Venting Do you ever wish to be raped again because you deserve it?

[Marz]

Again and again. The wish to be hurt grows stronger.

 

[Sweet emotion]

That's really sick. First of all no one deserves to be raped. Even if they're the biggest whore on the planet. I have no idea why you would ask such a question.

 

[DepressionsAHo]

Well, never been raped but I've been abused heavily and no. I'm truly sorry that you wish such a thing to happen again. I can only offer my sincerest of apologies

 

[Meretlein]

You don't deserve that.

 

[Lethe]

Sounds masochistic.

 

[LonelyLight]

No!!!! And if you feel that you do deserve it I can promise that you don't!!

 

[puppy9]

Again and again. The wish to be hurt grows stronger.

I'll never understand your feeling. Why this need to happen to you? I'm afraid of this world now, it's so cruel that it makes a victim feels they deserve that.

 

[CuriousAboutThis]

Again and again. The wish to be hurt grows stronger.

I would say no.

 

[wildmoon]

That's really sick. First of all no one deserves to be raped. Even if they're the biggest whore on the planet. I have no idea why you would ask such a question.

I think you misread what the OP was saying. The OP has been raped and talking about inflicting pain on herself because she is suffering with what has happened to her. She wasn't wishing rape on anyone but asking if somebody feels the way she feels - correct me if I am wrong, Marz.

What she is saying is common with rape victims. My friend is a rape counsellor and a survivor of rape herself; I have had many conversations with her and she explained to me that it is common for victims to go through what they call repetition compulsion, which is a compulsion to repeat the trauma. They can even watch movies with rape scenes in them, over and over, even though it is extremely torturous for them. It is not sick and however odd it seems to others, it is actually very common and is part of dealing with what they have been through, or replaying what they went through in order to get a different result. It's even normal for them to blame themselves at some point and think they deserved it or think they are dirty, even though the logical part of them knows this is not true.

Marz, I am sorry you are going through this. Have you has any counselling?

 

[Boonks]

That's really sick. First of all no one deserves to be raped. Even if they're the biggest whore on the planet. I have no idea why you would ask such a question.

Because it's real. OP, yes. And so much more.

 

[Marz]

I think you misread what the OP was saying. The OP has been raped and talking about inflicting pain on herself because she is suffering with what has happened to her. She wasn't wishing rape on anyone but asking if somebody feels the way she feels - correct me if I am wrong, Marz.

What she is saying is common with rape victims. My friend is a rape counsellor and a survivor of rape herself; I have had many conversations with her and she explained to me that it is common for victims to go through what they call repetition compulsion, which is a compulsion to repeat the trauma. They can even watch movies with rape scenes in them, over and over, even though it is extremely torturous for them. It is not sick and however odd it seems to others, it is actually very common and is part of dealing with what they have been through, or replaying what they went through in order to get a different result. It's even normal for them to blame themselves at some point and think they deserved it or think they are dirty, even though the logical part of them knows this is not true.

Marz, I am sorry you are going through this. Have you has any counselling?

All of this is on point.

I haven't had counselling nor can access it, sadly..

 

[wildmoon]

All of this is on point.

I haven't had counselling nor can access it, sadly..

I feel you. It's just sad that so many are walking around with unhealed trauma and cannot access help.
At least there are places like this we can come to vent and support eachother.

 

[clownangel]

On one hand I don't *want* to relive any of it (though trauma is a son of a bitch and I end up very vividly doing so sometimes) but on the other there's definitely the ingrained "I deserve(d) this/that" bit as well that I'd...love to just delete permanently.

Sucks. Echoing @wildmoon for sure - I'm sad that this is a relatable thing for so many though it makes me feel less alone to see other people talking about the same feelings that I have.

 

[Sweet emotion]

All of this is on point.

I haven't had counselling nor can access it, sadly..

I'm so sorry you feel this way and that you haven't had access to help. I'm sorry for what happened to you. You didn't deserve it in any way shape or form. I really hope one day you will find peace and if you choose not to CTB, I hope the rest of your life is filled with happiness.

On one hand I don't *want* to relive any of it (though trauma is a son of a bitch and I end up very vividly doing so sometimes) but on the other there's definitely the ingrained "I deserve(d) this/that" bit as well that I'd...love to just delete permanently.

Sucks. Echoing @wildmoon for sure - I'm sad that this is a relatable thing for so many though it makes me feel less alone to see other people talking about the same feelings that I have.

Please know you didn't deserve it. Tell yourself this every day. Not even a prostitute deserves to be raped. If you didn't want to havE sex with a man or were to intoxicated or whatever....you didn't deserve it..did you know that even if your husband has sex with his wife while she's sleeping it's considered rape? You didn't deserve it sweetie. I wish you all the best.

 

[NitriteAnatomy]

Shit like this makes me regret being born with a dongle between my legs. Majority of us men are sick fuckers and while I'm, personally, not like them......just ugh.

 

[Final Escape]

Shit like this makes me regret being born with a dongle between my legs. Majority of us men are sick fuckers and while I'm, personally, not like them......just ugh.

What a terrible thing to say about men, and no the majority of men at least in more civilized countries are the least rapey. Yea there's always goin to be some opportunistic men and like this is why blended families can be kind of dangerous for young male or female children because some people can be man or woman, more likely to sexually take advantage of an unrelated child. Because rape exists you just have to be aware of where u are hanging out, pay attention to your drug and alcohol use which increases risk of being raped. Don't hang out a frat parties late and when ure drunk and don't be alone with a guy u don't know very well. Just use common sense. I'm not sure why u would want to be raped again in real life, although I've had like sexy rape fantasies but I wouldn't want to be raped by some guy I do not want to be intimate with lol! Yikes!

 

[NitriteAnatomy]

What a terrible thing to say about men, and no the majority of men at least in more civilized countries are the least rapey. Yea there's always goin to be some opportunistic men and like this is why blended families can be kind of dangerous for young male or female children because some people can be man or woman, more likely to sexually take advantage of an unrelated child. Because rape exists you just have to be aware of where u are hanging out, pay attention to your drug and alcohol use which increases risk of being raped. Don't hang out a frat parties late and when ure drunk and don't be alone with a guy u don't know very well. Just use common sense. I'm not sure why u would want to be raped again in real life, although I've had like sexy rape fantasies but I wouldn't want to be raped by some guy I do not want to be intimate with lol! Yikes!

As a man, I have every right to say it. And in the US, this tends to be an issue, plus I never said I was raped, so not sure where you got that from, unless that was meant for the OP. I truly do regret being male, at times, since shit like that happens and then us decent ones are automatically lumped in with rapists and pricks. I'm a 34yr old and can pretty much drink if I feel like it, as well. I'm also highly antisocial, so frat bullshit is right out.

 

[Manja]

Yes, what Wildmoon said...
Also I lost all selfrespect, letting people do to me whatever they want and hurt me thinking maybe then they will love me...it just leaves you feeling even worse about yourself and with more trauma to drag with you...

 

[Final Escape]

As a man, I have every right to say it. And in the US, this tends to be an issue, plus I never said I was raped, so not sure where you got that from, unless that was meant for the OP. I truly do regret being male, at times, since shit like that happens and then us decent ones are automatically lumped in with rapists and pricks. I'm a 34yr old and can pretty much drink if I feel like it, as well. I'm also highly antisocial, so frat bullshit is right out.

Sorry if I misunderstood anything, I never thought u were raped but what I took from your comment is that u assume most men are rapey and sick fucks when I just don't think that's the case. Men are very demonized and especially white men in the US. I was combining my response to the subject of the thread and to u sorry lol!

 

[NitriteAnatomy]

Sorry if I misunderstood anything, I never thought u were raped but what I took from your comment is that u assume most men are rapey and sick fucks when I just don't think that's the case. Men are very demonized and especially white men in the US. I was combining my response to the subject of the thread and to u sorry lol!

Because most of the time, it's men that perform the act. It's also not limited to white men, though if you see the news in regards to the celebs and politicians that are getting busted in regards to paedophilia, they do all share that particular trait.

Women can be 'rapey' as well, but those cases aren't reported nearly as much as it is in regards to men. I'm not out to damn my own gender, but I'm also not stupid to think that there aren't a good many men that take advantage of women, either. I grew up in areas where the physical and/or sexual abuse of woman happened often and I would often be lumped into the same category, just for being male. So, yes, it does make me sick that there are men period that are capable of such things, no matter what corner of the globe they reside in.

I agree with men being demonized in many forms, too, just look at the Lifetime Channel alone for that one, lol. But, the fact remains that this is a problem and cases like the OP's aren't as unusual as people think. Most times, the victims are terrified to step forward or feel the same as what OP put forth. No one should ever feel that they deserve such things to be forced upon them.

And no problem, I apologize for my hasty 'asshole mode' response on that, I was rather confused why you'd state a lot of what you did when all I said is that men like the one/ones that caused OP to feel as they do, make me regret being male.

 

[Final Escape]

I remember my mother watching the lifetime channel showing non stop domestic violence movies lol! It sadly shaped my views of men because I had been sexually abused by one of her partners at age 10 for awhile and later those shows were often on. I grew up with no father so I was at high risk of sexual abuse by an unrelated male in the single mother home lol! I laugh because it's so fucked up how the state policies actually set children up to raise the risk of sexual abuse on them. You are 30 or 40 times more likely to be sexually abused as a child in a single mother home. Yet our gov promotes this shit by incentivizing women to have kids outside of marriage. When women had to wait till marriage it significantly reduces risk of abuse on kids if the bio father is under same roof.

 

[Soulless_Angel]

Fuck no, No, No, fucking hell wow, Ill be honest and say I have lost count of the amount of times I have been raped, all i remember is pain, physically and mentally, Self harm is all I seek, no matter how, Rape no, never again, never, the pain, the torture is too much
, Whilst I understand the desperation to seek grounding and believe it's all you deserve, we are fucking better then that. We just need to seek this, and find something more

 

[MissNietzsche]

All I can say is that I'm so sorry you feel this way.

 

[Worthless_nobody]

No!! I never deserved it.....he was a piece of shit who ruined my life. Everyone says "get help" or it gets better but some of us do not get the option of help or counseling or anything.

 

[ForgiveMySins]

No!!! I never deserved it.....

So do u got raped ?

 

[Worthless_nobody]

So do u got raped ?

Yes....I edited the post

 

[ForgiveMySins]

Yes....I edited the post

Me too

 

[justwhy?]

I remember my mother watching the lifetime channel showing non stop domestic violence movies lol! It sadly shaped my views of men because I had been sexually abused by one of her partners at age 10 for awhile and later those shows were often on. I grew up with no father so I was at high risk of sexual abuse by an unrelated male in the single mother home lol! I laugh because it's so fucked up how the state policies actually set children up to raise the risk of sexual abuse on them. You are 30 or 40 times more likely to be sexually abused as a child in a single mother home. Yet our gov promotes this shit by incentivizing women to have kids outside of marriage. When women had to wait till marriage it significantly reduces risk of abuse on kids if the bio father is under same roof.

Not just abuse (sexual or otherwise) by those from outside the family - intact families have lower rates of inter sibling and parent on child and even child on parent abuse. Yup the incentives in our societies are broken. Careful though - pointing it out makes you evil, from what I can gather.

 

[Final Escape]

Not just abuse (sexual or otherwise) by those from outside the family - intact families have lower rates of inter sibling and parent on child and even child on parent abuse. Yup the incentives in our societies are broken. Careful though - pointing it out makes you evil, from what I can gather.

Right lol! All women have to do and unfortunately many of us can't do this without proper guidance and being brought up correctly is to choose a decent man and then sorry but no divorce unless in rare circumstances where the guy turned out to be a psychopath/antisocial or the woman is which makes them violent and dangerous as a marriage partner. I'm not knocking women because I would have needed help to marry correctly it wasn't like something that we just instinctively know how to do. Just like men don't always know about choosing a decent woman. But since it's women who get pregnant and are responsible for choosing a good reliable man to avoid replacing the father w welfare state, it is more on a woman to choose a man that will be reliable and responsible father and marriage material. At least wait to divorce till the kids have left the home which normally used to happen.

 

[freefrommybody]

In reality, you never deserved to be raped, though I can understand a desire to be hurt. I haven't wished to be raped, beyond fantasy. However, when I'm anxious and feel like a piece of garbage, I would honestly pay someone to beat the crap out of me.