A

affirmatice

Student
Aug 31, 2024
148
All my life, I've struggled to find myself.

Dealt with severe social anxiety, never had normal self-esteem. Add in chronic health problems that are ruining me, and it just seems like I'll never truly be in control of my own life.

I had a terrible anxious breakdown the other day, because I realized I literally don't know who I am. I know the person I've crafted, to fit in, to impress, to manipulate in a sense. But I don't know who I really am, I don't know what it's like to actually live my own life.

Regardless, I've felt enough of all this. Death itself doesn't scare me, as for a long time now, sleep is the most peaceful time of my day. The only thing that sucks is the transition period. Also knowing that I will be hurting others and saying goodbye to my dreams. I think my biggest dream of all is something I was never able to accomplish - to live my own genuine life and live it freely.
 
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