Celebration before Suicide

[NotOurFriend]

You know, I dont wanna kill myself at the Moment, I just want do die, If that makes Sense.
Somtimes i think to myself, wouldnt it be great, to gather all my Money, book a one way ticket to Thailand, rent a cheap room for like 2 weeks and then spending everything else on drugs and alcohol while partying all the time and having Sex with every beautiful guy i find there, knowing full well i am going to take a cyanide pill at the end of it. That would be the best two weeks of my life, the only two weeks i could enjoy without worrying, because i am going to kill myself at the end anyways. I would be able to do everything i want before i finally die.
Does someone have similar thoughts ? Does this Sound reasonable to you ?

Also i am fucking sober for like two days now, its a bad feeling, gonna start drinking tomorrow again, cause who the fuck actually cares. (Just thought i add this, dont know Why)

 

[kilowatt]

This is nice to think about but from my own experience it's not a good idea to *rely* on death. Sold well over half of my belongings and enjoyed myself for a bit just for my very detailed and throughly created CTB plan (that took me a good 4-5 months) to fail. I had everything sorted out besides control over my SI.
There's definitely hope for a scenario like this to work, but maybe I'm just too cautious to go over something like that again.

 

[Imagined_Euphoria]

I'm so fucking weird that all those activites wouldnt affect me to be honest. Alcohol, drugs, sex...I never felt much while doing it. 5 minutes happy, then its boring. I also don't feel like I should celebrate my death. I know it could have been different if this world just would stop to be so fucking cruel all the time.

 

[NotOurFriend]

I'm so fucking weird that all those activites wouldnt affect me to be honest. Alcohol, drugs, sex...I never felt much while doing it. 5 minutes happy, then its boring. I also don't feel like I should celebrate my death. I know it could have been different if this world just would stop to be so fucking cruel all the time.

Get it, but thats why i would fucking celebrate, to forget that shitty world we live in. At least for a bit.

 

[Draconis]

Yes i will travel to Thailand next year but it´s not gonna end there but i know people who have end their lives with rope in hotels there.

OD and drugs that will do the work can put you in prison their drug laws are insane when it comes to hard lethal drugs.

I try to live and celebrate some before i go...some travel and concerts..

 

[Forever Sleep]

Yeah, I've thought about it certainly. A more prudish version- not so much the sex and drugs but, travelling to see some beautiful places. I feel like I need to leave money behind though to sort out what's left behind to clear up. My death could very well shape up to be just as boring and full of paperwork as my life!