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B

byebyebyebyebye

Member
Mar 10, 2021
5
I've been obsessing over suicide for the past couple months, yet I can't find the motivation to go through with it. I even know how I want to ctb (jump off parking garage near my house) and I know the sooner I commit the better it'll be, but it's exhausting even preparing to go. I think I'm lowkey scared of messing up or backing out at the last second, but I have to take the plunge somehow.
 
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throwaway2goawy

throwaway2goawy

Member
Mar 7, 2021
52
I've not had the motivation previously and feel like it's the brain trying to say that you still have a bit of fight in you. You'll know when/if it's your time. Until them, keep trying to power through. You'll have plenty of time to be dead, no need to rush it.
 
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Tackingintothewind

Tackingintothewind

Mage
Mar 2, 2021
530
Why do you want to ctb?
 
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W

WornOutLife

マット
Mar 22, 2020
7,163
It's totally normal to be scared. After all, our damn SI is not gonna make things easy for us.
However, when you're really out of options, that might be the right time to go for it.
If you haven't ctb yet, you might still have one more chance at life. At least that's what seems be happening to me.

Best of luck
 
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russlinjimmies

russlinjimmies

Member
Feb 21, 2021
76
I think about ctb at least once a day, every day, and have for years. Some days are much more tempting than others. I've obsessed over methods and thought about when would be a good date, but I can never set a goal and seems if I give things long enough I start to feel better. The feelings always return though. I guess I've never felt the urge strong enough to actually try to see it through. Maybe one day.
 
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GarageKarate07

GarageKarate07

Wizard
Aug 18, 2020
671
If you need motivation just watch the political news from any country
 
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GarageKarate07

GarageKarate07

Wizard
Aug 18, 2020
671
i can confirm, helps very well
Im pretty sure we all just stood by today while children got blown up in a small defensless country just like yesterday and more than likely tomorrow. What is on Netflix tonight? I also remember these bank things that take all our money and cause debt on purpose being legal for the last 1000 year's. Also I believe Bill Gates and Monsanto's are buying all of our food and distribution. Surely this will be for good causes....
 
Moose.000

Moose.000

"Everything is meaningless" ~King Solomon
Apr 10, 2021
210
Don't look for it. If and when the day comes, you won't need motivation. Enjoy your walk through the forest, don't look for a poisonous snake.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
44,972
I get the feeling, the act of suicide when you actually go through with the method takes a lot of courage and energy. I think if you have a good plan then you can easily go through with it when you get the impulse.
 
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TheLomboq

TheLomboq

Member
Apr 6, 2021
24
The great majority of of people commit suicide out of impulse. Been reading through the suicide report of the state of Guyana (country with the highest suicide rate in relation to overall population) and it really lays that out quite well, if you'd like to grab yourself an interesting read.

I guess what I'm trying to get at, is that if you'd try to motivate yourself, you will find that extremely hard to achieve. It would in a way need to override your SI which is nagging at you constantly. And tricking that is even friggin harder.

The time will come and when it does you won't need to force it
 
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J

Journeytoletgo

Broken and hated 7-14 years long overdue
May 14, 2018
1,608
This is the WORSE. In permanent limbo, and having 0% no energy to fix it to commit the act. It's so hard. It's so tiring
 
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