Deleted member 13412
Member
- Dec 27, 2019
- 84
same ): i hv some philosophical reasons on why i want to die but chronic pain of my back n migrains makes me wanna die so much too, rly this meatcage i feel trapped in is so painful );
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Sinkinshyp
Paragon
- Sep 7, 2020
- 947
It was when they put me on the relpax at 8 months that worked. It's the only thing that works
If u have not tried toradol shots i would suggest it. The pill form does nothing but the shot works pretty well. They only trouble with it for me is to get it i have to got to the er. U may check with your dr tho u might be able to get it in office. My clinic doesnt do it and my insurance doesnt cover any drs that do near me.
Viceroy
Student
- Oct 20, 2020
- 101
Pookie
Somebody you used to know.
- Oct 18, 2020
- 1,051
I can relate. I have fibromyalgia and suffer from chronic pain and painkillers don't really help my pain. It's one of the reasons I want to ctb.
I feel your pain.
Same here.
Last edited:
Disappointered
Enlightened
- Sep 21, 2020
- 1,280
Same. I was fucked up emotionally and socially from an early age but now I've also got chronic pain. Just makes the exit plan more justifiable. When the pain can't be managed by pills anymore I'll have no choice but to ask for euthanasia or do it myself.
Lotus
Experienced
- Dec 17, 2019
- 235
I will check out both of them, but psilocybin is probably a little hard for me to get. Thanks for your suggestions.
Lots of hugs. It's so frustrating when painkillers don't work and everything feels so hopeless.
I'm sorry to hear. I understand the perspective that it makes ctb more justifiable, and I guess I'm kinda holding on to that right now. Hugs, and I hope that the pills will work for you for a long time.
Beforeigo
Member
- Mar 2, 2020
- 27
I'm so sorry that you're having a really shitty time health wise I can really relate, My poor health definitely is a large part of my reason of wanting to CTB, I dislocate my bones really easy, my stomach is partially paralysed and my heart is fucked up too, I'm always in pain and I just want to escape it
Lotus
Experienced
- Dec 17, 2019
- 235
Thanks for sharing, and I'm sorry to hear about everything you're struggling with. Ctb is a very tempting escape plan.
stygal
meow
- Oct 29, 2020
- 1,731
I can relate to all of you and feel so sorry that we all seem to share the same faith. Pain receptors...what a lovely invention from our gracious nature/god.
Been having chronic (nerve) leg pain without any existing remedy for over 5 years now and some mornings I wonder whether I'll go insane or am already...hmm....but then a completely healthy person comes along to tell me "to look on the bright side" or "enjoy the little things" or some shit and I'm
cured
Been having chronic (nerve) leg pain without any existing remedy for over 5 years now and some mornings I wonder whether I'll go insane or am already...hmm....but then a completely healthy person comes along to tell me "to look on the bright side" or "enjoy the little things" or some shit and I'm
cured
Gnip
Bill the Cat
- Oct 10, 2020
- 621
Authentic migraines have sometimes been treated with Autogenic Training, a form of self talk suggestion which includes sending messages to redirect blood flow from the head to the extremities. For example, the hands can be 65 degrees Fahrenheit, but volitionally elevated to a temperature of 99 degree Fahrenheit in a matter of minutes.
Heating the feet and hands while applying freezer gel packs to the head might produce the same effect, but this is only speculation, as my chronic headaches are caused by bone spurs in my neck rather than migraines.
What follows is a verbatim description of Autogenic Training.
Imagine being able to tell your body to relax-really relax-and have it respond! That's precisely what you may be able to do through autogenic training, a form of self-suggestion you can master in minutes and use every day to to help ease the symptoms of stress.
Autogenic (that is, self-regulating or self-generating) training was developed by Dr. Johannes Schultz and Dr. Wolfgang Luthe, both German neurologists, early in this century and published in 1932. The technique is based on their medical research (particularly in hypnosis and yoga, but without ceding some control of mind that hypnosis requires, or getting entangled in the mysticism and idealism of yoga) and has been used primarily to treat a variety of maladies, including migraines. But it seems to work best as a stress tamer.
Basically it consists of getting into a passive, relaxed frame of mind while giving your body a series of self instructions, such as, "My heartbeat is calm and regular." This hypnotic body talking, say researchers, can somehow produce physiological changes, including deep, stress releasing relaxation. And practicing, they say, makes it easier to get the body to "listen" and react.
Dr. Martin Schaffer, clinical psychologist, head of the Stress Management Institute in San Francisco and author of Life after Stress, explains the easy steps to autogenic relaxation.
As with other relaxation techniques, you need to get into a quiet room to begin. Turn the lights down low and wear loose clothing. Sit in a chair that comfortably supports your head, back, legs and arms. Or lie down with a pillow under your head, feet slightly apart, and arms at your sides but not touching your body. Get as comfortable as you can.
Then close your eyes and slowly recite the following instructions, breathing deeply and evenly, saying the verbal cues to yourself as you exhale.
1. "My hands and arms are heavy and warm" (five times).
2. "My legs and feet are heavy and warm" (five times).
3. "My abdomen is warm and comfortable" (five times). [Omit this step if you have ulcers.]
4. "My breathing is deep and even" (ten times).
5. "My heartbeat is slightly calm and regular" (ten times).
6. "My forehead is cool" (five times). [Note: Saying your forehead is "cold" instead of "cool" may result in headaches!]
7. "When I open my eyes, I will remain relaxed and refreshed" (three times).
Now perform the following sequence of body movements:
1. Move your hands and arms about.
2. Move your feet and legs about.
3. Rotate your head.
4. Open your eyes and sit up.
All this should be done with an attitude of passive concentration. Observe what's happening to your body, but don't consciously try to analyze it. By all means don't criticize yourself for having distracting thoughts. If your mind wanders, simply bring it back to to your instructions as soon as possible.
Dr. Shaffer advises doing 2-minute autogenic training sessions ten times a day. "When you spend ten little times a day bringing your tension level down, it's unlikely to get up that high," he says.
And be patient: Experts say that in some cases, autogenic training can take weeks to achieve the desired physiological effect.
Unexpected Results
Be forewarned that autogenic training is serious therapy and can have profound effects. There's a small chance that you may, for example, experience "autogenic discharges"-tingling or other body sensations, involuntary movements, pain, or even a desire to cry. "When that happens, simply do nothing," says Dr. Shaffer. "Tell yourself this is a normal discharge of tension in your body."
In rare cases, some people lie back, begin their autogenic rituals, but instead of feeling relaxed, lapse into a panic of anxiety. "That happens with people who need tension as a defense," says Dr. Shaffer. "They're getting rid of their tension and comes anxiety. Things they've not paid attention to are coming up to the surface." His advice is to just let it pass and continue the autogenic formula; if the agitation continues, stop the training and seek professional therapy to get to the root of your anxiety.
If you have high or low blood pressure, diabetes, hypoglycemic conditions or heart conditions, consult your physician before you even begin autogenics. Those with severe mental or emotional disorders are discouraged from even trying the technique. And if you find yourself feeling continually restless during or after autogenic sessions-or if you suffer any disquieting aftereffects-practice only under the supervision of a professional autogenic training instructor.
Source-POSITIVE LIVING AND HEALTH: The Complete Guide to Brain/Body Healing & Mental Empowerment, Rodale Press-Pages 249-250.
Heating the feet and hands while applying freezer gel packs to the head might produce the same effect, but this is only speculation, as my chronic headaches are caused by bone spurs in my neck rather than migraines.
What follows is a verbatim description of Autogenic Training.
AUTOGENIC TRAINING
Imagine being able to tell your body to relax-really relax-and have it respond! That's precisely what you may be able to do through autogenic training, a form of self-suggestion you can master in minutes and use every day to to help ease the symptoms of stress.
Autogenic (that is, self-regulating or self-generating) training was developed by Dr. Johannes Schultz and Dr. Wolfgang Luthe, both German neurologists, early in this century and published in 1932. The technique is based on their medical research (particularly in hypnosis and yoga, but without ceding some control of mind that hypnosis requires, or getting entangled in the mysticism and idealism of yoga) and has been used primarily to treat a variety of maladies, including migraines. But it seems to work best as a stress tamer.
Basically it consists of getting into a passive, relaxed frame of mind while giving your body a series of self instructions, such as, "My heartbeat is calm and regular." This hypnotic body talking, say researchers, can somehow produce physiological changes, including deep, stress releasing relaxation. And practicing, they say, makes it easier to get the body to "listen" and react.
Dr. Martin Schaffer, clinical psychologist, head of the Stress Management Institute in San Francisco and author of Life after Stress, explains the easy steps to autogenic relaxation.
As with other relaxation techniques, you need to get into a quiet room to begin. Turn the lights down low and wear loose clothing. Sit in a chair that comfortably supports your head, back, legs and arms. Or lie down with a pillow under your head, feet slightly apart, and arms at your sides but not touching your body. Get as comfortable as you can.
Then close your eyes and slowly recite the following instructions, breathing deeply and evenly, saying the verbal cues to yourself as you exhale.
1. "My hands and arms are heavy and warm" (five times).
2. "My legs and feet are heavy and warm" (five times).
3. "My abdomen is warm and comfortable" (five times). [Omit this step if you have ulcers.]
4. "My breathing is deep and even" (ten times).
5. "My heartbeat is slightly calm and regular" (ten times).
6. "My forehead is cool" (five times). [Note: Saying your forehead is "cold" instead of "cool" may result in headaches!]
7. "When I open my eyes, I will remain relaxed and refreshed" (three times).
Now perform the following sequence of body movements:
1. Move your hands and arms about.
2. Move your feet and legs about.
3. Rotate your head.
4. Open your eyes and sit up.
All this should be done with an attitude of passive concentration. Observe what's happening to your body, but don't consciously try to analyze it. By all means don't criticize yourself for having distracting thoughts. If your mind wanders, simply bring it back to to your instructions as soon as possible.
Dr. Shaffer advises doing 2-minute autogenic training sessions ten times a day. "When you spend ten little times a day bringing your tension level down, it's unlikely to get up that high," he says.
And be patient: Experts say that in some cases, autogenic training can take weeks to achieve the desired physiological effect.
Unexpected Results
Be forewarned that autogenic training is serious therapy and can have profound effects. There's a small chance that you may, for example, experience "autogenic discharges"-tingling or other body sensations, involuntary movements, pain, or even a desire to cry. "When that happens, simply do nothing," says Dr. Shaffer. "Tell yourself this is a normal discharge of tension in your body."
In rare cases, some people lie back, begin their autogenic rituals, but instead of feeling relaxed, lapse into a panic of anxiety. "That happens with people who need tension as a defense," says Dr. Shaffer. "They're getting rid of their tension and comes anxiety. Things they've not paid attention to are coming up to the surface." His advice is to just let it pass and continue the autogenic formula; if the agitation continues, stop the training and seek professional therapy to get to the root of your anxiety.
If you have high or low blood pressure, diabetes, hypoglycemic conditions or heart conditions, consult your physician before you even begin autogenics. Those with severe mental or emotional disorders are discouraged from even trying the technique. And if you find yourself feeling continually restless during or after autogenic sessions-or if you suffer any disquieting aftereffects-practice only under the supervision of a professional autogenic training instructor.
Source-POSITIVE LIVING AND HEALTH: The Complete Guide to Brain/Body Healing & Mental Empowerment, Rodale Press-Pages 249-250.
Green Destiny
Life isn't worth the trouble.
- Nov 16, 2019
- 871
I'm not suffering from any chronic illness (though my back will probably give me legit issues in a few years) but I can get where people like you are coming from. How is a life of constant pain everyday, a life worth suffering through all the way to the end? In my own opinion it simply isn't if it does nothing but wear you down with no hope of relief in sight. Please take care.
Gnip
Bill the Cat
- Oct 10, 2020
- 621
While pain issues aren't the reason I joined this site, I do receive regular bupivacaine injections into the left side of my neck, back of my head and small of my back and hips from an anesthesiologist who specializes in pain management. Early this afternoon, he gave my neck four shots and the back of my head another two injections. On November 5th, it'll be four more into the small of my back, guided by dye injected for imaging after I receive a mild anesthesia.
I kidded him during today's treatment about purchasing medical grade nitrous oxide from Airgas and alleviating my pain and other distresses with laughing gas like Henry Thoreau used dental nitrous prepared by his college classmate Henry Bigelow for nighttime frolics on the Charles River while they attended Harvard in the 1830's. Although my anesthesiologist was amused and impressed that I was familiar with the partying history of one of the mid 19th century's most noted authors, and is fully aware there are no restrictions on my legal access to it, he much prefers that I seek his services for help with my pain issues.
However, I just may go ahead and obtain a nice big aluminum tank filled with pure laughing gas anyway, just to check it out. Maybe inhaling small doses of it can help me sleep.
Fortunately, my pain anesthesiologist and chiropractor of 27 years have an excellent relationship and refer patients to one another. Additionally, my primary physician practices acupuncture, as does a different local chiropractor of mine who I have had administer needles to me in the past, a profound experience when it works. (It's not uncommon for patients in acute pain to be snoring within 20 minutes after having needles inserted into the body. Each acupuncture needle has a numbing effect.)
Get accurate images of any areas of your body in pain. Causes might turn up which otherwise might not have been expected. Then, targeted treatments can be administered. As it turns out, my spine is straight, nothing like scoliosis present, so issues like bone spurs and some of the compressed disks which reduced my original height by three inches were not expected to be seen and somewhat surprising. But now that they've seen the issues causing my pain, they can target some treatment relief with precision.
When in pain, try and access all diagnostic and treatment options you can. Don't be put off by some lazy or incompetent scammer or quack suggesting it's all only in your mind.
Bupivacaine injections with lidocaine directly into the forehead and face can help treat and relieve migraines according to clinical literature. I'll ask my anesthesiologist about his experiences in treating and relieving migraines when I see him next week. The important thing to remember when getting treatment for pain is to bypass useless psychologists and psychiatrists or neurologists and go directly to specialists who are strictly about the medicine, biological facts and relieving the pain itself. Don't waste time dealing with charlatans who want to address your state of mind. It's your body that hurts. It's a pain specialist's job to reduce to stop the pain, whether it's a competent chiropractor (very hard to find good ones), internationally certified acupuncturist, or medical pain specialist (again, because of my personal experience, I'm partial to the anesthesiologist who treats my pain, a fellow my mother recommended to me, as he's treated her for years with good results, relieving and preventing her pain from bone spurs and sciatica with epidurals periodically administered).
I kidded him during today's treatment about purchasing medical grade nitrous oxide from Airgas and alleviating my pain and other distresses with laughing gas like Henry Thoreau used dental nitrous prepared by his college classmate Henry Bigelow for nighttime frolics on the Charles River while they attended Harvard in the 1830's. Although my anesthesiologist was amused and impressed that I was familiar with the partying history of one of the mid 19th century's most noted authors, and is fully aware there are no restrictions on my legal access to it, he much prefers that I seek his services for help with my pain issues.
However, I just may go ahead and obtain a nice big aluminum tank filled with pure laughing gas anyway, just to check it out. Maybe inhaling small doses of it can help me sleep.
Fortunately, my pain anesthesiologist and chiropractor of 27 years have an excellent relationship and refer patients to one another. Additionally, my primary physician practices acupuncture, as does a different local chiropractor of mine who I have had administer needles to me in the past, a profound experience when it works. (It's not uncommon for patients in acute pain to be snoring within 20 minutes after having needles inserted into the body. Each acupuncture needle has a numbing effect.)
Get accurate images of any areas of your body in pain. Causes might turn up which otherwise might not have been expected. Then, targeted treatments can be administered. As it turns out, my spine is straight, nothing like scoliosis present, so issues like bone spurs and some of the compressed disks which reduced my original height by three inches were not expected to be seen and somewhat surprising. But now that they've seen the issues causing my pain, they can target some treatment relief with precision.
When in pain, try and access all diagnostic and treatment options you can. Don't be put off by some lazy or incompetent scammer or quack suggesting it's all only in your mind.
Bupivacaine injections with lidocaine directly into the forehead and face can help treat and relieve migraines according to clinical literature. I'll ask my anesthesiologist about his experiences in treating and relieving migraines when I see him next week. The important thing to remember when getting treatment for pain is to bypass useless psychologists and psychiatrists or neurologists and go directly to specialists who are strictly about the medicine, biological facts and relieving the pain itself. Don't waste time dealing with charlatans who want to address your state of mind. It's your body that hurts. It's a pain specialist's job to reduce to stop the pain, whether it's a competent chiropractor (very hard to find good ones), internationally certified acupuncturist, or medical pain specialist (again, because of my personal experience, I'm partial to the anesthesiologist who treats my pain, a fellow my mother recommended to me, as he's treated her for years with good results, relieving and preventing her pain from bone spurs and sciatica with epidurals periodically administered).
Lotus
Experienced
- Dec 17, 2019
- 235
I can relate to all of you and feel so sorry that we all seem to share the same faith. Pain receptors...what a lovely invention from our gracious nature/god.
Been having chronic (nerve) leg pain without any existing remedy for over 5 years now and some mornings I wonder whether I'll go insane or am already...hmm....but then a completely healthy person comes along to tell me "to look on the bright side" or "enjoy the little things" or some shit and I'm
Thanks for sharing and understanding. I know exactly what you mean about the latter, and I get kinda annoyed when it happens. If it was so simple I wouldn't be in this position. Really sorry to hear about your pain issues and lack of remedies.
Thank you for understanding and lots of support. I agree with you, and I hope it doesn't drag me completely down. But with anything else it's hard to keep your head up when life just keeps pushing you down. Hope your back stays as healthy as it can for a long time. Back pain is a real struggle too when it comes to medication and pain relief.
Thank you for sharing your experience and advices. I really appreciate it.
k75
L'appel du Vide
- Jun 27, 2019
- 2,546
I have several chronic conditions that definitely contribute to my being here. But specifically on the subject of headaches, I understand what you're going through somewhat. And I'm so sorry.
Migraines run in my family, although I've never in my life suffered from them. I've heard it skips a generation. My little sister gets them a lot but never sees a doctor for them.
Anyway, this year started with a massive headache, out of nowhere. At 1am on 1/1, I woke up with a splitting headache that made me vomit. (Should have known 2020 was going to be a shit year!) And it didn't go away until almost March. It literally didn't go away... 24/7 pain, never got even a little less intense.
I went to the emergency room 3 times, went to my primary care doctor, had head scans even. I wasn't really taken seriously. Nobody could seem to understand that it was one continuous headache, not frequently occurring headaches. They'd ask where the pain was, but I couldn't really answer because it moved all over. Sometimes in front, back, sides, multiple places at once, behind my eyes.
My last ER trip, they prescribed me some generic thing that says butalbital-acetaminophen-caffeine. Either the headache had finally run its course or that combo really works, because that's when it started to get better and went away soon after using all the meds.
Since, I've had random killer headaches but they haven't lingered like that first one. My doctor wouldn't prescribe me the caffeine stuff for some reason even though I said it worked, but he gave me Sumatriptan. I guess it works, but it's stupid because my insurance only covers 9 pills per month, and the dose is 2 pills... I guess I'm only allowed to have 4.5 headaches a month. Sometimes I have less, sometimes I have more. It's ridiculous to have to budget pain.
I'm kinda freaking out right now, because the original headache might be back. I woke up a few hours ago with the same symptoms. I don't even have anything to take for it. Can very much relate to people who jump off cliffs right now. I'm thinking that would feel better.
Migraines run in my family, although I've never in my life suffered from them. I've heard it skips a generation. My little sister gets them a lot but never sees a doctor for them.
Anyway, this year started with a massive headache, out of nowhere. At 1am on 1/1, I woke up with a splitting headache that made me vomit. (Should have known 2020 was going to be a shit year!) And it didn't go away until almost March. It literally didn't go away... 24/7 pain, never got even a little less intense.
I went to the emergency room 3 times, went to my primary care doctor, had head scans even. I wasn't really taken seriously. Nobody could seem to understand that it was one continuous headache, not frequently occurring headaches. They'd ask where the pain was, but I couldn't really answer because it moved all over. Sometimes in front, back, sides, multiple places at once, behind my eyes.
My last ER trip, they prescribed me some generic thing that says butalbital-acetaminophen-caffeine. Either the headache had finally run its course or that combo really works, because that's when it started to get better and went away soon after using all the meds.
Since, I've had random killer headaches but they haven't lingered like that first one. My doctor wouldn't prescribe me the caffeine stuff for some reason even though I said it worked, but he gave me Sumatriptan. I guess it works, but it's stupid because my insurance only covers 9 pills per month, and the dose is 2 pills... I guess I'm only allowed to have 4.5 headaches a month. Sometimes I have less, sometimes I have more. It's ridiculous to have to budget pain.
I'm kinda freaking out right now, because the original headache might be back. I woke up a few hours ago with the same symptoms. I don't even have anything to take for it. Can very much relate to people who jump off cliffs right now. I'm thinking that would feel better.
Lotus
Experienced
- Dec 17, 2019
- 235
Thanks for sharing. That's quite an experience, and I know the frustration about not taken seriously and just getting sent home to just deal with it on your own. I'm glad it got better, even if it was butalbital-acetaminophen-caffeine or not. I'll look more into it. I really hope that the original headache won't return. That sounds like a nightmare. I'm sorry that you don't have more pills on your insurance. My mom kinda prescribes me what I need because she's a doctor, so I don't need to worry about that. Have you tried the sumatriptan injection? The neurologists here say that it's the best medication, but for me it's just alright. I respond better to relpax pills.
Gnip
Bill the Cat
- Oct 10, 2020
- 621
Here's how devastating and treatment resistant migraines can be...in the late 1990's, the National Football League's Denver Broncos had a star running back named Terrell Davis who suffered severe migraine headaches which forced him into very premature retirement after he led his team to back to back Super Bowl Championships.
This is somebody who made tens of millions of dollars and was worth hundreds of millions of dollars to his team. Despite all his money, fame and importance, he was forced to quit in the middle of his athletic prime at the peak of his career because of migraine headaches.
With some medical conditions, no amount of money, medical expertise or attention can do any good. Migraines are one of those bastard conditions like arthritis or Alzheimer's where there often doesn't appear to be any hope of relief from or prevention of.
I offered up Autogenic Training as a potential self-help methodology, and extremity temperature biofeedback (volitional warming of the hands and feet) has also offered some relief and promise to migraine sufferers, but in my area, there have never been any certified Autogenic Training professionals or Biofeedback Certification International Alliance credentialed therapists, going back to the founding of the BCIA's precursor organization in 1969, the Association for Applied Psychophysiology and Biofeedback. (My native former state of Florida is a hotbed of BCIA practitioners, but they are much more needed in depressive dark dreary wintry cold climates, not the warm and sunny regions so many of them seem to gravitate to.)
Not one medical doctor or other prescriber I have ever spoken to about migraines has ever been able to name a single colleague who was a migraine sufferer. I don't believe it's necessary for a health care provider to be a migraine sufferer to have empathy and respect for the severity of the condition, but the ones I've worked with in hospitals and known since genuinely either don't have a clue, or give up before they even attempt to try helping migraine sufferers. By default, they thus automatically endorse CTB.
Desdemona
Member
- Oct 14, 2020
- 88
I'm so sorry you're going through that. I have various chronic pain conditions, so even when one isn't flaring another is. One of them gives me horrible headaches - to the point where I have to lay in bed and I feel nauseous and dizzy and feel pressure in my head. It's all day, every day pain. It's relentless and I also want to CTB due to my stupid failing body
Lotus
Experienced
- Dec 17, 2019
- 235
I'm so sorry to hear. It really sucks and it honestly feels so unfair. Lots of hugs.
peacechoice
Experienced
- Oct 11, 2020
- 205
Yeah, me too. Main reason to CTB is that quality of life matters more to me than any quantity here. I would rather have a good quality of life than many years. I also have a degenerative disease and when that shit gets worst than it already is, I'm out. Why the hell would society expect me to be in pain 24/7 and just live like this wtf. People are so damn delusional to other people's suffering it pisses me off.
Lotus
Experienced
- Dec 17, 2019
- 235
Yes, I agree. I really struggle to find a good reason to keep going, and this is tough to bear. I'm so sorry to hear about your degenerative disease and knowing that it will only get worse. Must be awful.
Hi, sorry for ur suffering. I also have chronic pain. Which type of pain do u have. Do meds not help at all for u
OpheliasFlowers
Specialist
- Apr 2, 2019
- 348
Hi Hyperbunny - thank you for your kind reply.
I have a number of different types of pain that bother me to varying degrees depending upon the day, but mainly my pain is abdominal and GI/belly pain. I have almost chronic nausea, for which I do have a standing Rx for Zofran, and anti-emetic. It does help some but some days it isn't so helpful, even if I take a bit more than my prescribed dose. I also have very frequent abdominal pain(s) from cramping and from adhesions from previous abdominal surgeries for a very severe case of endometriosis and then finally, I have a not-yet-diagnosed pain in my stomach (it's a 'boring', gnawing type of pain, almost like extreme hunger is best I can describe it. Nothing seems to alleviate it nor specifically cause it. It just started one day about 15 or so years ago and still happens. I've had CT scans, scopes, etc - they find 'abnormalities' but nothing serious and nothing that explains my pain and I don't like to take painkillers due to how hard they can be on one's stomach, and also dependence. So I just cope as best I can, which isn't very well anymore. I used to be able to handle the stomach issues and abdominal pain alright (not great, but not *too* badly) but in the last years everything's gotten worse, combined with my other health problems and worsened depression and anxiety. It's just all made me incredibly tired. And there isn't anything in my life to keep hanging on for - kids, a good marriage, friends, etc - so...I just want to sleep and never wake up.
How about you? What type of pain do you deal with. And I'm so sorry for YOUR suffering. Chronic pain is terrilble and with today's medical advancements and drugs, there should be no reason anyone should suffer chronic, life-altering daily pain. :( I apologize also if you've already explained your situation and I missed the post on this thread or elsewhere.
Thank you again for your reply to my post and kind words, and i hope you're having a pain-free day today.
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