Coping mechanisms

[Manfrotto99]

I am just wondering what peoples coping mechanisms are when you know ctb is inevitable and close by but you are just waiting for that right moment for your SI to give way?

How do other people get through each day when they know it's inevitable and life is only taking you on a miserable existence of needless suffering and pain. I am struggling with feeling immense fear and anxiety, while also feeling very angry and bitter for being forced into making this decision, due to circumstances beyond my control. I don't want to feed into this. I want to feel more at peace with things. I use to like gardening but I cannot do it now since I lost the company of my dog who was all I had. She loved being in the garden with me. I only find some bit of relief now for a couple of hours when im at the gym and challenge myself to lift weights. Any ideas on how I can come to peace with my decision and get through the days as I wait to ctb?

 

[TapeMachine]

I wish I could give you some sound advice, but my coping mechanisms are ultimately maladaptive. I distract myself with (1)online shopping and (2) keeping myself engaged in some sort of organization/cleaning/decorating project around the house (keeping my body busy keeps my mind distracted.)

Sometimes the distractions do not help at all. On particularly depressive days, summoning any motivation can be nearly impossible; so on those inactive days, I just sit around and consider everything I hate about myself and my life and take periodic naps throughout the day.. Which is how yesterday went. I want to cease existing so badly, I really do. I've had some grave epiphanies over the last 24+ hours, and I don't know how effective my copes are going to be from this point forward.

It's tough trying to cope with an existence that one cannot wait to dispose of.

 

[CantDoIt]

Isolating myself in nature with no other people around or simply scrolling through this website...I can't say it's especially helpful and I also don't want to give myself false hope

 

[Manfrotto99]

Isolating myself in nature with no other people around or simply scrolling through this website...I can't say it's especially helpful and I also don't want to give myself false hope

I wish I could isolate myself in nature, I think that is the best thing. There's no where to,do that around here unfortunately.

 

[kunikuzushi]

It's very difficult getting through every day. I usually spend my whole day trying not to panic about being alive by constantly listening to music so I can't think. If I'm not listening to music, I'm watching videos. And I spend 2-4 hours practicing guitar.

 

[SVEN]

I just don't really cope.