Ctb by train- selfish?

[RedFruit]

So suicide is selfish in general, sure. What about suicide by train? I take the train a decent amount (Amtrak) and I don't know if any other trains in my area. There's a lot of railroads but I've never seen trains go on them nor do I know a schedule. So I say all of this to say, is it too selfish to jump infront of the train? There will most definitely be at least 20 people around and many more inside the train. I really don't want to traumatize people. It seems like almost any method I pick I will die around others. I'd really like to OD in a hotel room but I have no idea how. I feel like I'm lacking options somehow.

 

[Aflame5926]

its always traumatising. only think i would say jumping and in front of the train is imo is the crown in methods for traumatizing people.
because there is always other people around unfortunely.

have you checked out the forum tho?

 

[mjolnir]

This adds to the equation someone who didn't ask to be involved in this situation. The train driver didn't leave home with the intention of running over anyone.

 

[RedFruit]

its always traumatising. only think i would say jumping and in front of the train is imo is the crown in methods for traumatizing people.
because there is always other people around unfortunely.

have you checked out the forum tho?

Have I checked out the forum? Like, of methods?

 

[Aflame5926]

Have I checked out the forum? Like, of methods?

yes

 

[Johnporkyy1000]

I wouldn't say selfish but I would say that people and the train driver would definitely be traumatised and would have the image of you jumping stay w them for life

 

[hybridize]

As you say it's always selfish in some way. I was in a psyche ward some time ago with a train driver who experienced that. It ruined him, I think he may have even ended his life after he left because of the trauma it caused.

Someone will always be traumatized by death but for me a train is a no go. That's a step too far even for the deeply desperate suicidal Imo.

 

[RedFruit]

yes

I always seem to lose it and can't find it. How do you get to it?

 

[Aflame5926]

I always seem to lose it and can't find it. How do you get to it?

bro it stickied above in the forum. how can you miss this xD

 

[Forever Sleep]

To an extent, I think our societies- that deny our access to reliable, relatively peaceful methods have blood on their hands. You can't corner a desperate creature and not expect it to do something rash to escape.

That said- we do likely mostly have the capacity to contemplate our actions. I would hope that I would consider almost any other method asides from either train or death by cop (shooting) seeing as it creates a unwilling accomplice- that will very likely suffer as a result. Plus- there's not much control over who else will witness it too and- how it will affect them.

I've seen the argument sometimes that- this world is shit. People are shit and uncaring so- why do they deserve our consideration? By taking the same attitude but to the extreme though- we would just be adding to that.

Plus, I suppose it does lend into this idea that suicide is utterly selfish. Maybe in a small way- by trying to reduce the impact of a suicide- via our method, location, preparation- we can also prove that a suicide can be meticulously planned to create the least impact possible. How then- people would still describe it selfish, impulsive and thoughtless wouldn't make so much sense.

The other thing I've occassionally seen is people contemplating their suicide as an act of revenge on an uncaring society. Again though- how can they be sure the individuals who witness it are those types of people?

I suppose I'd prefer not to leave a disturbing mess for first responders to face too. So- that also tends to inform what methods I'm (hopefully) less willing to do.

 

[RedFruit]

bro it stickied above in the forum. how can you miss this xD

Bro I LITERALLY can't see it. I missed it because I'm a retard. Thanks for the help.

To an extent, I think our societies- that deny our access to reliable, relatively peaceful methods have blood on their hands. You can't corner a desperate creature and not expect it to do something rash to escape.

That said- we do likely mostly have the capacity to contemplate our actions. I would hope that I would consider almost any other method asides from either train or death by cop (shooting) seeing as it creates a unwilling accomplice- that will very likely suffer as a result. Plus- there's not much control over who else will witness it too and- how it will affect them.

I've seen the argument sometimes that- this world is shit. People are shit and uncaring so- why do they deserve our consideration? By taking the same attitude but to the extreme though- we would just be adding to that.

Plus, I suppose it does lend into this idea that suicide is utterly selfish. Maybe in a small way- by trying to reduce the impact of a suicide- via our method, location, preparation- we can also prove that a suicide can be meticulously planned to create the least impact possible. How then- people would still describe it selfish, impulsive and thoughtless wouldn't make so much sense.

The other thing I've occassionally seen is people contemplating their suicide as an act of revenge on an uncaring society. Again though- how can they be sure the individuals who witness it are those types of people?

I suppose I'd prefer not to leave a disturbing mess for first responders to face too. So- that also tends to inform what methods I'm (hopefully) less willing to do.

Eh. It's still selfish even if no one sees it. Only way it's not selfish is if you make it so theres no one who can grieve for you. I have a lot of friends and family who would miss me regardless.

 

[Captive_Mind515]

I've slightly changed my view on this over time. Yes, I do think it's somewhat selfish.

But then, so is preventing suffering people from having access to peaceful methods.

Really, a lot depends on how desperate a person is and whether they have any other viable methods. Which is a highly subjective thing as well, because some methods are harder to face for some people. (Like you may be able to use a train, but mentally incapable of jumping because one is much more terrifying etc)

On a selfishness scale, there are much worse acts than using a train. There are methods that could actually endanger other people's lives directly - like jumping off a bridge onto a busy highway or something…

It's not my endorsement of using trains. But I can understand why some people choose it, better than I did in the past.

 

[insectontrial]

I hate the rhetoric around suicide being a "selfish" thing to do, but I couldn't CTB in this way. I wouldn't want to traumatise a train driver, or any passengers or railway workers.

I guess one silver lining of me being autistic is that I'm very much your stereotypical "special interest in trains" autistic person and so I have a lot of respect and admiration for people who work in the field.

 

[RedFruit]

I hate the rhetoric around suicide being a "selfish" thing to do, but I couldn't CTB in this way. I wouldn't want to traumatise a train driver, or any passengers or railway workers.

I guess one silver lining of me being autistic is that I'm very much your stereotypical "special interest in trains" autistic person and so I have a lot of respect and admiration for people who work in the field.

I do enjoy trains myself and don't really want to hurt anyone else in my process. I just also don't know a sure way to ctb without being caught or a chance of me surviving.

 

[cheesedout]

It's a really gory thing to do in front of a crowd, not to mention the poor driver, but realistically every method is gonna traumatize someone -- someone's gotta find the body, after all. I wouldn't be in favor of you doing it at all, but if you're really desperate and have no other options, at least try to do it on a part of track in between stations, when there isn't a crowd watching. I'm sure there's some way to find a schedule, or at least infer one.