of the word, be primitive shit-holes. Many would have ceased to exist a long time ago were it not for international aid. By which I mean
even the most ruthlessly pragmatic society should realise this is not something to be condoned. Forget ethics.

and they made my life miserable, without my consent nor active participation.

I'm just putting this out there, but I don't recall ever doing anything to make your life miserable. As far as I know we've never even met. I am, however, curious why you bring up consent in this context. Personally I think it is very important, but it's also no more or less a social construct than ethics or morality. In fact I'd argue it cannot exist without the latter, and if you have no time for such abstractions, if you think people aren't even capable of them, then why should the concept of consent be any different? And if you really think people are genuinely incapable of behaving any better than animals I don't know why it would surprise or bother you that they behave the same way. I've never seen an animal ask for anything even vaguely resembling consent save in positions where it was a physiological necessity, either with respect to passing on one's genes or raising viable off-spring; a moot point for most humans in even reasonably developed countries, especially in cases where sex is divorced from the act of procreation. I don't condone any of this myself. But then I do think people have the capacity to be better than animals (and also far worse)

If you think humans are genuinely capable of behaving any better than animals, you need to observe them more objectively

What makes you think I haven't? Why assume that because my conclusion isn't the same as yours I must be ignorant about the subject? I can show you plenty of examples of people behaving in extremely ethical and altruistic ways; doing the exact opposite of what makes pragmatic, Darrwinian sense. Or at the very least showing empathy in spite of intense cultural and material pressure to do the opposite. For example it used to be very common for soldiers to deliberately shoot to miss, even in kill-or-be-killed firefights because most of them couldn't stomach taking human life. It takes a long time and phenomenal amounts of money and effort using programs carefully designed by psychologists to train people to be desensitised enough not to do this, and even then it doing so usually leaves them psychologically scarred in profound ways. Hell one of the main reasons why the process of killing in the holocaust was industrialised, and thus depersonalised was because even people who were ruthlessly indoctrinated to view their victims as subhuman couldn't physically spend all day machine gunning them in trenches without experiencing frequent breakdown. Likewise most people can't bring themselves to ruthlessly deploy violence even in self-defence, and even setting these extreme examples aside there are plenty of examples of people behaving with considerable amounts of self-sacrifice and altruism, of the sort that is more or less unheard of in the animal kingdom.

For my part though if I felt it was counter-intuitive for me to have any sort of morality and ethics I wouldn't complain about other people doing the same.

Sure there are people who do the opposite in terms of behaving ethically. In many cases their motivation is more cultural than Darwinian. Save to the extent that our genetic impulse towards altruism and cooperativeness is not something we generally do for its own sake, but for the social benefits it accrues us. Meaning if monstrous behaviour is culturally rewarded or tolerated it absolutely will flourish. Raping child brides and throwing homosexuals off buildings for example makes zero Darwinian sense. These behaviours exist because they're culturally normalised and are viewed as ethical through the lens of the culture in which they occur. So yes, many people can and will do horrific things that put even the most ruthless animals to shame, especially within the protection of a mob, or at the very least turn a blind eye to them (I can think of a few gut-wrenching examples off the top of my head like the Junko Furuta and Slvia Lykens cases, the lynching of Jesse Washington, or Year Zero, The Rape of Nanking - hell just about everything the IJA did in China and South East Asia - and so many more I'd honestly rather not think about them too much) but in almost every case there are cultural incentives for such behaviour. There is nothing strictly Darwinian about it. It doesn't exist in the natural world, as cruel as that can be, in fact the closest you get is among animals with cognitive capabilities that are close to ours like Dolphins and Chimpanzees.

they're not, they just pretend they are.

I'm not sure this is true.

The humans who genuinely reject participation in animal behaviour...

Again, the issue isn't animal behaviour. Animals don't do the things we do. Nor do most exist in a state where the widespread adoption of ethics and morality could make their lives better. This is also true of many humans. Which is why it's so depressing to see so many who do have this rare privilege squander it.

 

[Mbound]

Sex is painful for me, physically. One of the many reasons I want to ctb. Every normal thing hurts my body.

 

[After The End]

Sex is painful for me, physically. One of the many reasons I want to ctb. Every normal thing hurts my body.

I'm really sorry to hear that. Chronic pain can be one of the cruellest things there is. Especially when it stops you doing things most people take for granted.

 

[Shamana]

I've been chemically castrated every since I was on SSRI's and psyc drugs as a 20 year old. Now 32 so it's roughly 13 years since I had sex and had a sex life despite looking like super model when I'm in good shape and attract a lot women when I'm on my game. Aren't psyc meds just wonderfull`?

 

[Mbound]

I've been chemically castrated every since I was on SSRI's and psyc drugs as a 20 year old. Now 32 so it's roughly 13 years since I had sex and had a sex life despite looking like super model when I'm in good shape and attract a lot women when I'm on my game. Aren't psyc meds just wonderfull`?

It always made me laugh when guys would hit on me at work. "You're so beautiful what's your number" lmao if only you knew dude, I'm fucking useless for your purposes.

 

[Shamana]

It always made me laugh when guys would hit on me at work. "You're so beautiful what's your number" lmao if only you knew dude, I'm fucking useless for your purposes.

Do you also have PSSD? Persistent sexual side effects from SSRI's?

 

[Mbound]

Do you also have PSSD? Persistent sexual side effects from SSRI's?

No I have multiple pelvic pain conditions that make sex painful

 

[After The End]

I've been chemically castrated every since I was on SSRI's...

It always made me laugh when guys would hit on me at work. "You're so beautiful what's your number" lmao if only you knew dude, I'm fucking useless for your purposes.

Do you still have any craving for companionship and closeness? There are people are open to relationships that involve intimacy and companionship. The absence of sex is not necessarily a deal-breaker. Though I imagine some would want to get it elsewhere. Others aren't all that fussed. It's not hard to take care of your sexual impulses yourself, but having companionship and intimacy without someone else in the picture really isn't an option.

 

[Shamana]

No I have multiple pelvic pain conditions that make sex painful

Ouch. Sorry to hear that. If I had never been castrated, I would never have been 100% serious about suicide since my great passion in life before SSRI's was womanizing.

Do you still have any craving for companionship and closeness? There are people are open to relationships that involve intimacy and companionship. The absence of sex is not necessarily a deal-breaker. Though I imagine some would want to get it elsewhere. Others aren't all that fussed. It's not hard to take care of your sexual impulses yourself, but having companionship and intimacy without someone else in the picture really isn't an option.

I crave closeness as well, but I also feel lobotomized. My ability to feel connection is a lot less and I was never autistic, but I feel that way now. Generally I refuse to enter a relationship without being able to have sex because it puts me at a major disadvantage and I don't want to enter a relationship on a unequal footing. Apart from that I'm so seriously ill with depression and other stuff I don't have energy for relationships more anyway.

 

[Mbound]

Ouch. Sorry to hear that. If I had never been castrated, I would never have been 100% serious about suicide since my great passion in life before SSRI's was womanizing.

I'm sorry to hear for you too. It makes you feel very set apart from others, or at least me. If my body worked normally I'd never be on this site either.

Do you still have any craving for companionship and closeness? There are people are open to relationships that involve intimacy and companionship. The absence of sex is not necessarily a deal-breaker. Though I imagine some would want to get it elsewhere. Others aren't all that fussed. It's not hard to take care of your sexual impulses yourself, but having companionship and intimacy without someone else in the picture really isn't an option.

I have a long term relationship, and he's very understanding but I feel terrible I'm stopping him from having a normal sex life. I am happy that when I'm gone he will be free to pursue that.

 

[Shamana]

I'm sorry to hear for you too. It makes you feel very set apart from others, or at least me. If my body worked normally I'd never be on this site either.



I have a long term relationship, and he's very understanding but I feel terrible I'm stopping him from having a normal sex life. I am happy that when I'm gone he will be free to pursue that.

Yeah, I feel really disconnected and it's so horrible. My great wish in life was always to have a rich romantic life. It's when I'm with girls I feel most at home and alive in life. I've been seperated from all that in over a decade now. Not being touched or cuddled for over a decade makes you kind of weird.

 

[Mbound]

Yeah, I feel really disconnected and it's so horrible. My great wish in life was always to have a rich romantic life. It's when I'm with girls I feel most at home and alive in life. I've been seperated from all that in over a decade now. Not being touched or cuddled for over a decade makes you kind of weird.

You should date a girl with endometriosis or another pelvic pain condition that makes sex painful. No joke, it's not that uncommon. Everyone deserves love and intimacy even if sex isn't always possible.

 

[Sailfisher]

It became of no desire when the severe wave of depression came about. When it still happens, the high is much more temporary.

 

[After The End]

I crave closeness as well, but I also feel lobotomized. My ability to feel connection is a lot less and I was never autistic, but I feel that way now. Generally I refuse to enter a relationship without being able to have sex because it puts me at a major disadvantage and I don't want to enter a relationship on a unequal footing. Apart from that I'm so seriously ill with depression and other stuff I don't have energy for relationships more anyway.

I don't understand what you mean by it putting you at a disadvantage.

have a long term relationship, and he's very understanding but I feel terrible I'm stopping him from having a normal sex life. I am happy that when I'm gone he will be free to pursue that.

Do pelvic problems really prevent you from having any sort of physical sex life? Maybe he's fine with the situation, or have have you discussed an open relationship if that's not the case. Obviously not for everyone.

Not being touched or cuddled for over a decade makes you kind of weird.

I can sympathise. Though this is something I've never experienced.

You should date a girl with endometriosis or another pelvic pain condition that makes sex painful. No joke, it's not that uncommon. Everyone deserves love and intimacy even if sex isn't always possible.

Most people totally reject the 'everyone deserves love and intimacy,' principle these days, at least for men. 'You're not entitled to anything.' is a far more popular sentiment (even if nothing about your attitude suggests entitlement, just daring to say you're lonely is enough for some people) but if this condition is uncommon then I've probably been rejected by many people with it. No way I could put a number on the total but it's many many thousands, and almost every time rejection occurs prior to any sort of interaction.

 

[TheDevilsAngel]

I used enjoy it alot
Now i feel i hate it and its disgusting and causes nothing but grief for me.
I feel unclean and dirty i dont know why because ive been with only one man the last twelve years now his gone for good i hate it.