P
Pallf
I'm tired
- May 27, 2018
- 363
I was unstable for whatever reason yesterday and my mind decided to whir nonstop about ctb. I started thinking about ctb by cop and how I could try to carry this out.
The way I see it there are a few things that I'd need to happen, chiefly that I need body cams turned off so no one in my town would see my having a mental crisis in my final moments of life. I also don't want my parents to see it.
I'd also need to find a cop who wouldn't try to arrest me first. Now I wouldn't use a real or fake weapon, I'd just motion like I did have one.
Finally I'd love to be able to not fuck up a cop mentally from having to kill me. I know it's a high possibility, but still.
I wanted to post about this yesterday, but I wanted to write this with a clear mind so I waited till today.
I guess I just needed to let someone know about this because I certainly can't talk about it irl.
The way I see it there are a few things that I'd need to happen, chiefly that I need body cams turned off so no one in my town would see my having a mental crisis in my final moments of life. I also don't want my parents to see it.
I'd also need to find a cop who wouldn't try to arrest me first. Now I wouldn't use a real or fake weapon, I'd just motion like I did have one.
Finally I'd love to be able to not fuck up a cop mentally from having to kill me. I know it's a high possibility, but still.
I wanted to post about this yesterday, but I wanted to write this with a clear mind so I waited till today.
I guess I just needed to let someone know about this because I certainly can't talk about it irl.