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SardonicSatire

Member
Apr 16, 2019
19
Hey all, I'm new here so I'm glad I finally have a place to tell my story. 2 years ago right now you probably couldn't find a happier person in me. My grades were skyrocketing, I had the best group of friends, and I met what was supposed to be the love of my life. I left high school the happiest man I've ever been. Me and my girlfriend were relationship goals, everyone that fucked me over in the past envied me, I had an amazing job, and I travelled all over the city with her. None of it was to last. I was backstabbed by my own friend group, and her. This fucking snake talked behind my back and told her I wasn't good enough and that she deserved better. For two months he did this and in those two months I was neglected, abused, and forgotten. During the last weekend of summer my friend invited 4 guys to his cottage and this snake was one of them. On the last night I discovered she talked to him over the phone at 3am. She said it was over nothing related but my friend who overheard said otherwise. The last week of summer was spent with me crying in my work bathroom and her possibly cheating. The day before she left I decided to give her one more chance but she came to my house, broke up, and reminded me that she was going to reverse the abuser to her friends and family. While I tried to get over it, being constantly reminded of her, and witnessing pictures of her kissing and fucking other guys (some from my own friend group) pushed me over the edge. I was hours away from ending it all until I decided that the new year would be different. So I gave it a chance, and for awhile it worked, I had a new amazing friend group, and I met someone. Someone who I thought was "the one". The first month and a half of this year was like experiencing all those happy moments at once all over again. She told me I was gorgeous and the one she's been looking for her whole life. A week later she cancelled our date and told me to let her be. Her attitude towards me shifted every week after that, even when I was there for her. My new friends soon backstabbed me by talking shit about me to everyone, including her. Two days ago I planned to ask her out like we were supposed to months ago. She gave me the biggest hug when I saw her, and to start conversation I mentioned some drama between me and a friend she didn't like. She snapped, yelled at me in front of everyone and told me to grow a pair. Because I waited all day to do this I waited until her next class was over. I waited 5 hours for her, when I found her and poured my fucking heart out to her she simply told me we were just friends and that im not good enough. It was like experiencing my ex all over again. I currently have no friends, a family that hates me, a piss poor education, an extremely tedious daily routine, and the knowledge I let the girl of my dreams go twice. I gave life a chance and life once again fucked me over. I truly don't see a future for me as I'm 20 years old and already a miserable old man like my dad. I could go on and on but I don't want to bore anyone. I'm going to ctb either tonight or tomorrow, I bought a rope a while ago and I have a spot to do it. I just want to wake up from this fucking nightmare, I want to wake up in my girlfriends arms so she can remind me how beautiful life is again.
 
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An hero of our time

An hero of our time

Не для меня
Apr 17, 2019
34
I amazed how close it to my own story. Very relatable, as they say.
Don't want to spoil your determination, godspeed to you.

I want to wake up in my girlfriends arms so she can remind me how beautiful life is again.
Literally my thoughts. If your will strong enough you'll make it through death and time, that's what i believe.
 
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SardonicSatire

Member
Apr 16, 2019
19
I amazed how close it to my own story. Very relatable, as they say.
Don't want to spoil your determination, godspeed to you.


Literally my thoughts. If your will strong enough you'll make it through death and time, that's what i believe.
Thank you my friend. Honestly while it's naive as fuck to believe in such things, I truly hope the afterlife is just an infinite time loop of those first 8 months me and my ex were together. If not then I'm happy just being at peace.
 
An hero of our time

An hero of our time

Не для меня
Apr 17, 2019
34
Honestly while it's naive as fuck to believe in such things
Sure it is, like any other belief. But who can prove it wrong?
I lasted only one month though. And it all was my fault, not someone's betrayal. I can't make sense out of this to this day, it all fell apart so easy and reasons were so dumb.
Well, naive beliefs are suitable for dumb world i guess.
 
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SardonicSatire

Member
Apr 16, 2019
19
Sure it is, like any other belief. But who can prove it wrong?
I lasted only one month though. And it all was my fault, not someone's betrayal. I can't make sense out of this to this day, it all fell apart so easy and reasons were so dumb.
Well, naive beliefs are suitable for dumb world i guess.
I couldn't agree more
 
watamote

watamote

New Member
Apr 13, 2019
1
if it makes your feel any better, all of my friends stopped talking to me, I was bullied for most of my life in every social context I entered, but I found the love of my life and our relationship is perfect. we plan to get married, but this small piece of of perfection is just a drop in oil spill. the rest of my life/life in general for people and animals is miserable and no single person has the power to prove it's otherwise. humankind is designed to die out eventually, we're just ahead of the curve in realizing that.
 
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SardonicSatire

Member
Apr 16, 2019
19
if it makes your feel any better, all of my friends stopped talking to me, I was bullied for most of my life in every social context I entered, but I found the love of my life and our relationship is perfect. we plan to get married, but this small piece of of perfection is just a drop in oil spill. the rest of my life/life in general for people and animals is miserable and no single person has the power to prove it's otherwise. humankind is designed to die out eventually, we're just ahead of the curve in realizing that.
You have my envy. My one wish in life is to find "the one", but I doubt I will ever at this point. We have similar stories, my friendships are failing, my relationship with my family is strained, and everyone that fucked me over, and put me in the state I am in today are living my dreams. Every day I'm reminded how they succeeded, some because of my support, and how they will live a life I was never destined to have. While I don't know you personally, and have no say in how you should live your life, if you truly love this person they should be your number one priority, and if she is truly the love of your life I implore you to appreciate every second of time you share together. Through the good and the bad. While the road to getting there was brutal you should never look back because those people really are not worth a single thought. :)
 
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spanishguy22

Enlightened
Apr 9, 2019
1,003
if it makes your feel any better, all of my friends stopped talking to me, I was bullied for most of my life in every social context I entered, but I found the love of my life and our relationship is perfect. we plan to get married, but this small piece of of perfection is just a drop in oil spill. the rest of my life/life in general for people and animals is miserable and no single person has the power to prove it's otherwise. humankind is designed to die out eventually, we're just ahead of the curve in realizing that.
Sadly 7 billion people disagree
 
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bugfriendly

bugfriendly

Member
Apr 14, 2019
42
Makes us smarter than 7 billion people if anything.

love this. so happy I found this place. I'm surrounded by hypersensitive, small minded, overly fucking positive dumbasses on the daily !!! ugh
 
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