Do you ever feel assured you want to die?

[Fardarmist]

Yeah when I was a teenager I felt that way before. But it was over things I should not have felt so strongly about. Right now I feel dead set on finding the quickest and most painless way to die possible. It's all I ever think about while continuing to go to work everyday. Smiling, trying to be the professional day to day. To me I look at it as my life is complete. I don't want to see what happens with it anymore. I'm not happy with the way my life ended up. To me my life was a failed experience. I lost something I really shouldn't have and I don't think I can live without or that I cant accept living without it. In its wake all I feel is how I failed day after day.

 

[SomewhereAlongThe]

I have to be absolutely sure about my decision, so in a way yeah, I feel assured now at this point. I also have feelings that this life turned out to be a failed experience, because I have found nothing fulfilling in my life. It feels like my genetic makeup is a failure, with nothing to offer me to use in life. I don't know those feelings of loss you mentioned, but I definitely understand feeling like life is a loss. That's what it feels like having a life you have nothing to show for.

 

[-nobodyknows-]

I don't want to die; I would rather live if I could. But… I can't. It's just becoming too much to handle. I don't have a reason to live.

 

[brokeandbroken]

I don't want to die; I would rather live if I could. But… I can't. It's just becoming too much to handle. I don't have a reason to live.

Essentially this for me. My life is completely devoid of good things. Every single good, decent, or okay thing has been stripped away from me. What's to live for in the absence of anything good or decent.

 

[Forever Sleep]

Yes, I think so. It's not exactly that I failed. For now at least, I actually have what I always wanted and thought would be enough to sustain me. But, it isn't now. It brings with it it's own complications. I'm effectively just tired of life I think. Not even a holiday would fix it because- that has to end at some point. I'm just sick of trying I suppose when I don't even want to anymore. It all just feels like one long slog that I got conscripted to because my parents thought it would be nice to have children.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

All the time. My mind flip flops back and forth between wanting to die and wanting to live almost twelve times every day.

 

[ravenx]

I feel you all here. I'm feeling this way and it sucks to be that person. Because, I genuinely tried and thought everything would get better, but it didn't, and now i feel worse.

But i accepted my faith; life is not for me, and it's over.

 

[ijustwishtodie]

I've always wanted to be dead. I hate life and find life to be absolutely repulsive. The concept of recovery doesn't apply to me since my issues are with life itself and people don't attribute death as a way of recovery. For me, death is recovery from the pain and horrors that is life

 

[FuneralCry]

In my case I'm always and only wishing to not exist, I'm always wishing for death to finally bring me peace from the cruelty and suffering of existence, personally I'd never wish to exist at all. To me existence will always be a horrific, tragic mistake that just causes so much torment, personally I only see non-existence as desirable, I've suffered so much for so long, I truly wish I could erase my existence so it's like I never suffered, all I wish for is to never exist again.

 

[Davey40210]

Every day.